Ebasit Ben-Hassrath maraas-toh, tal-eb iss mer-toh ari-van.

[issala]

WHO: Kas, Korrin, Gorse, Taashath + possible eavesdroppers
WHAT: Kas is scared and spreads the fear
WHEN: 4th of Firstfall
WHERE: Skyhold
NOTES: Possibly language, anxiety, 'Bull is an evil spy' hijinks Edit: Unapologetic bandit slaughtering

The teen had tried to keep it a secret for a while, frightened of what would happen if he opened his mouth about it. Even if Krem had tried to calm him by saying the Chargers wouldn't stand for their boss slaughtering the qunari here, Kas knew better. If this 'Iron Bull' got orders, he'd do it, and Krem might not even know about it until they were all dead or missing.

The longer he waited, however, the worse his nightmares were getting, and so where the blackouts where he'd find himself in new areas of the castle with his heart beating painfully in his chest. It had been a while since that had been acting up, so the stress couldn't be good for him at all.

He had to get it off his chest; he had to tell Gorse, and Korrin. Maybe the big Tal-Vashoth guy, too. He couldn't leave them in danger just because he was scared.

...so he finally heads off, grabbing his new daggers and the bow he was still borrowing, and hurries to find them. They had to know. The Ben-Hassrath were here!

Comments

[issala]

"Yeah... that's him." Kas replies, trying to not squirm too much at the very name of this guy. Who was he under the Qun? Not the Iron Bull, obviously.

"I was talking to Krem. That's his lieutenant. I met him in the sparring ring because he was swinging that maul around and that was really awesome." It's a bittersweet experience, now. The teen takes a deep breath, looking up at Gorse. "He told me that the guy's not Tal-Vashoth."

He's still scared to even say it out loud, quickly looking around them to make sure nobody was listening in. As far as the boy could see, however, there was nothing but hay and moving horses in their stalls.

"He's Ben-Hassrath, Gorse!"

[savethecat]

Gorse goes very quiet as the words Ben-Hassrath come out of Kas' mouth.

Ben-Hassrath, the enforcers, the secret police, the ones who do what Needs To Be Done According to the Qun. He knew a little about them, from what his parents told him. A little more than some, considering they were able to give him first-hand information. They didn't want to scare their son after all, just impress upon him the importance and danger involved. Possibly not to him, as a Vashoth he was a low priority if one at all. Someone could get over-eager though, decide to take matters into their own hands, decide that Gorse would be a good source of information on where to find Tal-Vashoth they hunted.

Okay, so they were sharing a camp with a Ben-Hassrath.

He hadn't done anything yet, as far as Gorse knew, in spite of ample opportunity to turn over the Vashoth and Tal-Vashoth here. They had all been alone enough, Gorse knew he was trusting enough. Taas would of course be the primary target of the four of them if there were any and he was fine, Gorse had seen him earlier that day. If Krem knew and was willing to tell Kas, he'd bet buttons to boots that the higher ups in the Inquisition knew ... so they were either working with the Qun or didn't mind his being a Ben-Hassrath. Maybe there were caveats involved in his joining to do with that. Safe money was on a few Vashoth not being a priority at all to whatever mission The Iron Bull was on. Not now anyway, but like the wind that could always change with the passing of a minute.

He was afraid, of course he was afraid, in a sort of distant way that comes with not ever truly having to be afraid and being unaccustomed to the feeling. More of a concern to him though was Kas' anxiety, his panic. Gorse was a big brother and raised to help others before anything else.

This only took a few moments to run through his mind before he kneeled down to be more at eye level with Kas.

"Thank you for telling me. Do Korrin and Taas know yet?" Gorse asked, voice calm and even. First things first, assess the danger involved. If they didn't know then he'd have to find them.

[issala]

The teen is pale, shaking a little bit as Gorse goes through the information. Nights of nightmares had left their traces on the boy, and he looks at the older qunari when the man finally kneels down to talk to him.

"Y-yeah. I told Korrin and she's gonna talk to the big guy. She told me to tell you we're gonna look out for each other." That makes him smile, just a little bit between the worry and the fear.

Then his face falls again and he's fighting the fear once more. he refuses to cry about it. He's an adult. A man. men did not cry just because they were scared shitless.

"...I thought this place was gonna be full of good people."

[savethecat]

Gorse just wants to hug Kas, and it takes everything he's got to not do that. The boy spooked too easily before at casual touch and now he was already upset, Gorse didn't want to make things worse.

"Hey, we are gonna look out for each other, alright? Nothing bad's gonna happen if we stick together." Gorse assured Kas with an encouraging smile. "... Could be he's still a good person. Hard to have a chance to show it when you don't know you got options. Maybe his lieutenant was wrong, too. Momma said it's awful hard for outsiders to learn qunlat, he might have been mishearing it for something else. We'll get this sorted either way though, there's nothing to worry about."

He held out his hand to Kas in offering. If the boy didn't want to take it, that was fine, all Gorse could do is leave the option available for him.

[issala]

Gorse has a nice voice. It's calm and kind and good. Kas wants to just shut everything out and listen to it, to stop this stupid shaking, the dumb tears burning behind his eyes, the wild thunder of his heart hammering against his chest.

But he can't.

"They killed my mom... they killed my mom, Gorse! They killed my mom and my kith and I only got away because I hid!" He squeaks, voice cracking pathetically. "They can't be nice people, it isn't possible, you don't understand. They hunt and they kill or they take you back."

His pale blue eyes fall on that offered hand and he bites his lip. He wants to take it, he really does - but he's already being so weak, so stupid. "I just don't want that to happen again."

[savethecat]

"It's okay to be scared, Kas. Everyone gets scared and cries sometimes, everyone. I promise you though, it won't happen again." Gorse said with the same sureness as before, the same gentle voice. He didn't take back the offered hand yet, either. "We're gonna look out for you, and we're gonna look out for each other. S'what friends are for, and we're friends."

[issala]

"I..." The boy isn't sure what to say. Gorse keeps being kind and gentle, calling him a friend, and something breaks inside the teen.

He takes that hand, and then he's just burying himself into that shoulder like it's the most important thing in the world.

'It's okay to be scared. Everyone gets scared and cries sometimes.'

Well, he better be damn right about that.

[savethecat]

Gorse doesn't say anything he doesn't believe, at least to a certain extent. Everyone cries, has cried, and if they claim they don't or you've never seen it then it's just because they're better at hiding it.

He's seen the tears his parents have shed when they thought he wasn't looking.

Gorse's other arm comes up around Kas's shoulders when the boy presses his face into one of Gorse's broad shoulders. It's as tight a hug he can give while still making sure it's clear that the hold is one Kas can break away from at any moment if he suddenly feels too trapped or too self-conscious.

"Shhh, it's okay Kas, it's gonna be alright. Nothin's gonna happen to you, nothin's gonna happen to any of us. It's gonna be alright." he murmured, letting him hide his tears in Gorse's shirt as long as he needed.

[issala]

Poor Gorse's shirt was getting wet with tears from nights of worry and fear. The Ben-Hassrath were dangerous, efficient... and very good at creating a sleeper agent, frightening the boy thoroughly so his fear would disarm any suspicions.

There were no lies in the upper layer. Every shudder was real, every half-choked sob from his heart.

The arm around Kas' shoulder is tolerated for the sake of the warmth and strange comfort it gave - and when the teen finally pulls back, he's trying to wipe at puffy eyes discretely.. "T-thanks."

[savethecat]

Gorse produced a handkerchief from one of his pockets to hold out to Kas, removing his arm from the boy when he pulled away. It was a success to get even that brief bit of contact but he wished the circumstances had been better.

"Everyone cries, everyone gets scared. Specially after living through the kinda stuff you lived through." Gorse said, gently. "You were able to find and warn us even though you were scared, that's very brave, Kas."

[issala]

He glares a bit at the handkerchief but takes it to wipe tears and snot off his face. It comes off kind of dirty, but he had been doing a lot of work lately. Now he hit the dummy 60% of the time when he did his archery training. Things had been looking up for him, which was why this had crippled his progress. Fear and nightmares was holding him back.

"I dunno if it's brave. I just... I don't want anything to happen to you guys," he says with a sigh. "I haven't been around other qunari for some time and it just... I like it. So it's kinda selfish."

[savethecat]

"I think it's brave." Gorse insisted. Still, if Kas has enough sass in him to glare and argue Gorse is relieved - it means he's calmed at least a little bit from before. Gorse still needed to get to the bottom of this, needed to check on Taas and Korrin as well just for his own peace of mind, but he didn't want to leave Kas on his own when the boy was feeling like he was.

[issala]

Brave, selfish, whatever. Kas sighs again, crossing his arms over his chest and biting his lip just slightly. He doesn't want to leave, but he has training to do, and at least that would take his mind off things for a moment. If he was doing archery practice, he had a chance to shoot down a charging Ben-Hassrath, right?

...but after that. After that, there would be nothing but fear again.

"Um... where do you stay at night? If... um... y'know, if I need to get your or something..." Totally not because he wants to sleep in the same room or anything.

[savethecat]

"Wherever there's free space," Gorse admitted, which meant it moved, sometimes nightly. Still, he thought he had an idea of what Kas might be getting at...

"How about I come find you when it's getting time to bunk down for the night and we stick close, that way if something does happen that's less running around before we gotta find everyone?"

[issala]

Kas does his best to not look dejected at that, shrugging as if it meant nothing. Of course he moved around! It made sense, after all. He was a herbalist, not one of the scouts of soldiers that stayed in the barracks.

Gorse's idea takes some of the tension out of his posturing, though, and the teen nods awkwardly. "That could work, I guess." Please, please work. He didn't want to be alone, even if he had a bedroll with his name on it in with the other scouts. He didn't know them, and they couldn't understand his fear.

Only other qunari could.

[savethecat]

"I think I'd feel better sleeping with someone else around, too." Gorse said. Also, he took up quite a bit of room being as big as he was and space was kind of at a premium... he'd look into the barracks and whatnot when the rest of Skyhold wasn't held together with scaffolding and spit.

"Are you going to be okay for a while? I'm sure you've got a lot to do, I want to check on Korrin and Taas. You can come with me if you'd like, though."

[issala]

Kas didn't care if they so had to sleep in the ramparts, as long as they had eachother's backs. Blight, maybe even round up the others and have a qunari pile. Then again... it would make it easier for someone to take them all out in one big sweep, so maybe not.

"I gotta go to training... but..." The teen pauses, looking at Gorse and setting his jaw in a more stubborn look. "No, I'll be good. There's lotsa people around." He rubs the back of his head and then tries a more confident approach.

"Go talk to them. I'll learn to shoot while you're at it!"

[savethecat]

Gorse smiles as Kas's determination sets in.

"Good, you'll be great at it. Then you can look out for all of us."

Standing, Gorse resisted the urge to ruffle Kas's hair. Already he'd gotten a hug out of the kid, that was quite a bit.

[issala]

The kid gives a stern nod at that, taking it in like a personal goal. Become strong. Protect everyone. He could do that... that hug had helped more than he'd realized, easing a bit of the fright inside him and making way for the stubbornness. Despite his prickly demeanor, Kas was starved for affection.

"Say hi to Korrin from me when you see her, yeah?" The teen calls out as he turns to leave, giving Gorse a slight thumbs up after wiping his face again with his sleeve. He refused to show up at practice all flushed and red-eyed, after all.

[savethecat]

Gorse nodded, waving as Kas ran off. He stayed where he was until the teen was out of sight.

He was concerned, of course, but danger was a strange thing, always just beyond the horizon. He didn't really know how to properly respond to it.

He'd talk to Taas and Korrin and feel better, surely.