[Open] Hope is that Beautiful Place, between How Things Were

[sunshinethroughgrey]

WHO: Bethany Hawke and You
WHAT: Trying to convalesce - badly. So just like a Hawke, really.
WHEN: Covering the 22nd of Justinian through the first week of Solace, around her absence from the 24th through the 27th of Justinian for Thorns of the Rose..
WHERE: Library, Warden Camp, Skyhold Courtyard
NOTES: Warnings for graphic violence and cheerful optimism.

It should be noted that Bethany Hawke is a horrible patient.

In fact, it should be noted that all Hawkes are terrible patients. None of them liked to stay in bed if they didn't want to, all of them were more than happy to keep pushing through the pain and illness until they were absolutely exhausted. Bethany herself traveled nearly a week out with the Blight in her veins before she succumbed to the illness.

So imagine just how stubborn she was going to be for a silly gaping chest wound along with cracked ribs.

During the first few days after they had defeated Vengeance were quiet - she couldn't make it out of bed after all. After that -- well. If no one was watching her - she'd make herself all the way to the library to do her research, or out in the Courtyard to knit and read, or tell stories to the children with one hand against her side.

To the healers horror, and aggravation, she even managed to escape their kind attentions long enough to disappear for three days to Fereldan, of all places. She was put back into a cot under dire threats, but she was out again the next day, hobbling across the courtyard to see the mabari puppies and take her own Gamlen out for his walks.

It's not until the first week of Solace, however, that the healers throw up their hands and let her go back to the Warden Camp. She's quieter, for whatever reason, but anyone who seeks her out will find her sunshine smiles and sewing something carefully.

Yet the rare few will find her alone in the woods, her hands to her face, tears sliding down her cheeks that first week of Solace. Tears that will be dashed away if she's caught, and hidden.

Comments

[sunshinethroughgrey]

Sooner or later they'll have to have the talk about the Calling - about the twenty years she has left. Or might have left, but she's going to spend that next twenty years finding a way to survive. She's always been a fighter, in this regard, and she's not going to give up now.

She's afraid of losing people too, but she won't go on like this. She can't. She doesn't think it's good for Aleron either. Not to know that someone cares about him, that someone might want him. That someone was her, and even though she was scared to death she was not going to back away from what she said. No more running. No more running from herself, most importantly of all.

Her smile was slow, but it was warm, and bright, and then she stated quietly, "Don't be a moron, Aleron. You're definitely someone worth caring about. Especially a man who can hold a woman when she's crying just because she asked him to."

Her jaw tightened, closing her eyes, before she wrapped her arms around him more tightly and held on. "I don't want you to go. So ... don't go."

[lifeofendurance]

Ah her smiles. Aleron might be slow to recognize the signs of female interest, but he's quite adept at noticing other details, great and small. He's seen Bethany's smiles fall like drops of sunshine, warming everything and everyone around her. They even possess a mystical ability to pull almost smiles out of him in turn. Like now, as the corners of his mouth raise just a fraction. "Not just because you asked me to. Maker help me, I've wanted to again since I was helping you with your staff practice."

It's difficult for him to admit such a thing, as it treads into the waters of him acknowledging he has wants and needs beyond the mere execution of duty. But honest has been bred into him and honed as a core of his being. Even if this makes him a bumbling fool making such admissions, he would have them be no other way with each other.

When she clings all the tighter to him, all the fear and hesitation seem worthwhile. He would have her happy rather than grieved, but he cannot help appreciate that it's flung her into his arms. There is a quiet sense of peace and contentment that settles into his bones, that this feels right. Matters of rank or responsibility or even magic do not factor into his thoughts beyond a strange and unfamiliar feeling of happiness. That has long been absent in his life and he welcomes its return.

Greedy to keep her close, to hold on to this soft woman who beats down his walls with kindness and warm smiles, he nuzzles his cheek against her head where he's laid it. Eventually they will have to go back. But not yet. Not yet.

"I'll stay."

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Her smile dimpled deep for him, her eyes brightening. She can see the corners of his mouth lifting up, that sweet, almost boyish shyness of his. Yet it was a smile that reached all the way to his eyes. That particular confession, however, brought a flush to her cheeks, and her fingers stopped gripping and instead, swept in a faint caress. Nothing untoward, just ... unstoppable fondness.

Which was all she really had for this man. Unstoppable, all the way through. She tucked her head down against his chest once more. "I like that you want to hold me. I like holding you too - and I ... I have wanted to hold you as long as you have wanted to hold me."

So there, she can admit that too. She can admit that she's felt this - attraction, warmth, caring for quite some time. She sweeps her fingers up and down again, her voice soft, "So ... we've agreed that we care about one another, and we agree we like holding one another. We've agreed we're both going to stay. So ... ah ... "

She wasn't sure if she should be asking if they should court, or go on walks, or ask if she was going to be his beau or. Oh gracious.

[lifeofendurance]

"So..."

Impulsive has never been a word used to describe Aleron a day in his life. Everything he's ever done has been the result of long and careful study before taking action. Not even one lick of the antics he was blamed for as a boy had been his idea; he'd been trying to save Ravonild from herself and her impulses.

Yet Bethany is here now, all sweetness with dimples in her cheeks and eyes shining where there had been tears earlier. He can hear himself in his head, talking to Malcolm about the regrets he held that he'd allowed duty to chisel away every moment he could have, should have, spent cherishing his wife. He's done squandering time with someone who deserves his complete attention and devotion. He could not live with himself if he offered her anything less than what he had to give. Aleron was never going to be a man to engage in a casual dalliance and she is too precious and dear for one.

His mind is made up quickly and decisively. One hand reaches up to take hold of hers where it's been on his face, fingers curling around only enough to keep it where she's placed it. "I'd like to seek permission to court you. To whom should I apply?"

This is impulsive for him. Marvel at its rarity. Though he's still terrible about expressing himself and the roiling waves of affection he's been smothering and ignoring for months. Still afraid she might change her mind, he adds a quiet whispered plea, "Please tell me that I may."

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"I ... Oh Maker.."

Well, now he's gone and made her speechless. So much that she pulls away to look him in the eyes and yes, he is utterly serious. So serious and so afraid that she would say anything else but 'Oh yes, please.'

Her fingers curled around his cheek - she could feel faint bristles under her fingertips and feel the warmth of his skin. It almost matched the hopeful warmth in his gaze. His hand, around hers, capturing her in place. Her smile softened, as did her eyes, as she whispered, "Of course you may."

A pause while she flushed again, and then leaned in to kiss his cheek quickly then away again. She wouldn't dare anything more, but a hint of mischief touched her gaze, "You would have to speak to the Champion of Kirkwall first -- but since not even the Inquisition can find her now ... a letter to Carver, I think, and - yes. Nathaniel and Aveline should do nicely for application."

Dimples flashed, "And to whom should I be applying?"

[lifeofendurance]

Despite hoping against all hope that she'd agree to a courtship, Aleron has so little belief in his own prospects, that he's surprised when he hears Bethany agree. He stands there mute, gawking at Bethany and admiring her bright eyes while he allows her agreement to sink in. Finally realization reaches him and his expression morphs from hopeful and afraid to relief coupled with a genuine and pleased smile.

Just as that happiness registers for him, Bethany is kissing his cheek. That pleasant gesture leaves his cheek tingling and his neck burning hot for the unexpected thrill it provides. He is quite and intensely aware of feeling the absence of her body snuggled up against his which fuels further blushing to rise. She's only just agreed to let him court her, craving more intimate touching is inappropriate yet the desire lingers.

"Aveline and Nathaniel and a letter to your brother. I will do it immediately." That seems almost too easy to him. Although if she'd demanded he follow through on finding the Champion to get permission he would have headed out today to begin the search. For that matter, if she wanted him to march back into the Fade and right up to the gates of the Black City to receive blessing from the Maker himself, he would do it. For the good or ill it implies, Aleron is the sort to devote himself to a task laid out before him without wavering.

Her question he takes just as seriously, giving it all the careful consideration it is due. "Ravonild must be consulted as she remains the head of the household. And my mother." An argument could be made he's a grown man, once married already, and seeking either of their permission to court is silly but he's determined to do everything properly. "Lady Pentaghast is the senior Seeker, therefore she is the Lady Seeker until the next Divine can appoint whom she chooses from our ranks."

Maker, what in the world is he even doing? Suggesting Bethany go petitioning the Right Hand of the Divine for courtship permissions? Aleron pauses, shakes his head, then turns over Bethany's hand to place a chaste kiss on the top. "You need not do that. I will attend to them as well."

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Honestly, could he be any more adorable and charming? She really didn't think so. Not with that astonished and brilliant smile, all in one. She would definitely have to put in the work to get him to smile like that more often, and believe that she did care, she did want him, and she was also here to stay.

She dimples again, before she nods her head. "I'll give you Carver's latest address, and ... well I will leave you to find Nathaniel and Aveline on your own." Oh, she can't wait to hear about that conversation. Her smile softened at the serious look on his face, and then him trying to take over all the 'asking permission' duties.

Probably didn't help her protest that she flushed red at that chaste kiss, before she cleared her throat, "You'll do no such thing. I'll write to your mother, and your sister." She paused for a moment, thinking about Cassandra, "... The Lady Seeker I might wait on for a week or two. Soften her up with pastries."

She stepped up closer to him, looking up at him shyly. "So, you know, we're in this together. Courting and all."