In this she has points. He's even said some of this to Nathaniel, that he doesn't know if any would work with him, and started the conversation with this point. He sighs, still a tiny bit tense.
"I know all of this. Minus the everyone lacking part, that is, though I should have known. I don't know that one will work with me in the first place. I know that people will worry, and they will watch me... but they will watch me regardless. And a full half of the Mage Council cannot even stand to look at me as it is; I can't consider them as there is nothing I can do short of dying that they would approve of."
Really, they'd prefer he crossed a line and was executed. But he doesn't need to dwell on that.
"I know my errors. I can make an agreement safely. But I cannot say that any would care for me. I've gone through all I can think of, and with Nate's help there may be potential with Perseverance or, less likely, Mercy." There's insecurity in the way he says the latter, as if she might laugh at that one. It is dangerously close to laughable.
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"I know all of this. Minus the everyone lacking part, that is, though I should have known. I don't know that one will work with me in the first place. I know that people will worry, and they will watch me... but they will watch me regardless. And a full half of the Mage Council cannot even stand to look at me as it is; I can't consider them as there is nothing I can do short of dying that they would approve of."
Really, they'd prefer he crossed a line and was executed. But he doesn't need to dwell on that.
"I know my errors. I can make an agreement safely. But I cannot say that any would care for me. I've gone through all I can think of, and with Nate's help there may be potential with Perseverance or, less likely, Mercy." There's insecurity in the way he says the latter, as if she might laugh at that one. It is dangerously close to laughable.