CLOSED: When you smile, you knock me out, I fall apart

[mythalenaste]

WHO: Pel, Anders, Cyril, and Merrick
WHAT: Really frigging long labor and fairly short confinement.
WHEN: Forward-dated to Bloomingtide 18-24
WHERE: The Gallows
NOTES: CW for giving birth. TW for blood. Both will be marked on the relevant threads.

You will come of age with our young nation
We’ll bleed and fight for you, we’ll make it right for you
If we lay a strong enough foundation
We’ll pass it on to you, we’ll give the world to you
And you’ll blow us all away

Comments

Bloomingtide 18

[mythalenaste]

Anders - around 4:00 AM

"Anders?" Pel's tone is businesslike. "I wanted to give you more time to sleep, but it's absolutely happening now. Waters still intact, everything coming regularly but slowly. And I don't think I can make it to the docks."

Merrick and Cyril - around 8:00 AM

"I went into labor proper last night. You can come in if you like."

[justice_is_blond]

It takes a few seconds for him to register what's going on, but then he's getting up, kissing Nate's forehead, and murmuring an apology as he grabs his kit. Then the whole of it sinks in and Anders freezes for a moment. In the Gallows. He has to go in, and without the near hour of prep he's had to take with every previous trip.

"Okay," he says over the crystal
She's not the only one he's saying that to; Anders needs to remember that this is fine. He's fine. He's going to deliver a child, something he's done hundreds of times before. The surroundings won't be optimal, but he can manage.

"Okay," he says again, "I'm on my way. How long between contractions?"

[mythalenaste]

"I don't exactly have a clock anywhere. Long enough apart that I can't doze off in between, though. Maybe ten minutes. And I've been trying to sleep as much as I can, but I can't sleep at all anymore."

[justice_is_blond]

"That's good enough. I'm on my way over. Feel free to walk around, and most importantly stay hydrated." At least he doesn't have to ask if she has fluids; she's a mage. Ice and fire make that part easy.

Somehow, without Nate's support, he makes it into the Gallows and doesn't have a panic attack. The focus of having a patient helps with that, and he keeps it as his only focus as he finds and knocks on Pel's door.

"It's Anders."

[mythalenaste]

"Come in."

Once her midwife enters, Pel is preparing. On a table is a half-finished breakfast that is going cold. She has the sheets stripped back on her bed and is putting down some brown paper. There is a basin of steaming hot water and a pile of ragged but clean towels. At once, she stops, resting her hand on the mattress and closing her eyes, face strained, taking deep breaths through her nose.

[justice_is_blond]

Anders steps over to her, resting a hand on her shoulder and getting a feel for what's going on with her body. After a moment he nods and steps away to give her room.

"We've some time yet, but it's best that you called now." He doesn't want her to think he's upset at the early call. This is part of childbirth, after all.

"Do you think you can finish your breakfast? I can warm it for you." The kit's opened up, herbs and tools set out just in case they're needed.

[mythalenaste]

Once the contraction passes, Pel lifts her head and nods. "I've been picking at it. I kept finding ways to stay busy, though. I want this to go quickly. I feel like I've prepared for everything in the world except this. Sylaise save me, nothing really prepares you for this. It's like being stepped on my a bronto."

[justice_is_blond]

"It's not going to go quickly," he says gently. "It rarely does, except for women who have given birth a couple of times. Your body is adjusting so it can give birth. That's not a simple process."

He warms the food quickly before bringing it back over to her. "We're going to be in this stage for a while, more than likely. You should get done any last-minute things you have left for now and be ready for waiting."

[mythalenaste]

She climbs into bed, figuring if she's not sleeping she should at least be resting. A small smile and a thanks as she takes the food from him.

"I've done everything. Twice over. Except--no, I've done that." She stirs the hot cereal with a frown. "I can always knit." She pauses and takes a few deep breaths--not pain, but something else just as strong.

"It's happening. It's really happening. I'm about to meet her." And her face blooms into a grin. Somehow, she thought she'd be a little more afraid than she is, not having a Keeper or her mother here with her. But for now, there is only joy. That joy will be her strength in the hours--days?--to come.

[justice_is_blond]

Anders smiles back, catching some of the excitement.

"You are," he confirms. "You're close to meeting little Sina. We've a little work ahead of us, but she's on her way." He settles into a chair and gets as comfortable as he can. There's not much else to do for a time here. "It couldn't hurt to knit, pass the time in a way that you can set to the side and it won't suffer for it."

[mythalenaste]

A little work, he says. He makes it sound so very encouraging, and Sylaise help her, she believes him. She believes this is a trivial moment in a life spent wanting children. Surely it cannot be as painful as the longing and the waiting.

"You can have the bed if you want to lie down and sleep," she offers. "If you can, you should."

[justice_is_blond]

"Says the woman who needs support." He shakes his head with a warm smile, turning down the offer of her bed. "I'm fine. Trust me, I've spent nights in far less comfortable circumstances. Did you know I had to spend 48 hours with a mabari sharing my shelter, once? And there was a horrible burnt garlic smell in the hut, too."

[mythalenaste]

Pel's nose wrinkles. "Ugh, mabari. They're all slobbery and over-bred." She shovels some hot cereal into her mouth and sits back. "I would have a cat," she says around her mouthful of food. "You always know where you stand, with a cat. And they earn their keep."

[justice_is_blond]

He grins.

"I have a cat. I'd not mind another. Though I do deal with a tiny mabari for the sake of my husband." Anders shrugs. "She makes him happy, and he keeps her clean, at least. They're not as Fereldan a pair as they could be. You should get a cat, after Sina's a little older. Too young and cat scratches can be dangerous."

There's a very good reason why he left Purrelden in his room, and it's not just because she scooted into his warm spot the moment he was up.

[dalishious]

Merrick arrives in his usual fashion--through the window, like an oversized bird--and quickly moves to Pel's side. He gets on the bed with her, and takes her hand in his.

The look he gives Anders plainly says 'if you harm her in any fashion, or fuck this up, I'll make you wear your insides', and then his attention is entirely on Pel.

He kisses her knuckles, his other hand moving to gently brush through her hair.

[samahl]

Merrick is too extra to use a door properly, but his arrival means that Cyril can't be close behind. He enters like a regular person though, through the door.

"I think I just heard talk of a cat?" he offered, speaking calmly as if this wasn't one of the biggest days of their lives. "Are you thinking of having one eventually? If so, I can make toys to amuse her. I figured out how to make these little balls that have trinkets inside so it makes a noise as it rolls." He used to make toys for Merrick too, when they were younger. He'll probably do the same for Sina.

[mythalenaste]

Low chuckles from Pel. She touches Merrick's hand when he bristles at Anders; the healer has been her midwife these last nine months, and she would rather there be trust among everyone in this room.

"The Hero of Purrelden would like that. And so will Little Sina, probably. Once she is able to control her fingers."

She glances up at the boys. "I'm glad you're here. Though I'm afraid we're still very early on. Very, very early." She releases Merrick's hand so she can keep eating. "Breakfast is by the fire, if you want it, and I'll not blame you if you take naps. I can't sleep; it doesn't mean you can't."

[justice_is_blond]

As Merrick's not his patient, his act isn't worth Anders' time or notice. He continues leaning back in his chair, rather relaxed. This is what he knows and he's in his element here.

"I've still got the one you made for Purrelden," he says to Cyril, "though not for lack of effort on her part to knock it under everything. And Pel's correct, we've some time yet. Get comfortable. This stage tends to be the longest, so once it's passed things will be moving at a more steady pace."

[dalishious]

Merrick goes about shedding his coat and outer layers, then climbs back into bed with Pel.

He doesn't seem all that interested in idle conversation, but that's to be expected. No matter what happens, he's staying by her side, so he gets ready to be here for however long this takes.

[samahl]

Cyril smiles at the comment about the toy that he made for Purrelden. "I'm glad that it's held up," he says. He had been a little worried that the part that made it jingle might fall out and had been extra careful to craft the ball to stop that. It was good to know that even with an animal batting it around, it had survived.

"Do we have all of the supplies we need?" he asks, looking around. If they are here for the long haul it might be good to make sure of that. "Do we need any more water? Or... anything? I don't mind making a run to the kitchens if needed."

[mythalenaste]

Pel puts an arm around Merrick's neck, cuddling close. She feels like she is floating on this bed of support, these people so ready and eager to help her. She also feels she is going to need it. If she has no support now, she will crumble.

"I might need you to make me cups of tea with sugar every once in a while."

Her expression changes, though it's not so much a matter of looking pained as pained might look on other people. Her brow lowers, her mouth tightens, her eyes go nearly shut. She leans against Merrick heavily, hiding her face as is her custom when she is in distress. It's just a contraction, nothing is going wrong. It doesn't necessarily feel wrong, even. But it's pain like she has never known and she had thought she had been ready for this. But nothing prepared her for how bad it would be.

[justice_is_blond]

"Other than fresh tea, we have everything."

Anders' expression turns a little sympathetic as Pel braces; this part isn't easy on anyone. ...None of it is, really.

"Breathe evenly if you can, Pel. It will help to focus on regularly breathing in and out, because I can't give you anything for the pain just yet." Their systems are too joined. In a few hours baby Sina will be in the birth canal and Anders can offer Pel elfroot if she'd like, but everything's still settling into place.

"And if one of you wants to give her a hand to squeeze, she may appreciate that. Though I'll warn you, it will likely hurt."

[dalishious]

Fear grips Merrick's heart at the sight of her face contorted in pain, and he has to take a deep breath himself as he holds her close and strokes her back.

"Breathe in...and out," he says rhythmically in Elvhen, his low voice close to her ear, repeating those words his father used to say to him when he got frightened during climbing lessons.

[samahl]

Cyril takes Pel's hand the minute that Anders suggests it. "Squeeze as hard as you need, lethallan. I can take it."

They are Dalish, after all. Enduring is part of their culture, and even if all three of them had been rejected from their Clan and family, they still had some aspects drilled into them.

[mythalenaste]

Her eyes were up at the sky when she lay at the mercy of the needle. It came so close to her eyes, and the closer it got, the more painful it was. The tap of the rod against the needle became as ceaseless and senseless as the storm of warm pain. She did not know if it was sweat or blood trickling down her temple. But she would not flinch. She would not cry out. Every part of her conscious aimed at that pain, a shove of defiance, an internal scream. If she could feel every corner of the pain, if she could know it utterly, she would not be afraid of it.

Then the tattooer started on the bridge of her nose, needle against bone, and she realized it had been foolish to believe she could know the borders of pain.

Pel figured contractions would be like monthly cramps, except many times worse. That was foolish. It's not just her womb that is giving birth to this baby, it's her entire body, so her entire body feels it. And the worst is yet to come. There is no finding the edge of this pain and using it for strength. All bets are off, and this is territory she never imagined.

She tries to relax, tries to let her hand lie loose in Cyril's. That doesn't help. It makes her feel more adrift. So her grip quickly goes from limp to crushing. It's the breathing that helps, the rhythm echoing in her ears as Merrick voices it.

In...and out. In...and out.

It's going to be a long night.