Now I'm gonna reap what I sow

[dreadinquisitor]

WHO: Maxwell Trevean and Gavin Ashara; Gavin Ashara and Pel Ashara
WHAT: Maxwell and Gavin crush awkwardly, Gavin's ex-fiance wanders in. Dun dun duuuun.
WHEN: Forward dated slightly to just before the Mire signups.
WHERE: Battlements
NOTES: All the sadz. Maybe some language? Will updated if needed.

Walking the battlements, Maxwell was on patrol. Watching the dark night sky and the cold, moonlit horizon for rippling wings or marching shadows. In reality the only he'd seen were shining stars and the occasional animal - foxes and rabbits, kiting across the ground.

Humming to himself, a old Marcher battle hymn, he leaned against the stone and chased a familiar constellation with his eyes.

Comments

[slipshot]

His face screwed up, not at all handsomely, the expression painful and twisting. It was entirely unfair, to Maxwell to be kind, even now.

"You're -- You've always been important to me, Maxwell," He said in a small voice, the admission as terrifying as it was to finally turn his eyes up and meet Maxwell's. There was more that he wanted to say, some of them pleas and some of them dire warnings, but the words died there on his tongue.

"... One day, I'll be better," He said, quietly. A promise, to them both.

[dreadinquisitor]

Maxwell's frown deepened, watching Gavin's face wrench. He'd meant that kindly, hopefully comfortingly - letting Gavin know he wasn't asking for anything, that he was just happy to still have his friend... But the elf looked like he'd over him poisoned ale.

And the soft promise was a direct contradiction.

He wasn't certain how to take it, other than it being very clear that moment on the battlements probably never should have happened.

"I'm sure it will be alright, Gavin," he said softly, after a moment. "All anyone can do is... take it one day at a time."

[slipshot]

He had nothing to say to that, but that wasn't a surprise. He'd come to - to what? Beg Maxwell's forgiveness? Fix what he'd broken? Try to pretend that nothing had happened, that they could just go on like they'd always been?

To come and beg for the future he'd seen that tiny glimpse of and then ruined again a half a moment later?

None of them he had any right to do. His head was so muddled and he was so upset that even if he knew what he had been trying to do, he doubted he could do it. All he knew was that he could not bear for someone else to be upset, because of him. And Maxwell being so kind only made it worse, somehow.

So he didn't say anything, he just stepped forward suddenly, wrapping his arms around Maxwell's torso and burying his face in the man's shoulder to hug him tightly.

[dreadinquisitor]

It surprised him, and for a moment, he was stiff and tense under Gavin's arms, but slowly, with a hard swallow the elf couldn't see, he relaxed. Gently he moved his arm and slipped it around Gavin in turn, holding him back.

"It's alright, Gavin," he murmured again. "It's alright."

[slipshot]

It only made him feel worse, how kind Maxwell was, even as he tightened his hug and then abruptly pulled back, wiping at his eyes.

"I'll be better," He promised him, though he couldn't meet his gaze. "Just don't give up on me and I'll-- I'll be better."

He couldn't stay any longer, however, couldn't bear to, but hopefully Maxwell understood-- well, something. Hopefully he understood something, better than Gavin did. He forced a grin to his lips, completely unfelt and at odds with his red-rimmed eyes, but as reassuring as he could make it. "I should... let you sleep."

[dreadinquisitor]

That was less surprising, by now. Four years, a few hours, now... it's how it always seemed to end. Someday, probably, his heart wouldn't give such a twist when it happened.

"Yeah," he murmured, arm dropping back to his side. "I promised to help built a fountain in the garden in the morning."

He brushed at his hair, glanced at Gavin, then away.

"Goodnight."

[slipshot]

It was so innocuous, so innocent, that it surprised him with the force of how much it hurt, to watch Maxwell's eyes turn. To hear the dismissal, in his voice. His ears drooped, slightly, the smile faltering.

"Ah- right. Goodnight, Maxwell," he said, his voice tight, giving another smile he didn't feel before turning away. Only letting his face fall as far as his heart had once he was out of sight.