He pauses the bathing and leans close, resting his temple to Nate's, careful to not put weight on the man. Nate almost didn't outlive him. Nate had almost lost his life, and Anders had almost lost him. Herc is a blow that will not be easily carried. But it's not as devastating as losing Nate would have been.

"If you hadn't outlived him..." There are so many people he owes. He couldn't have stayed alongside Herc, couldn't have lied about hearing the calling as well, but how he would have wanted to. "I can't lose you. He was a good man, but I don't need someone to make sure I'm safe. I need you."