faderift | ( open ) like some child possessed, the beast howls in my veins

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( open ) like some child possessed, the beast howls in my veins

WHO: Ruby Lucas & open.
WHAT: Following the events of the missing shard bearer plot (here) Ruby insists on being taken to the dungeons and held there until she is fully detoxed from lyrium.
WHEN: From a gently timey-wimey point in mid-September to early October, at least. She may be in the dungeons longer, depends a bit.
WHERE: THE DUNGEONS, Skyhold.
NOTES: Rumours page & OOC report details, although the latter is more likely pertinent to people who were on the mission/were told about the mission directly/the advisors than general gossip. Alsi new cr is welcome! Ruby's info sheet is here.
WARNINGS: Horror themes! Reference to the events of the shard bearer plot, which include the Wolf attacking and eating people, forced lyrium ingestion, hallucinations, death, violence, torture.

She’s never forgotten that she’s a monster, that the people of Storybrooke had been ready to take up arms against her. Ruby Lucas wasn’t the sweet girl who remembered your coffee order and fixed you whiskey neat from the top shelf on a bad day. She was a vicious, wild thing. The Big Bad Wolf.

After the mission she told them to kill her or shackle her, and when she arrived back to Skyhold she refused to go to the medical tents. It wasn’t worth the risk - keep her locked up, keep her cloak bound across her throat so she couldn’t pull it away during a delirium. She had to stay in at least a month, she had to try and keep people safe.

The first two weeks she’s still recovering from her injuries and the lyrium is still distorting her memories and thoughts and what she sees, leaves her with a constant thirst and the unhealthy pallor in her skin is obvious. Treating the injuries will be ongoing, but the first week she sleeps almost constantly, and the second she is struggling with memories. If people visit during this time there is ever chance of her mind taking flashes from other people’s memories though she can’t make sense of much of anything.

After that she can be found in different states.

She might sit on the floor with her hands through the bars, putting together the most basic, non-volatile components and mechanisms for traps, setting then all in a box to be taken to the Requisition officer.

She might be standing with rotten fruit sliding down the side of her face and splattered across her clothes, perfectly still. Either the guard just hauled the offending fruit thrower who posed as a visitor out, or they might have been distracted by another job so the produce producers are there to be chased off. Unless your character would throw fruit? But then they might be hauled away.
(Note: probably only two of this one unless we work something particular out, just because I don’t want to undermine the efficiency of the Inquisition’s guards at protecting prisoners, even willing ones.)

Ruby may have stripped down some and be treating her wounds and attempting to change dressings and apply poultices, because healers shouldn’t have to go into her cell, as far as she’s concerned. Vicious puncture wounds dot her skin, perfect circular marks that are mostly uniform, but vary in size here and there. There is a jagged gash over her ribs and a burn across the other side, which make her hiss as she tries to pull the rank dressing away.

Or maybe she’s just sitting or lying down on her side, defeated and curled inward.

Wildcards welcome, pick your own location-limited adventure and give me an idea of timeframe/if you are okay with Ruby picking up memories or not if it’s set during the first couple of weeks.

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Wolf noses, all the better for smelling cookies with. Although she's at the front of the cell, she scoots forward a little more to get a better look at who it is coming down the stairs, and smiles ruefully when she spots Jamie. People have been so— patient, and kind, for the most part, patient and kind in ways she didn't expect and certainly in ways she didn't deserve. She figured - hoped? clung desperately to the idea? - that Jamie wasn't here because he couldn't me, rather than because he wouldn't be. It means that when she sees him, registers it properly, she's both very relieved and filled with a certain amount of dread.

"Even if I'm down here, I can still be useful."

The motions are small, ones that she's done over and over enough by now that she doesn't need to look. More time to practice her Artificer skills, at least. "It's good to see you."

"It's good to see you too."

He means it. Despite everything, he doesn't blame Ruby for what's happened, and the only reason he hasn't been here before is because he's been stuck recovering himself. It means he gives her a smile - and then lifts his hand to offer out the cloth-covered package.

"Here. I brought you some biscuits. Er, the sort you'd call cookies. I'm afraid I couldn't manage chocolate ones, but the shortbread's not so bad here. Hope it'll do. They said it'd be alright since you...well, they'd not said exactly, but I got the impression you've been here awhile."

Edited 2016-09-24 02:58 (UTC)

"Hope it'll do?" she echoes, with a bemused kind of fondness. "I'm a jailbird. I'm happy with bread and whatever thing they're calling a stew." Which is to say that she's delighted, or would be normally - right now everything is kind of muted. Slowly, she reaches out to accept the parcel, expression flickering in one of those painful, complicated kind of ways. "Thank you."

And she means it, and she just hopes it comes across, because she's struggling, she thinks, to convey much of anything right now.

"Going to be down here until... I think until the middle of Harvestmere. Maybe longer. I don't... I don't want to risk hurting anyone else. You saw what the Wolf can do."

There's a faint trace of worry in his eyes, a result of managing to catch those few seconds where her expression shifts so - and when she goes to take the package from him, he tries to catch her fingers with his own if he can. Not for long, but if he can manage it, it's just long enough to give her a brief squeeze that's meant to be comforting. Whether or not it is, well...at least the intention is there.

"You're welcome."

He gives her a small smile before pulling back a tiny bit - but he winds up still close enough that his hands can still be reached through the bars if need be, a willingness to trust her even after everything that's happened. But there's still that trace of worry in his eyes, mixing with the serious expression settles back in after the smile.

"Aye, I did. But...wasn't the lyrium the cause of that? They've said that it wears off eventually, and I know I feel myself again."

More or less, anyway, but that probably wouldn't help matters if he says that, so he doesn't.

"Surely there's got to be some other option other than you being locked up in some dank cell again."

She appreciates it, the contact, even if it surprises her. It's oddly grounding, helps her feel more human. So far the only person she's let in the cage with her (read: who has insisted on being let in the cell) is Adelaide, and contact beyond that has been limited, for good reason. She squeezes back, weakly and belatedly, but a definite action.

"It was the lyrium," she agrees. And the silver, and the pain, and the Wolf striking out to protect itself, though she doesn't mention that. Cant, really, when all of them went through so much. She doesn't know how to talk to the people who didn't go through it, because how do you tell your loved ones about something so terrible, and she doesn't talk to the people who were there, because she caused them more suffering, as well.

"I just— I'm so scared that if the lyrium stays in my system, or if it changed some part of me and I'm not in control any more. You hear things about what that stuff does, and how it can change people." She shakes her head, and nudges the package open in a desperate bid to derail herself from that line of thought.

"Aye, I've heard the stories, too." Not to mention hearing the worry over what can happen, something that he remembers all too well from his recent conversation with Hermione. Still, he shakes his head, denying that it's going to be a long term problem. "That was the red lyrium, though, not the stuff they used on us. And there's people here who've had the regular stuff and they're perfectly fine. I've seen Adelaide take wee blue potions before and I daresay you'd have noticed if there was something off there."

Under other circumstances, he might have tried to tease her a little bit about Adelaide, but now wasn't the time for that. Instead, he goes quiet for a moment, looking at her with a serious expression - but one that has a touch of empathy in it as well.

"Look, I'm not saying that it's not a good idea to be a wee bit cautious right now. I've- well, let's just say you're not the only one who's been wondering if they've still got control of themselves right now." His eyes flick down to his hand for a moment, his mouth pressing together the tiniest amount at the green glow there before he closes his fingers over it and looks back up again. "Believe me, I understand why you want to do this. You're still my friend, though, and if there's anything I can do to help, I will. You know that, right?"

Taking a piece of shortbread, Ruby turns the parcel a little so Jamie can more easily reach them, taking a small bite as she listens. She feels like that's the way all of them might have to keep living for a while: taking everything in small pieces so they don't feel overwhelmed. She's not sure that's a luxury they can afford in a war, but it's a nice thought in theory. Even good things like shortbread approached with a healthy, respectful kind of care.

It's not the best comparison, because her stomach's capacity to handle shortbread is probably less of a concern than her ability to deal a high pressure mission but probably flawed metaphors are forgivable. (When he mentions Adelaide it coaxed a smile out of her, even if it's a very small one. The slight cant of her head and the momentary quirk of her brow says probably, yeah.)

"Thank you." She can't assure him that she did know, because her mind is so full of doubts and her chest feels heavy with the very weight of all that has come to pass. Gently, she sets her hand over his shard hand, resting it lightly against the fingers curled toward the palm. "Like you said. We'll get through this, and... we'll help each other." Ruby has to pause, weighing her words to try and figure out her words and wrestle with the thoughts behind them. "I think there might be parts if this that I don't want to ever talk about, and don't ever want to think about, but I think being around people who understand what it was will help." Her words feel strange and stilted to her, even if they don't odd spoken aloud. "I'm her for you, too. We're— we'll get through it."

For the others, she'll get through it. She'll believe that can, even if she's not sure about herself, in the moment.

More than likely it's something they won't be able to manage for long at all, given the war, but it's still a nice thought. And the shortbread's quite nice, too, as he found out earlier when testing it. Testing, of course, being a polite way of saying that he may have filched a piece or two for himself while waiting for it to cool down enough to bring to her.

That doesn't mean that he'll turn down the chance for more, but it is meant to be for her, which means that for once he only takes a smallish piece, content enough to leave the rest for her, or Adelaide the next time she comes for a visit or whatever Ruby decides she wants to do with the rest of the batch. His expression is serious, however, as is the nod he gives her when she manages to get out at least part of what she's trying to say.

"Aye, I know that. And...I know what it's like to have things that've happened that you don't want to talk about. Or think about, for that matter."

A lot of what happened at Culloden is like that, for him - and there may be some parts from all of this that might wind up being the same too. For Ruby, who's wound up with the worst experiences out of this whole thing? It makes sense to want to keep some things to herself. While he's more than willing to listen if she ever needs it, it's her choice what she wants to do in the end. He'll respect that choice, and not push. But he can, and does, curl his hand around hers without hesitation, letting the gesture speak for itself before going on.

"You've my promise that you can come visit me whenever you need it, and we'll not talk together, just be there for each other. Think that'll do us both some good." There's the briefest of pauses, then he adds, a touch more lightly, "Of course, I could always teach you to play the pipes, mind, but I might have to do a wee bit of talking if that's the case."

"The bagpipes?"

Does she sound terribly incredulous? She might sound terribly incredulous. Quietly delighted, definitely, but let's not forget the incredulity. "Are you sure you want to do that? I mean, I've never learned to play an instrument, and there's probably a good reason for that."

Her tone is still not quite herself; not so energetic or bouncy, though this has certainly coaxed a little more spirit back into her. Bagpipes, seriously. Best thing she's heard in a while, that's for sure. Despite everything, she huffs out a quiet laugh. "I mean, I guess even if I'm really bad I'll be a way to drown out anyone trying to talk to me about it all." It's a moment that she doesn't quite know, once she's said it, whether to categorise as amused or sad. Both, perhaps.

"Hey, if you do need to talk about what happened? Or want to? I'm here for you. I'll listen. You don't have to be silent, at all. Okay? My being quiet doesn't mean you have to be."

It's not the first time that someone's sounded terribly incredulous when he's brought up the pipes - not by a long shot - but there's another note in her voice that makes him think that she's actually not all that terribly opposed, either, and a hint of a grin plays around his mouth.

"Aye, I'm sure. Skyhold won't know what's hit them."

And if even the mention of that is enough to get her sounding a little bit more like herself, then maybe learning will help more. He's not expecting everything to be same as it was before, mind. He knows that it won't be. But if it helps Ruby even a little, he's glad to do it...even if he winds up scratching at the back of his head briefly at the rest of it.

"Look, Ruby, I know you're here for me. Only, you know how you said before there's parts you might not want to talk about? There's- aye, well, let's just say there's some things I need to cope with on my own. It'd be easier for me to talk to you about why I'm offering to teach you the pipes, I think."

She nods, and her gaze says that she understands. Understands, worries, sympathises, a whole list of things that are a little too meshed together to really run through easily. "How about we stick to pipes, then. Maybe someday we'll even be able to play a duet?"

The offer's been made, and it stands, and given how she feels she has no idea to push anything at someone who might feel even remotely similar.

And she manages to get a little more of a smile. "Maybe we can trade. You can teach me pipes and I'll teach you how to brew schnapps, or something. Possibly wind up dragging you into my little side project."

"We'll have to order you a set from Starkhaven. Maybe when you're ready we can ask Adelaide. She was the one who got me mine to start with."

Hey, maybe she'd even be alright with having Ruby learning to play - although maybe not so much if she winds up practicing around her. Jamie may not be all that successful when it comes to getting a relationship going, but even he knows that practicing piping is probably not something most lovers would want to hear. At least not all the time, anyway.

But it seems that there's an alternative to that, and there's a flicker of curiosity that appears the word 'schnapps' and doesn't disappear, even with word 'dragged' brought into play.

"What side project would you be meaning, then?"

That makes her smile brighten a little. "For sure. Don't think I won't!"

Learning the bagpipes, God. Maybe she'd be better at learning the bagpipes than at learning to cook or knit - the prior she'd just about gotten a handle on, but the latter? Yikes. It was possible that it was Granny's teaching methods that were the problem, thought it was was probably best not to go there.

A little breath, and she takes a second to organise her thoughts. Everything is still so shuffled and messed up from where it was meant to be. "I made some schnapps for that snow fight a while back. Team Spirits, it was... a pretty lame idea, honestly." She shakes her head, a little sheepish. "Adelaide liked them, though, and figured maybe if I could produce enough of them that they could sell, maybe make a profit. Make enough of a profit, and then maybe it could be a way for rifters to raise some funds for ourselves, you know? Not be a burden on the Inquisition, be a little bit more independent, that kinda thing."

That said: "And I wanted to be able to make some mixed drinks from home, actually."

Ruby's welcome to take as much time as she needs to get her thoughts organized. Heaven only knows that his have been just as scrambled and disjointed, although that does seem to be getting better as time goes on. Once she does, though, he listens, slightly puzzled at first - but then he gets what she's saying, and the look of realization that crosses his face is not only sudden but visible enough that it's quite possibly obvious even from a few feet away.

"Oh aye, I see! It'd be a way for the rifters that help to be able to make some sort of a living here eventually assuming you can get it to work out. Just with some extra benefits, that's all."

And if those benefits are ones that remind her of home, well...that's not so bad, really.

"So are you thinking just schnapps, then, or something else?"

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( open ) like some child possessed, the beast howls in my veins

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