( open ) like some child possessed, the beast howls in my veins

[eviscerates]

WHO: Ruby Lucas & open.
WHAT: Following the events of the missing shard bearer plot (here) Ruby insists on being taken to the dungeons and held there until she is fully detoxed from lyrium.
WHEN: From a gently timey-wimey point in mid-September to early October, at least. She may be in the dungeons longer, depends a bit.
WHERE: THE DUNGEONS, Skyhold.
NOTES: Rumours page & OOC report details, although the latter is more likely pertinent to people who were on the mission/were told about the mission directly/the advisors than general gossip. Alsi new cr is welcome! Ruby's info sheet is here.
WARNINGS: Horror themes! Reference to the events of the shard bearer plot, which include the Wolf attacking and eating people, forced lyrium ingestion, hallucinations, death, violence, torture.

She’s never forgotten that she’s a monster, that the people of Storybrooke had been ready to take up arms against her. Ruby Lucas wasn’t the sweet girl who remembered your coffee order and fixed you whiskey neat from the top shelf on a bad day. She was a vicious, wild thing. The Big Bad Wolf.

After the mission she told them to kill her or shackle her, and when she arrived back to Skyhold she refused to go to the medical tents. It wasn’t worth the risk - keep her locked up, keep her cloak bound across her throat so she couldn’t pull it away during a delirium. She had to stay in at least a month, she had to try and keep people safe.

The first two weeks she’s still recovering from her injuries and the lyrium is still distorting her memories and thoughts and what she sees, leaves her with a constant thirst and the unhealthy pallor in her skin is obvious. Treating the injuries will be ongoing, but the first week she sleeps almost constantly, and the second she is struggling with memories. If people visit during this time there is ever chance of her mind taking flashes from other people’s memories though she can’t make sense of much of anything.

After that she can be found in different states.

She might sit on the floor with her hands through the bars, putting together the most basic, non-volatile components and mechanisms for traps, setting then all in a box to be taken to the Requisition officer.

She might be standing with rotten fruit sliding down the side of her face and splattered across her clothes, perfectly still. Either the guard just hauled the offending fruit thrower who posed as a visitor out, or they might have been distracted by another job so the produce producers are there to be chased off. Unless your character would throw fruit? But then they might be hauled away.
(Note: probably only two of this one unless we work something particular out, just because I don’t want to undermine the efficiency of the Inquisition’s guards at protecting prisoners, even willing ones.)

Ruby may have stripped down some and be treating her wounds and attempting to change dressings and apply poultices, because healers shouldn’t have to go into her cell, as far as she’s concerned. Vicious puncture wounds dot her skin, perfect circular marks that are mostly uniform, but vary in size here and there. There is a jagged gash over her ribs and a burn across the other side, which make her hiss as she tries to pull the rank dressing away.

Or maybe she’s just sitting or lying down on her side, defeated and curled inward.

Wildcards welcome, pick your own location-limited adventure and give me an idea of timeframe/if you are okay with Ruby picking up memories or not if it’s set during the first couple of weeks.

Comments

[eviscerates]

Guardsman Thomas is one of the guards who has most often held this post. He jokes, sometimes, that actually he's just another inmate but they thought they'd put him to use. He's in the dungeon either way, after all. He has an Orlesian country accent, and accepts the tray with a little nod and no protest as he heads towards the door.

Ruby steps back, and the slot for food is opened up, tray carefully slid through, and Guardsman Thomas gives her a nod before nodding to a stool that Bruce can use, rather than having to sit on the floor. "Bring enough for me next time," the guard jokes in a very understated sort of way, before going to return to his post.

For her part, Ruby is examining the food with some interest, but politely waiting despite the hunger that seems to rise immediately. "How are you?"

Not just generally; from her understanding, a lot of people were left pretty messed up from the mission.

[amygdalae]

Bruce glances over to the guard and gives him a smile at the words, nodding. "I'll keep it in mind," he returns despite the joke, but turns his attention back to Lucas soon enough, keeping quiet until she speaks to him first.

"A little banged up, but nothing I haven't gone through before." They were merely flesh wounds and he would recover in time. More important than himself, however... "That's some chicken stew I made, with some bread and cheese." A wry twist comes to his smile after that. "A very Ferelden meal, as people here would say." But he figured with how she felt right now, it was best to make something that could keep for a while. At least then she could take her time and not need to rush wolfing it down at once.

[eviscerates]

"Don't tell Adelaide, but I don't think everything Fereldan is that bad," she replies with a wry kind of smile, sliding the tray closer even if she doesn't start to eat right away. She is simultaneously agonisingly hungry and totally unsure whether she wants to or can handle eating, and it makes for a long moment of consideration before she picks up the bread and tears a piece off. "Except the wine, I'm going to stand by that."

It's nice, just for a moment, to let herself have that humour, even if it is far more understated than usual. "Thank you. It smells really good."

[amygdalae]

"She's Orlesian, she's practically obligated to hate anything related to Ferelden." The wry smile remains on his face, though now he keeps a close eye on Lucas as she moves, relaxing a little when she finally makes a move to take the bread. "Though I can't speak for the wine since I haven't drunk any in a long time."

His expression softens up when she thanks him, and he gestures to the food in response, voice quiet this time when he speaks. "I hope it'll taste as good as well." So you had better eat it, Lucas, and let him know what you think.

[eviscerates]

"Maybe there's a reason for that." In normal circumstances that would have been said ridiculously, with a bright smile and maybe even a gentle elbow to his ribs. Hey, I understand. If I drank something that bad I might go off wine, too. It might just be that she had become a tiny bit of a wine snob, and she can just imagine the appalled scoff from Granny, now. Whiskey or bust.

She can take a hint for what it is, and dips a bit of the bread in the sauce of the stew. "So how are things in the outside world?"

[amygdalae]

Another small, bemused laugh. "Maybe." Of course, the truth is that there absolutely is, but it's not exactly a story that Bruce is going to say any time soon. Its not worth it anyway.

He watches her dip a chunk of bread into the stew, turning his gaze back up at her question. "It's been quiet enough. Everyone's just recovering for the most part." A shoulder lifts up for the tiniest of shrugs. "In time, these last few days will be a memory for them, just like everything else that's happened." Its the only way so many of them have managed since the Rift happened. Adapt, live on, and in some cases, remember.

[eviscerates]

The bread feels like the simpler thing to tackle, in a strange way, something she can chew slow and won't hit her stomach hard, even with her doing better. It's hard to break the caution around food that's been sticking with her, but the sauce is delicious and as she swallows, she scoops up a little with fork, sneaking in some more food as Bruce speaks.

It takes her a moment longer to be ready to speak herself. "The stew's good."
Which felt important to say.

More on topic: "Memories can be pretty powerful." A little shake of her head, more pensive than anything. "I've seen some people do terrible things, holding onto them." Vengeance and memories, that was the real kicker.

[amygdalae]

Seeing the way Lucas is maybe trying not to eat the food with gutso is something of a comfort. At least her appetite seems to be returning, which was good. He can only hope that it will improve from here on out.

"I'm glad you like it," he says first, giving a tiny smile in return. As for her response... he shuffles his feet a little, thinking of what to say, and how to say it. He definitely can't deny the truth of her words - after all he himself is living proof of that. Memories that never fade, only staying away, returning when he least expect it - and sometimes fueling the rage that quietly boils within.

"Still, we all have to move on eventually." Bruce rubs his wrists, trying not to think of the past even as he speaks. Lingering memories, indeed. "No point living in the past when time itself still continues to move."

[eviscerates]

"No, I know. I get that. It's just that, I mean... don't you think that if you've done terrible things, even if it wasn't really you, you should be aware? Because if you let yourself off the hook even for a second, there's every chance you might become callous?"

Her gaze drops, and she has a little more stew ready on the fork, but resting on the dish, still. "Where's the line between forgiving yourself for something you've done and moving on, and getting it into to your head that what happened was okay, somehow?"

A slow exhale. "If we remember the past then maybe we can make sure the future don't get darker."

r u d e

[amygdalae]

Little did Ruby know just how hard those words hit home for Bruce. The fact that so much of what she said are things that he keeps thinking about himself. All the suffering the destruction wrought about because of it - he knows that it is on him. Because of his foolishness, because of his mistake, now...

He remembers. He always remembers. Every face, every cry, every scream. They come to him every time he closes his eyes, when he slips into the Fade in his dreams. Their cold, icy hands that grip at him and drag him down to join them. They're never too far away from him even when he is awake.

"I..." he starts, stops. He can emphasize all too easily, but voicing it out - that's a different thing entirely. He can't risk anybody even have an inkling of this knowledge - Anders was more than enough. "I can't really say for certain. But you're probably onto something there."

here 2 help

[eviscerates]

That he doesn't judge or roll his eyes? It's nice. It's really nice, actually, having Bruce here. Maybe he's on the quiet side, but honestly Ruby is so appreciative of the quiet. Quiet and calm and gentle fit into the same place in her mind, and even though there has been time, there are moments when unfamiliar voices or dealing with too many people at once makes her heart threaten to beat its way right out of her chest. Bruce is steady, and more than that he's her friend.

"I guess I'll figure it out as I go," she reasons, with a little bit of a smile, before taking a moment to have another spoon of stew and pulling away a little more bread, slowly working her way through what he brought her.

"Thanks for coming down here. And thank you for being on the team that came to get us. I know you don't necessarily have a say in whether or not you go on a mission, but it meant a lot.:

cries

[amygdalae]

"That sounds like a plan." And myabe one he would have appreciated, a few years back. But now... though they may have some similarities, in the end her situation is different from his. And they both have the things that deserve. He's glad that at least one of them has a happier ending of sorts, as much as he can understand.

At the thanks Bruce is quick to shake his head, waving off that gratitude. "I'm just glad we could get all of you out before things got worse." A brief pause. "If anything, I should be the one apologizing that it took so long for us to discover what happened to all of you." He knows logically there's no way they could have known better, but still. If somehow they could have known... then perhaps all of this could have been avoided.

[eviscerates]

"I'll try and find it in me to forgive you." It's not quite at light and airy as it would be on another day, on days prior to have so much taken from her, and yet there is a fractional tug at the corner of her mouth, an echo of a smile. For all that she had faith the Inquisition would come, there were stretches where she had felt so completely without hope. They did come, though. They did save them. They didn't lose any of their own.

"No," she clarifies, just in case. "I mean, I know how it is to beat yourself up, but you couldn't have known. Maybe someone could have made a guess, but... what were we gonna do? Send huge parties out for every rift, just in case?" That didn't make any sense.

[amygdalae]

He knows what Lucas is trying to get at, and logically he knows that too - but still. The guilt claws at him anyway, because its impossible to not blame himself after seeing Lucas and what had happened to her. He knows that he's taking it too personally onto himself, but how could he not? What happened to her was something he never wished on anybody at all.

"Just wish we could all have been more prepared, somehow." He shrugs though, knowing that its useless to dwell on it now. "But at least we're pretty sure there isn't going to be any permanent damage on any of you." Especially since they got them out quickly enough - one small blessing from all of this, for better or for worse.