faderift | { OPEN } The mood it changes like the wind

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{ OPEN } The mood it changes like the wind

WHO: Ellana and open
WHAT: Getting acclimated to Kirkwall
WHEN: Bloomingtide 4-11
WHERE: Gallows, dock, the city
NOTES: Nope.

{ the gallows }
It doesn't take much convincing for Ellana to take one of the free rooms available for the Inquisition's use. She's grown used to having her privacy and especially a nice bed, so when she comes with the second group in late Cloudreach, she's quick to claim a space. That said, there are times when she's amenable to company, even when not seeking it out, and she leaves the door to her room open so anyone passing can stop in. Sometimes she's reading cross-legged on her bed, other times she's playing her lute, the sounds of a bad note occasionally slipping through followed by a frustrated sigh.

{ the docks }
Ellana sometimes stops by to see friends who don't want to live in the Gallows, or to meander around the stables. Other times, she sits on the edge of the docks with her legs swinging, eating an apple or bit of bread as she watches the boats in the harbor. There's often a thoughtful look on her face and from time to time she'll look up at a passerby to ask: "How far do you think it is to Antiva by sea?" or "Have you ever been to Rivain?"

{ lowtown }
She doesn't expect a warm welcome at the alienage, but she mentions she's a friend of Merrill's and some elves are willing to talk to her. The fact that Ellana doesn't lecture them about how wonderful life would be for them in a clan helps, and when she mentions she's voluntarily left hers, there's a smug satisfaction on the faces of the others. But Ellana just shrugs and moves on, asking them about the city and knowing better than to show any pity for their lot. They make do, and she respects that.

When she leaves, it's still light out, but she has heard of the dangers of Lowtown even during the day. So with a wave of her hand, she sets the stealth spell she created on herself and slips back towards the gates at the docks. Maybe you're making your way back as well, and suddenly the space beside you that you swore was empty a moment ago is occupied by an elf with a smile.

"Hello. Heading back? Mind some company?"

{ for felix }
The Gallows is a big place, but there are some areas that Ellana frequents and it's not too difficult for Felix to find her when he needs her. Like now. She's just left the walled in herb garden and is walking across the expansive courtyard when she sees him after he's already spotted her. Her face brightens and she lifts her hand in a wave, moving to meet him.

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To be honest, Ellana takes a more philosophical approach to things. Bad things happen everywhere don't they? The Dales may have its sleepy villages and grand chateaus now, but they've been built on the battlefields of elves and humans, haven't they? And Kirkwall was the site of the last great battle between the elves and Tevinter before it became a slave port, before it became a center for blood magic and the abuse of mages. Clearly, no one has forgotten any of that, but it's not like they can go back in time and fix things, right? (Well, clearly people can move forward in time and then back, but her point still stands.) All they can do is try to build something good here for the future. Ellana thinks about that a lot: the future. Giving the elves a brighter future, adapting to a future without Felix. She's working on it. But first they need to defeat this immediate threat of Corypheus so that they can all have a future in the first place.

Hugging Felix back, she strokes hands down his back and shakes her head no.

"Not really. It seems like people are just settling in to their everyday duties, and I really don't have much if there are no missions to go on." The elven research will come a little later, once more information about what Corypheus is doing comes to light. Then she'll have a little more on her plate. "What about you? The Wardens keeping you busy?"

"Most of the work has been settling in as well," he admits. He pulls back just enough to take her hand. "I would like something to distract me, if I'm honest."

Then, after a moment, "Do you want to go on a walk with me? We could go see the dock and watch the water for a bit." There were some parts of the dock that were less busy than others.

"Of course. I've enjoyed watching the water, and you really do get used to the fish smell." She smirks up at him and swings their hands as they walk in that direction. She's passed time staring out at the water, wondering where these ships are coming in from and where the ones going out are going to. It makes her want to hop aboard one heading to Rivain, because she hasn't found a land yet she likes even half as much. She's so safe there in that country where humans and elves get along. Of course, the Qunari in the north mean that safety might not always be on that land, but she hopes they leave and let the Rivaini live as they choose.

"I suppose we'll still be sleeping apart?" she asks without any bitterness. The Wardens have their place, and she has hers.

He gives her an apologetic look. "I think so... At least until we have more of an idea where the Wardens fit in right now." He has heard stories of men and women who are Wardens but still spend time with their families. It can't be forever.

He holds onto her hand as the walk. "Once we do get to the place were we can be together more, where would you want to go?" he asks. He doesn't know that she's thinking of Rivain, of course, but being in this place makes him think of Tevinter and how it's unlikely he'll ever return to live.

"It's all right," she assures him. This is all part of who they are, and she's finally really accepted that instead of just thinking she has.

"That depends. Do you mean within the Inquisition, or after?"

"After," he clarifies. "Once all of this has settled down and we can build something of a life together." At least for the limited amount of time that she had him, that was, but he doesn't bring that up. He doesn't want to start their fight all over again.

Thankfully she's gained some clarity on the matter. It sucks majorly, but it's also all they have. Better make it count, right?

"Well, being here and looking out into the harbor makes me miss Rivain. I would love to return there. The Dalish clan outside Dairsmuid was so welcoming, even to humans. And the humans in the city were perfectly nice to me too. Of course, I haven't forgotten the Qunari in the north, but southern Rivain might be a nice place to settle for awhile." And after Felix is gone, she might stay with the Rivaini Dalish for a little bit, until she can deal with her grief. But she doesn't bring that up either.

"I'm very used to living under the threat of the Qunari," he points out, with a small smile to show that he isn't all that worried about it. He thumb strokes the back of her hand. "I hear Rivain is very nice. I'd be happy to live there with you." Even more if it provides a community she can rely on.

"Oh." Ellana exhales an embarrassed little laugh at that. Of course he knows. And she also notes he hasn't suggested a place himself. "So you're all right with that? Were there any other places you wanted to discuss?" She knows that he knows Tevinter is out of the question for her, but she's curious if he's had any thoughts, since he brought this up.

"Well, Orlais was fun for school, but I wouldn't want to live there," Felix points out, and there's a wry way that he speaks that shows it's meant as a drag against Orlais rather than a real option. He also hates the idea of living there because she would never really be looked on as the powerful woman she is.

He offers her a half smile at the joke and then grows more serious. "And Tevinter... it's, well, Tevinter." That gets closer to what he had wanted to talk about. "I've always said that I love my country, but since coming south with my father I've had to question a lot about it."

And Orlais houses the Dales, but Ellana wouldn't want to live there either. It would be like being in the clan again; always having to move away from hostile humans wanting to come in.

"Right. It's good if you're a Magister, but so many aren't, and there are people who... may not love it as much." She worries her bottom lip for a moment before gently adding, "I could never live free there."

"I know," Felix admits. He looks down for a moment before focusing on what they are doing again. "That's part of what I wanted to talk about, actually. Tevinter. And it's history. This place... It seems to make it impossible to pretend it's anything to be proud of." Admitting that is difficult for him, and his voice cracks a bit in an oddly emotional way.

Ellana listens, and the emotion with which Felix brings to the conversation has her eyes widening in surprise. But she's quick to cover his hand with her free one so she's sandwiching his between hers. It's impossible to put herself in his shoes -- to see his home the way he does. Here she took it for granted that Tevinter did horrible things here, because Tevinter has done that everywhere and the evidence lingers on in ruins. But for him, he was raised to view things differently, wasn't he? She'll do her best to try and understand.

"I'm afraid empires do things like this," she says gently. "They stop seeing people as people, and more like things that can bring in wealth and prosperity."

Felix sighs a bit and squeezes her hand very gently. It means everything that she is offering support instead of judging him. He never would have thought that she would, of course, but it's still reassuring to hear the tone in her voice now.

"That's why I want to go to the docks, to see the water, of course, but also to remember how many souls were brought through it only to die in the mines or the pits of this city." After a pause. "It's not a very romantic date, I'm sorry."

She really shouldn't laugh, but he's right; this is the least romantic date night ever.

"There will be other dates," she replies, quick to lead him around the last of the Inquisition's buildings to the open space surrounding the docks. He wants to see the water, so here they are.

"I think that's why there's been so much debate over these statues. They're a reminder of what happened here, but should they stay to remind us, or should they go because they represent a past that doesn't exist here now? Should we have a representation of something good instead?"

Felix looks out into the water and then takes a deep breath.

"How do you feel about the ruins of your people?" he asks. Then, quickly, he adds, "Not that I'm comparing your empire with mine, of course."

"The ruins... make me sad," she admits. "They were once places where my people lived, or worked, or worshiped. But they also excite me, because it connects me to the past -- to them. I get to walk where they walked and see what they saw. At least somewhat. They're ruins, after all. But the mosaics or statues that survive are what they saw too."

He nods at that, accepting it. He wishes there was a way for them to share in that, but there's always a level of guilt there. "Tevinter ruins seem to just be a reminder that we once attempted to enslave the world."

Ellana doesn't realize it yet, but it's not a bad thing so much of elven history has been lost. Because once it's uncovered, they'll know the truth about the Creators, and how they were no better than Tevinter, enslaving people in order to show off their power. For now, she can't relate to Felix and what he feels when he sees these things.

"I can't imagine what that feels like," she admits. "Life in the south can't be easy for you, when your whole life you were surrounded by the good things, or at least protected from the bad."

Felix hums a bit in thought, uncertain. "There were some very good things," he admits. "In both the north and the south." He smiles at her then, making a point to hint that she was one of the best things about the south.

Ellana returns the smile, touching his arm with affection. He will always succeed in making her feel special and valued, and she hopes she can return that sentiment even have as much because he certainly deserves to know it.

"But you're feeling out of sorts here, aren't you? Looking at what Tevinter left behind."

"Something like that," Felix replies after a moment of thought. It was hard to fully explain, but he wants to try. He wants her to know how he feels about this, and wants to feel comfortable talking about it with her. He wants that level of connection with her.

"You know, before I left for university I..." He pauses, and for a moment he feels real shame over this. "I didn't see what was so wrong about slavery. As long as the slaves were well cared for, I thought it better than poverty. But then I went to Orlais and lived in a place where people could openly speak about the desire for freedom, and it made me rethink a lot about my life. When I returned home, it seemed to be everywhere. I was sick, though, unable to do anything of value to end the way things were. Are. The way they still are."

He presses his lips together in thought. "And now I am here, reminded that I did nothing to end the crimes of my homeland."

This is a heavy topic, but at least he knows better now. Not to the full extent, of course, but then again, neither can she as she's never been a slave. But she knows more than he does what it's like to be viewed as someone lessen and someone who should do what they're told.

Ellana doesn't tell him that it's all right; that he would have if he could. Guilt is better erased through actions, not words. "Do you think it's possible you could do something now? Your duty to the Wardens must come first, I know, but there must be networks within Tevinter looking to sneak out slaves to freedom."

Felix nods at that. "I wonder if Maevaris is planning anything of the sort?" he muses aloud. "Or I could always work on convincing Dorian? He still... Well, he's not perfect, despite what he thinks. I might be able to convince him to set up something like that and when he returns home he'll better in a position to do something about it."

Dorian always had ambition to change Tevinter. This could be a way to better it. "I could also write. I've been told I have the ability to sway some with my words. If I wrote out the reasons we should change, maybe it would change some minds."

Squeezing his arm, she nods seriously. He already has several avenues he can take with this, which means it's something he can get started on and that, in turn, could potentially help a lot of people escape lives of slavery in the foreseeable future.

"You should definitely start asking your friends. They'll be your gateway back to Tevinter. And writing would be a great way to do something now, even while you're here. Go for it."

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