[open] now my head's splitting at the seams

[onlyhymns]

WHO: Cade the Disgraced and you!
WHAT: Cade is free (to a point) and around and about Skyhold again. He always has a buddy with him, whether it's Nerva, a Tranquil, or a scout who's been saddled with babysitting duty.
WHEN: Drakonis
WHERE: Skyhold
NOTES: Warning for probable violence and possible other dark shit, depending on how things go.

Cade is miserable, but at least he is not in a cell. Most of the time he is at the whims of whomever is in charge of supervising him, which means a lot of labor, assisting Nerva or Tranquil or scouts, and generally being little more than a manservant or a leashed dog.

He keeps his head low and his tongue still for the most part, but anyone is still free to approach and engage him.

Comments

The night after his hearing

[keeperofmagi]

When she's told that she is to continue supervising Cade, she doesn't argue. Even though some might think it is a burden on her, she knows better - she doesn't trust anyone else fully with this task. At least now she knows his supervision will be seen to properly. So she comes to pick him up with a hard, stony expression, and a bedroll tucked under her arm.

"You will be staying with me for the foreseeable future," She said, bluntly. "Come."

[onlyhymns]

Cade's knees hadn't stopped shaking despite the comparatively merciful result of his hearing. He stepped out looking lost and tired and nervous, a deeper desolation
overtaking him when he realized he was still being paired with Nerva.

It wasn't that he didn't like Nerva. Or at least, hadn't. But at the moment, being at her side was nothing but a symbol of his failure, of which he knew everyone would be reminded every time they were seen together.
Nonetheless, he stepped forward with a sigh.

[keeperofmagi]

"I am not fully aware of your previous habits, Cade, but you will be sticking to a strict regimen for the foreseeable future. No less than 8 hours of sleep, in 24. That means, if you have nightmares, you are to inform me, and we will make up the time. Three full meals a day, and one hour of prayer in the chantry in the morning, and one in the evening. The rest of the day you will be fulfilling your duties as your superiors lay them out for you. Understood?"

[onlyhymns]

This wasn't the worst he was expecting to hear. Anything that could put him in a military mindset was desirable, and having a superior tell him what to do was the ideal scenario. Especially now, when he was so frazzled he probably couldn't even brush his own hair without instructions.
He nodded mildly, keeping his eyes lowered.

[keeperofmagi]

"Good." She turned to walk, making sure he was in step before silently leading them back to her room. Her room was - well - small. very small. It was about the length of the bed, in one direction, and not much wider in the other. The only furniture was the bed itself, and a small table, with a candle, and the few odd pieces that she owned. A couple of books. Carving tools, some ink and paper. It was all very efficiently organized, and spartan. She set the bed roll down on the floor next to her bed.

"You will be staying here until I can arrange proper overnight supervision for you."

[onlyhymns]

Cade followed like a well-trained dog, wishing he could at least will his hands to stop quivering. He folded them up under his arms, his mind everywhere but the present as they made their way toward Nerva's room.
This wasn't a big surprise; they'd shared a tent, after all, and he understood the system they'd likely follow. He nodded his comprehension, looking over the bedroll. He'd had worse.

After a moment, he cleared his throat timidly. "...may I, um... get my things, Ma'am," he asked, head still lowered.

[embracelight]

Belinda is often in a chipper mood, and today she walks around the stronghold, seeing where she might be of help. It seems one of the stable boys fell and sprained his wrist, but there is already a replacement: a blond man who looks like he doesn't want to be bothered. But that has never stopped Belinda from trying to be friendly, so she comes over to where he's working.

"Would you like some help? I'm in want of something to do." Her bright, Starkhaven accent is far too happy for this early in the morning.

[keeperofmagi]

She nodded. "I will accompany you to fetch them," She agreed solemnly. "You may store them here, until such time as proper supervision is found to allow you back into your rooms on a more permanent basis."

She stepped back, gesturing to the door, that he should lead on.

[onlyhymns]

Despite the positive response, Cade paused. He took a breath as though he meant to say something, met Nerva's gaze, and then looked away again, sighing it out and slinking by like a kicked dog. He had approximately a hallway's length to formulate a plan, and with his mind now racing the way it was, that wasn't going to be easy.
About halfway there, he stopped abruptly and turned around. "I-..." he stammered, "I actually... don't need anything. It's fine." His visible nervous energy declared that it wasn't altogether fine, but why it wouldn't be was mysterious.

[keeperofmagi]

The abrupt turnaround - and the nerves - immediately made her suspicious. But she couldn't fathom why. Her immediate thought was something embarassing, but--

"I've lived with Templars all my life," She said bluntly. "I assure you, there is nothing I haven't seen. I am not here to judge you, Cade."

Even if she was suddenly very worried about what could make him so nervous. A secret lyrium stash? A polished wooden phallus? Did she really want to know?

[onlyhymns]

Well, she had seen through at least part of the ruse. Regardless of what she'd seen or not, there were certain things that needed to stay private for the sake of his own sanity. ...and perhaps pride, not that there was a lot of that left.
He stalled for a moment longer, fidgeting anxiously, then forced himself to turn and keep going, with the pace and posture of a condemned man on his way to the gallows.

On the surface, his room was much like Nerva's: bare, clean, nothing out of the ordinary. His agitation only seemed to grow, however, as he stooped to reach under the bed for the neat pile of clothes that he'd stored there. He seemed to hang down there just a second too long, one hand surreptitiously pushing something farther under as he pulled the clothing out and straightened again. All right, done, time to go!! Nothing more to see here.

[onlyhymns]

Chipper is the exact opposite of what Cade feels or wants to be around, but there she is anyway. He looks up at Belinda, initially a bit alarmed that she's approached him so openly and with such friendliness.

"...um," he says, briefly at a loss for words, "..no... no, I've got it." He glances over at the Tranquil overseeing him. She doesn't seem to care in the slightest, though perhaps that's just a Tranquil thing.

[embracelight]

At first, Belinda thought the Tranquil was just there on her own to observe, but with the way Cade looks over at her, she can't help but wonder if they're here in the stables together.

"Hello," she greets the Tranquil politely, and gets a monotone "Greetings," in response. Looking back at Cade, she says, "If you're sure. But would it be all right if I spend a little time in here?"

[lifeofendurance]

So. Aleron has somehow acquired a secretary that he is not accustomed to having. He suspects once his mother finds out, she'll be thrilled. And Ravonild is almost certain to have thoughts about how overdue it is to have a personal manservant. The women can't get it through their heads that his life doesn't allow for what they consider everyday necessities. but he has taken on the task out of a sense of responsibility. Though logically it could be helpful to have someone to pass on more tedious bureaucratic tasks.

Truth be told, having to deal with the tedious bits is a good punishment for Cade's lapse of self-control.

The Seeker is set up at one of the tables in the library with a stack of books for research, not pleasure, at hand. But those are not what he's engrossed in currently. It's a rather substantial stack of letters he's already received that he's only just getting around to going through before starting for the day.

[onlyhymns]

Cade shovels a massive mound of soiled straw into the barrow, then pauses to wipe his brow with his forearm. If there's one thing he hates, it's being dirty; yet here he is, with disgusting smudges all over his face, his arms, the undershirt he's wearing to avoid destroying any clothes he cares about.
All things considered, it's a pretty decent punishment.

"...of course," he says, a bit confusedly, looking around for anyone who might disagree. "I'm... that's not up to me."

[onlyhymns]

Cade has proven himself an obedient servant, if not an especially competent one. He's a bundle of nerves each day, constantly afraid of doing something to upset the Seeker: spelling something wrong, stacking things in the wrong order, speaking out of turn, and so forth.

He arrives in the library to find Aleron, at which point his escort leaves him. Cade looks behind him to watch them go, then inclines his head and presses his fist to his heart in a typical military bow of greeting.

[embracelight]

"Why not?" she inquires, moving over to a rectangular hay bale and seating herself on it. She may be from a noble family, but she's never minded being dirty. Templars sweat plenty in their armor, after all.

[onlyhymns]

Incidentally, so is he; perhaps that explains his aversion to dirt. Perhaps not.

"...because I'm not in charge of the stables," he explains, glancing around furtively as if expecting someone to jump out and admonish him. He turns back to shovel another pile, just in case.

[embracelight]

"But it's you I might be bothering by sitting here," she reasons. "Some people say I talk too much and that I'm bothering them, so I wanted to make sure you wouldn't be bothered." She already knows the Tranquil won't be bothered. Tranquil are never bothered by anything, poor dears.

[onlyhymns]

The fact that anyone is considering his feelings is bewildering enough to Cade, and he looks at the woman like she has two heads. "..I... won't..?" he attempts, looking aside, still waiting for the punchline.

[embracelight]

"Okay," she answers, wondering why he looks so confused by her. She's not rambling, is she?

"I'm Belinda. I've been with the Inquisition for months now, but this is my first time at Skyhold. It's lovely, isn't it?"

[onlyhymns]

Being who he is, and in the life he's had, Cade isn't used to people asking his permission. Or considering his feelings. He feels almost threatened by this.

"...Cade," he answers awkwardly, and glances around. The stable isn't lovely. In fact, everything that has happened since he came to Skyhold has been about as un-lovely as conceivably possible. He thinks about it, then shakes his head with a frown that verges on sulky.

[embracelight]

"No? Well, I suppose the stables aren't the best place to ask that question is it?" She giggles to herself. Sure, the place stinks of horse and poo, but it's a necessary part of the stronghold.

"It's good to meet you, Cade."

[onlyhymns]

Cade can't imagine what is possessing this woman to be so friendly to him, and he can't stop glancing around, waiting for the snickering or the top of someone's head to emerge from behind a hay bale. A few of his fellow knights in training had once bought time with a prostitute for his birthday, but it had always been more for them than for him. How they'd laughed when he'd walked into his chamber, found her there, and left to spend the night in the chapel.
Needless to say, talking to women in a non-military context is not his forte.

"..you too," he says, a bit distantly. He turns away to scrape the shovel against the stone floor, attempting to dislodge some of the packed-in filth that the last person missed.

[embracelight]

Belinda waits a moment to see if he'll say anything else. She can't really determine if he's this taciturn with everyone, or if she really is bothering him. At least he doesn't appear to be a mage. When she asked Rion about his family, he shot an ice spell at her and she got frostbite. She decided she didn't really like him much after that. Words like "None of your business" work so much better than hurting someone.