[OPEN] Running with my roots pulled up

[amygdalae]

WHO: Bruce Banner and whoever else
WHAT: Rumors abound. Bruce is good at pretending he can't hear anything. A dracolisk makes everyone's life hell.
WHEN: Across Justinian
WHERE: Skyhold
NOTES: Belated open log thing for the remainder of June; prompts and such are under the cut. Starting in brackets but feel free to switch to prose and I will follow. If you want specific prompts/starters, let me know @ knightblazer or PM this journal!

one. trouble on four hooves. (stables)

[It's not exactly the first time the horsemaster is on his case and it probably won't be the last as well, if the current situation is to go by it.

Horsemaster Dennet wasn't exactly thrilled with the dracolisk that had decided to trail all the way back here with him (muttering along the lines of 'as if one of them wasn't enough'), but the one that Bruce... was stuck with had a tendency for more collateral damage. Nothing major, at least, but after breaking three gates and four fences in its apparent nightly ritual of getting out of the stables there were some lines that needed to be drawn. Thus, this current situation.

The hammer in his hand pounds loudly against the nails as Bruce does his best fixing up the damage the dracolisk had caused in the last few nights. The sleeves of his threadbare shirts are rolled up, for even with the chill here pounding away like this still made him sweat quite a bit, especially as he continued to toil away the hours.

Beside him the dracolisk chewed delicately on some hay, clearly much calmer and less prone to violence now that its human was around.]

two. not quite back to business (healing tents, courtyard)

[It was impossible to ignore the rumors, even if they weren't that hotly circulated, for better or for worse. But still the damage had been done and it would be a lie if he said that things were the same as before.

Nothing was the same as it used to be. After the fallout with Adelaide things didn't really quite look up. Patients who once came to him for help now avoided his gaze entirely and went to others, and the new ones who came in now looked at him with wariness, with all the suspicion that frustrated Bruce more than anything else. This was one of the reasons why he hid his magic away, why he stuck to herbs and what he could do with nothing but his head and his own two hands. He was here to help and he didn't need his magic to do it. It wasn't worth any of this.

(But of course, he deserved it. He knows that. He deserves every bit of this.)

Still, regardless of everything, he came here to do a job and despite all that had happened, there were always going to be people who needed help. So Bruce does the best he can, going around the courtyard to treat whoever was willing to accept his help and aiding anybody who came to his tent while he was in there.]

three. midnight mulling (battlements)

[The battlements had, in a way, become something of a sanctuary to him now. When the night gets this dark and most of Skyhold is asleep, the biting chill of the cold and the silence of the night comforts him well.

On most other nights he'd have the excuse of potion brewing to be up here but tonight that desire isn't there. He sits on the floor, back against one of the walls as he glances out to the mountains that surround them, the sky above that twinkle with countless stars. When everything feels so vast and overwhelming its easy enough to lose himself into the sight, to let them take him away from the chaos of his mind and his soul. To find that momentary peace within himself again, when every part of him rages for something else otherwise.]

wildcard.

[Feel free to throw in your own prompt or PM/contact me to plot out stuff!]

Comments

[amygdalae]

[It's--surprising, to hear that. Considering her position he thought she would be thinking otherwise, but that's actually surprising. It takes him a moment longer than he expects to process this.]

I didn't think I'd be with the Inquisition for so long. [This, too, is truth. In all his years he's always wandered, never staying anywhere for long, always on the move - it had been necessary, then. But now with the chaos that's erupted all over Thedas since the Rift that opened at the Temple of Scared Ashes... A lot of things have changed since then. But Bruce can't just assume the best. He always assumes the worst. Paranoia is what kept him out of harm's away - what kept others safe. And that is one thing that hasn't changed.

He glances back briefly to the Seeker, sending over a questioning look.] If magic is indeed a gift, then why are there so many dangers with it? If magic is something that's meant for good, why does it always end up hurting people instead?

[arcaneadvisor]

[If you ever have a child and live through such times as she has, with such a terrible parent? Sometimes you must worry far from their bed when they lie sleeping soundly, tucked up safely with their sending crystal close, the door locked and warded, their favourite stuffed nug snuggled next to them. Usually she would prowl but well, don't restless things seek other restless things out?]

How many a tale is told of a man alone upon a mountain or a tower, or battlements such as these, wondering at the twists and turns his life did take. [A sigh escapes, soft, almost sharp, swallowed by the wind that disturbs the magic in her hands and ruffles the feathers of her robes though she doesn't shiver.] Tis more surprising to see you here rather than by the tents or the gardens, perhaps you wished to avoid company entirely?

[foxsays]

[What a mysterious horse.

She might have thought it would eat flesh. It has the look of a cruel and biting sort of thing that rips and tears to her. A lurking sort of thing. But she's not accustomed to very large land animals still and the Western Approach had lots of things that seemed to exist exclusively to want to murder her so it seems a reasonable assumption.]

If I was the horsemaster, I would be more sensible in asking favours from a doctor - say setting a bone if one of these things kicks me because they are prone to kicking. Or even helping to heal the horses. Or the...the new thing. What is this mysterious spiky dragon horsebeast? This is a waste of your many talents, isn't it? Hammering nails?

[stabsbooks]

[ Well. If they're going to have this conversation, she's not going to do it looming over him. Cassandra settles herself down against the wall, sitting next to Bruce but keeping well out of his personal space. ]

'Magic exists to serve man, and never to rule over him.' One of the Maker's sacred commandments. In an ideal world, it would always be followed. But we are far from ideal creatures. Magic in itself is not dangerous, any more than a knife in itself is dangerous. It is the person wielding it who determines whether it is used to help or to harm.

healing tents

[madame_de_fer]

[Madame de Fer is livid. No, that's too mild a word for the seething fury she's crossing through the fortress with. So cold is her demeanor, one can almost see the grass and rock freezing over as she passes by. Apostacy happens. Lying about having magic? A different crime altogether. Lying, even by omission, to her face? Very poor life decision.

She's heard about Bruce having magic. Asked around with trusted acquaintances who were also witnesses. Had a glass of quality wine. Hired movers to have his belongings rearranged. Taken several, deep centering breaths. Now she is quite ready to seek him out.

Vivienne stands in the entry of the healing tents with her arms folded over her chest with a firm frown etched into her face.]

healing tents

[unbrokenoath]

[ When she was first told, she'd laughed right in the face of the very confused gossiper. Not because she found it that unbelievable, but because it figured. She had, apparently, developed a taste for rogue apostates. Maybe she should grill Asher to make sure he wasn't hiding any magic, either.

When the man gossiping to her gets into less flattering words, she knocks his chair over, and steps over him on her way to the healing tents.

There, she plops down, waiting until she can get Bruce's attention, and promptly wiggles her eyebrows at him, leaning in. She's bound and determined to do...something. Cheer him up, or irritate him enough that he doesn't care about rumors, maybe. Or at the least, let people see that she's not afraid to deal with him. ]

Hey there. Remember that promise you made to kiss all my booboos better? Well, I've got this cut right on my lip...

[amygdalae]

[When said as such, Bruce can't quite deny the truth of her words. He supposes its all rather obvious, from how late it is to the fact of him looking out into the distance. He lets out a quiet sigh of his own, feeling the chill of the wind as it blows by, his thin shirts giving little comfort from the cold despite the layers he's worn.]

I've never been the best for company. [Solitude is what he's lived with for years, and at this point its more of a comfort than what most other things can provide for him.] But it's quiet here. Peaceful.

[And with those, its much easier to pretend that there isn't a horde of people whose trust he's broken.]

[amygdalae]

[It does indeed eat flesh, but right now its placated enough with some hay and the company of the human its chosen to stick itself to - not that Bruce wants to admit the latter, since that leads to things he'd rather not think about. There's so many reasons why being actually responsible for something won't end well for him.

The words from her bring out a small laugh from Bruce, though the amusement that it brings is little.] It's called a dracolisk. [He begins to explain over the pounding of the hammer.] They're mounts, albeit more exotic than your average horse. And while I do appreciate your confidence in my abilities, my surgical skills don't quite apply to animals. Though if you do end up needing a bone set, I'll do my best to make it painless.

[amygdalae]

[They're all far from ideal, but Bruce himself is more than that. He's ruined, dammed, broken and twisted into something that should have never be. But yet here he was, still living, still existing. Not for the first time, he wonders what was the point of him still being alive. Why does a person like him continue to live while so many others die?]

With a knife, one still has a choice in using it or keeping it aside. It's not the same with magic. [Once you have it it always haunts you and never lets you go, like a ghost that never fades.] Is it wrong to not want to use something so dangerously volatile? I know I've lied, but at the same time I've kept my word. I've never allowed myself to use magic except in the most dire circumstances.

[And until this it had only been... what, three times? Bruce always made it a point to avoid anything that could have required him to use any of his magic. Its why he stays in the camps, why he focuses on treating instead of fighting.]

[amygdalae]

[Bruce supposes this is a tune he has to face eventually. Adelaide is one thing, but the Iron Lady? That's a whole different song altogether.]

Madame de Fer. [He greets as he steps out of the tents after a long day's work. The expression on his face is placid and his voice is quiet, hiding any trace of emotion that he might feel. Better to get this over with as soon as he can.

After a brief pause from his initial greeting, he inclines his head and adds on--] I trust you have been well.

[Perhaps not the best thing to say, but well. Bruce never said he was good at things like these.]

ser kaisa pls

[amygdalae]

Just a minute, I'm--ah.

[Bruce hears the sound of something settling in first before he finally does turn around to see who it is, pausing for the briefest of moments once he registers who he's seeing. To his own credit, he manages to keep a very straight face as the Warden speaks, the only indication that he's listening through the blinking of his eyes.

When she gets to the latter part of what she's saying, he stifles down a sigh.]

Ser Kaisa. [He starts, in perhaps the blandest way possible.] I have an ointment that can help with the cut on your lip, should you truly need it.

deserves better when he's not being a lil shit

[tactical_alert]

Then I don't imagine it will distress most too much to have the beast put down so it ceases being a potentially dangerous disturbance. I suppose we ought to up watches at the gates if something like this can get in so easily...

SCROLLS FOR THE SCROLL THRONE

[fleurdesel]

You are joining me in the gardens this morning for lessons.

[ Advanced lessons, yes, they will be doing most of the demonstrations for the day. What better excuse to wring out what exactly is and isn't the truth from what he'd written? ]

[unbrokenoath]

[ Kaisa immediately thinks of at least ten ways to reply to that, each more obscene than the next, with a particular focus on what his ointment might be. However, she restrains herself, and instead just pouts at him, puffing her cheeks out. ]

Ointments taste weird. I think my idea is better.

[justice_is_blond]

[This is such a grey area, and Justice hates grey areas. Bruce is dangerous. But frankly, so is Anders. Anders presses his lips together before sighing.]

Do you need a refresher on any of the basics, since seeing as you're still around here I'm guessing that you'll be assisting regularly with magic? And would you like to work on... Maker, I don't know if it's a good idea or the worst idea, but possibly working with it, [he jerks a chin in Bruce's direction to signify that he means Rage,] to help with healing?

[foxsays]

[Well once at twelve, a girl in need of a little settling down was handed a baby fox that got into every sort of mischief that could ever be thought of and look at-- So he's her partner in crime, quite literally, but her life is all the richer for having him in it.]

Why are so many large creatures upon the land in Thedas so strange? Is this some rule you are all taught that no one thinks to tell us? I read extensively prior to the Western Approach but still I was not quite prepared for having to take down a quillback when I had to. [And then there were the varghests whenever she wanted to cool off somewhere by the water. Rude. Incredibly rude.] A leg is a leg, no? Lux, you would agree with me? [The fox is happy to be including and thus makes a show of strutting over near Bruce, plopping himself down and extending one paw out as Araceli comes around to join him, crouching down to lift a few nails. Because she heard rumours. Confirmed them with her favourite and most reliable sources. And she isn't sure what to think really.] Would magic make setting a bone painless?

[Her question is light: he can lie if he wishes, he can evade. This isn't like the almost interrogation of Anders when Korrin came into their rooms furious but a little bit of her is hurt since she remembers what he said when she met him all that time ago, and she took him for a man of his word.]

[arcaneadvisor]

You are not the first I have met up here either, though the other still looked out in search for a lost friend. [Poor Ruby, no one knows for certain where rifters might go, and Morrigan is fond of her too when she sees something that she recognises in her, no matter how unexpected. And at least she isn't furious: Anders, well, that was more personal. Complicated. Grey Wardens and abominations and her son wrapped up too tightly. Bruce is many steps removed and he has never wished anything of her either.]

A rarity within these walls. [Morrigan has her reputation, but even that isn't enough so she's in agreement with him here. People are bold, people will talk; they forget that she hears so very much.] And you must value such moments, to collect oneself. [Her next words are not precisely a gamble, since she isn't the sort, but Kieran likely has a reputation and Bruce works around Adelaide after all.] Not even I suspected though children have a way of seeing what we overlook.

[amygdalae]

With so many people around, even a large fortress like this can feel incredibly crowded.

[Bruce certainly feels as such - even more now, with all the rumors about him. Avoiding people and crowds has never been harder these days. More than once he's tempted to put in his resignation and leave the Inquisition entirely--but the commitment he has to his patients is something he can't turn away from. There are still so many that need help and Bruce could never turn them away.

He hunches a little, trying to make himself smaller at Morrigan's next words - an instinctive reaction more than anything else. Bruce has never liked talking about the dark parts of himself that he'd rather remain buried. All things considered his mage status is just the surface - but it's still something.]

I had practice. [He eventually says after a long pause.] People are always trying to see the obvious signs; once you hide them, its much easier to blend in.

[Another pause.]

Children always did know better, though. [And Kieran did seem like an incredibly sharp child.]

[amygdalae]

I wouldn't call them strange - more of 'exotic', if anything.

[Then again, he supposes to one who has no knowledge of Thedas before... he supposes he can see how these can all seem so strange to her. In a way, there's envy in that thought. Of being in some place that wasn't Thedas, a land where these sorts of sufferings were unheard of.

He finishes hammering the nail into the joint just as the fox trots over to him, and Bruce glances down at it, blinking at the outstretched paw for a few moments before her next words take his attention.

--to the matter at hand, then.]

It depends on the severity of the injury. [Bruce takes a nail from the pile near him and sets it where it needs to be.] There's only so much pain magic can numb away before the healing itself becomes compromised. [He starts to hammer down the nail after that, the loud thunks sounding out once again.]

[amygdalae]

[Of all the bad ideas you had, Anders, that was probably one of the worst. Perhaps save blowing up a Chantry, because that's on a whole other level.]

No. [He snaps out, a kneejerk reaction to the mere suggestion of tapping its power. A moment passes after that, and then Bruce lets out a sharp exhale, lips pursed tightly together before he speaks again.] I didn't--my apologies.

[Another pause as Bruce recollects himself.]

I can work just fine without requiring external help. [It's harder, yes, but Bruce refuses to touch its power any more than he already has to. It's far too uncertain and volatile and Bruce doesn't want to cause even more risks than the ones he already carries around.] I'll still stick to non-magic healing for the most part, unless somebody specifically requests it of me.

he has his moments

[amygdalae]

[Bruce glances over to the other with one raised eyebrow.]

Putting it down? That's a bit extreme, don't you think?

[More like 'very', but Bruce can be polite about this.]

STAFFS FOR THE STAFFS... LORE

[amygdalae]

[Lessons? Bruce takes a second to process that, and then he glances over to the staff that Adelaide has with her.]

I don't have the necessary... equipment.

[Bruce got rid of the staff he had used in the Approach pretty quickly once they were out of the Fade, and whatever healing he's done since then was without the need of a staff. He's no combat mage after all, and years of habit have made him used to functioning without one. It sticks out far too much when he's attempting to keep himself hidden.]

[amygdalae]

[Good thing Kaisa doesn't say of those, because it would be pretty awkward on Bruce's end.

Even so, the face she makes is... something in and of itself. Bruce bits down another sigh that threatens to escape him.]

There are no healing properties in spit, no matter what anybody else might say.

ROBES FOR THE ROBE BONE

[fleurdesel]

What you do not have will be provided.

[ As is true for all students that take this class. Adelaide crosses her arms, chin tilted up, cool and imperious and vaguely annoyed that he has not simply complied. He ought to know by now that she is more stubborn than him by far. ]

This is not a request, Bruce.

TOMBS FOR THE TOMB STORE

[amygdalae]

[Two for two can match that stubbornness, Adelaide. Bruce could push his way if he really wanted to, but its out of old friendships and guilt at his own end which makes him relent to her insistence of trying to take charge over him. Despite the fact that she really shouldn't.]

Fine. [It comes out a bit harsh, but Bruce isn't entirely sorry for that.] Just give me fine minutes to prepare.

[And without waiting for her answer he goes back into his tent to do just that.]