faderift | The Blood of the Dalish

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The Blood of the Dalish

WHO: Cyril Ashara, Merrick Ashara, Pel, Samouel Haines Gareth, Taashath, Galadriel, Kallian Endris, Bruce Banner, Eirlys Ancarrow, Anders, James Norrington, Beleth Ashara, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Iskandar
WHAT: Summary of content
WHEN: Sometime near the start of Umbralis
WHERE: From Skyhold to along the Serpentine River.
NOTES: OOC post for this plot is here.

The Inquisition has been here before. They visited to ease the tensions between Clan Frandruil and the human village Kaladoun. As they left, peace had seemed to be reached. The Clan's Keeper, Shoshanna, has not kept up her part of the treaty. The Clan was meant to leave and give the village space, but it seems there's always a good reason to stay in place. The Clan's First, Janna, has put aside her pride to reach out to the Inquisition for help. As she has been regularly communicating with the Dalish liaison for the Inquisition, Cyril has agreed to put together a team and help the clan vacate.

While they are there they will break into two groups, one will help the Clan pack up and the other will go into the village and ease tensions there. Once the Clan is ready, all members of the Inquisition who came will reunite and help the Clan move to a new location and settle, to help them get back into the spirit of the nomadic lifestyle.

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"...and why does she ask if she knows you will not desire her?" Taas asks, still gentle. Just a question, without judgment.

It was hard for him to understand, raised so differently and never really been comfortable with the forced idea of marriage and reproducing for the sake of heirs and whatnot. Then again, he also understands the concept of the survival of a people and the need for more hands and minds to continue.

The Qun was effective. Children were needed.

...but he left the Qun because he did not agree with taking people away from what they lived for. Cyril would not be Cyril if he could not be free to live how he wanted to.

"What do you want?" Gentle, again. Encouraging him to speak.

Edited 2016-11-14 00:33 (UTC)

Sam sighs at Cyril's explanation. He could completely understand his reasoning, knew it was a thing for many people, but all the same he didn't like it. Liked it even less because it was much more personal, because it would once again change his relationship with the elf.

He's glad that Taas is able to talk and ask questions, all of which would be similar to what he would have asked. "You're a great person, Cyril, but... why is she suddenly asking you to marry her?" If Cyril and her had known each other for a long time he could see it, but when he thinks about it, it seemed a bit odd."

"It isn't sudden," Cyril explains, though looking back he feels a bit like a fool for not seeing this coming. "She and I have been writing back and forth since I left this Clan with Twisted Fate. I've talked to her a lot about my plans for the future of The People, and I think that impressed her. Then I dropped everything to come here and help her..."

He trails off a bit, considering everything he's told her in those letters. "Plus, I'm sure this helps." He gestures to his face, meaning that she's likely just as distracted by his beauty as everyone else was.

"Cyril." Taas says, with a little firmer tone behind it. "What do you want?"

This was the most important part. It would always be. The warrior is still not judging, just pushing Cyril to be honest. "I still don't quite understand marriage - under the Qun it seemed a selfish thing to bind someone to you like that. Then I learned about love, and it makes a bit more sense to me." Still not enough sense, but that was another story.

"Your happiness is what counts, Cyril. If you want this, then I'm happy too. If not, then you should come back with us. Don't force it because of tradition, it will only make everyone unhappy. Including her."

Normally Cyril taking a moment to point how attractive he is would have Sam smiling, but right now it barely has the corners of his lips turning up - this was a bit too serious for him to find it amusing right now.

"Taas is right, Cyril. I get that tradition and your people are very important to you, but not at the expense of losing yourself." For Sam this is a big deal considering the 'ways of the people' had him put behind stone walls and given little choice. Cyril had a choice here and it didn't make sense to do something that would make him unhappy.

That was the big thing right here; Cyril had the choice.

Sam won't say it out loud or admit it - not right now at least - that perhaps his words were a bit selfish; he didn't want to lose Cyril and right here he very well might. "I'll support you in whatever you choose though."

Cyril looks from one of them to the other. He imagines it might be difficult for either of them to really understand. One of them is from the Qun, where marriage and family are nonexistent, and the other is from a Circle, where relationships like that weren't just discouraged but punished in some cases. He feels like such a tool for making them give their opinions about it.

The fact that both of them basically say they'll support him no matter what should have made him feel pride in his choices to be with them, but right now he just feels like his heart is breaking.

"Saying yes to her would mean that I'm finally making the choice to dedicate my future to The People. I'll still be with the Inquisition until Corypheus is defeated but then I would return here and build a family in this Clan. It would mean no more dalliances with human or Tal-Vashoth men... No matter how much I-" He stops, the words choke a bit. He almost says a word that barely ever escapes him. "Care for both of you. It would end."

"Tell me about the People, kadan. You said you had plans." He needs to know more to understand this better. "Do you want a family?"

Little things that could be important. Taas can't exactly give him the family thing, but if there were other things that Cyril had in motions for the Dalish there could be other ways to compromise.

"Right now you're fighting to stop a crazed darkspawn god-thing. If anything, that's a good way to bring honor to the Dalish." He tries, at least, to ease the pain that was choking his lover. Anything.

He remembers asking Cyril questions like this in the past and the elf always brushed it off or derailed the conversation elsewhere. There was no getting around it now. Honestly Sam was curious to know as well, nodding in agreement to Taas' words.

Did Cyril want a family? That... wasn't unusual. After all that was something he wanted as well, but for him it didn't necessarily mean needing to have his own kids. It wasn't something he needed to have to be happy, not worth losing what he had. But he still wants to hear what Cyril has to say.

"I want..." He starts, thinking this over. "I want to raise children to uphold the best of the Dalish and change the worst of it for the better. I want to do my part to continue The People and contribute to us returning to some fraction of our former selves." He sighs a bit.

"I've always believed that would be my path eventually. I've always wanted to help the People survive and thrive." He supposes he could do that by finding orphaned elven children or helping to support the children of Pel, and Kalli, and another other of the people he has in his life, but directly having children with a wife seems to be the most traditional route.

"Finally, I want to create a future that I'm proud to bring them up in. One where they feel accepted and supported and encouraged choose to do the very best that they can."

Taas nods at that, leaning back a bit. "It sounds like you have a lot planned out. Good things, too." There was nothing wrong with wanting any of that. Admirable, even. He could see Cyril doing all of this with kids, but also a Cyril that used his voice and ideas for adults as well.

"You're fighting for the world right now, aren't you? There are a lot of ways you can help change things that aren't going against the grain for you." He pauses, mulling that over a little bit. Maybe he could be clearer. "You want to do what's expected of you and what is good for the elves, but it doesn't have to be at the expense of who you are. Explore our options, kadan - before you settle into something that will make you unhappy. That is not helping the People."

The warrior glances over to Sam, as if asking his opinion.

Sam sees the look that Taas sends in his direction, and gives a sigh. Leaning on his knees and looking down, the mage slowly rubs the back of his neck.

"I can... understand wanting to raise a family..." he says slowly, quietly, starting with something he could relate to in this situation.

Sam looks back up again and looks at Cyril, letting out another sigh. "I think you would make a great father," he says with a small sad smile - he really does think that. "But if you have to give up things that make you you, so that you fit into what the Clan wants... wouldn't you have to teach your children to do the same? Especially if you're marrying the Clan's future Keeper?" His children would have more expectations put upon them because of all that.

The sad look on Sam's face nearly breaks Cyril's heart and he has to look away from him to focus on Taas instead. Taas, who always seems to be so sturdy and so strong. He still feels like a foundation that Cyril could build a future on, but it would be one so different from the one he had thought he would find.

When he does glance back at Sam, he realizes that he can't really imagine being happy without him either. Sam, who encourages him and gives him a place to relax and decompress, who inspires him to be the best he can be.

He doesn't really want to lose either of them.

Then, as if inspired by that thought, he says something before he can stop himself.

"I love you. Both of you." The word 'love' lingers on his throat and makes him feel a bit like it had choked him on the way out.

That was... unexpected. Taas watches Cyril with a softer look in his eyes, an odd feeling of pride in his chest that didn't seem to belong. There was happiness, too - the kind that was so strong and explosive that it made him want to laugh with joy. That might be taken quite the wrong way, though, so the warrior keeps it bottled up.

...even if he smiles like an idiot.

"You know I love you too, kadan." It's so easy to say, all of the sudden. It runs off his tongue like the most natural thing in the world, and damn if that isn't weird as fuck for someone like Taas.

Weird, but feeling good at the same time.

"That will not change, no matter what you choose here."

The words take Sam by complete surprise as well, brows furrowing as he tries to sort out if he had in fact heard them or had simply fantasized them because of the conversation. It's only with Taas speaking up again that he seems to accept that it has been said, a soft exhale making him realize that he had been holding his breath.

"I... love you, too," he says as well after a few moments, but not as enthusiastically as Taas. Normally he would be more then happy at hearing those words, saying them back, but at the moment the feeling is edged with the possibility that the confession is perhaps being said as a 'farewell', since it wasn't clear on what Cyril had chosen at this moment. That thought worries him and is the only reason he doesn't break out into a grin, still wringing his fingers together nervously.

The contrast between them highlights so much of what he loves about both of them. Taas is just so pleased to experience something good that he wouldn't have under the Qun, and Sam is there still worrying and imagining that things might go wrong while trying to find hope.

After a moment, Cyril moves closer to Sam and takes his hands to stop him from moving his fingers in nervousness. "Sam," he says carefully and then looks over at Taas to make sure they know that he's speaking to both of them.

"It's... it's really difficult for me to say that. I know both of you get that." The fact that neither of them pressured him to say it earlier reminded Cyril how much they understood him. "I'm no good with emotions and being honest with how I feel. I wouldn't do that if I was just going to throw it all away."

He feels this weight in his stomach when he says it. It's so strange to put to words the idea that he's going to abandon the path he had been so sure was his only choice. No marriage, no blood children, nothing like what he had thought of as his duty. He thinks he should feel a sense of failure, but all he senses is determination growing in his chest.

"I'm not going to throw either of you away." When he says it it seems even more obvious that that's the right choice.

Taas is a little bit stuck between 'love is a distraction from your duty' and his own need to see Cyril happy. The views of the Qun were still a bit ingrained in him, and he partly worries if this was going to keep the elf away from important things. A way to enrich the people.

...yet at the same time, he knew that putting a person in the wrong place made the whole suffer. Cyril would not grow and make a difference if he was forced to be something he wasn't.

If Taas could help with that, he would. The fact that the elf could admit to love was a growth all in itself... and Taas feels damn blessed to see it for himself. To be part of it.

"You will not throw you away, kadan. That is the most important part. Not him. Not Sam. Cyril's own life, his own heart. "You are a great man, and you will live to change things your way.... and as long as you want me too, I'll be there to help."

Edited 2016-12-11 15:01 (UTC)

Sam seems to become less tense as Cyril talks to the two of them. Hearing that he wasn't being 'tossed away' has him letting out a breath, a bit out of relief and half for how Cyril had put it. He hadn't thought he was being tossed away, but there was certainly a feeling of separation if Cyril had actually decided on accepting the marriage - having to go back to being close but having a wall between them like before.

He wasn't lying that he would support Cyril in whatever he decided, but at the same time it was a completely selfish thing that he didn't want Cyril to go through with it. It made sense since he was in love with Cyril that he would be, wanting him for himself, or in this case sharing him and still having a major part in his life - he wasn't going to stop Cyril from being with others after all.

"Well... that's good," he says quietly, a slow smile coming to his face. "Because I doubt you could even lift Taas to toss him." Sam chuckles softly at that knowing that it was a stupid joke.

Cyril chuckles at the joke and is thankful for the way it breaks the tension and lets him move on from having his heart exposed. Otherwise, he would have felt like he was drowning in his own emotions.

"I'd have to get a wheel barrow," he agrees. "And probably convince him to toss himself." He smirks over at Taas to show that he's teasing.

"I could be convinced to toss myself," Taas replies with a grin. If joking was helping, then he would happily roll with that. "You are very good at making me want to see you laugh, after all."

True in every single way.

Moving closer, the warrior reaches out and strokes a hand over the elf's hair, a large thumb stopping to brush over Cyril's lower lip. "Do you want us to come with you when you speak to the girl?"

That's right, Cyril would have to go back and tell the First of his decision. "We'll go if you want us," he agrees, standing up from his spot. They were there to support him after all. Course a human and large qunari going with him to talk about a personal matter might make her uncomfortable - just something to consider.

Cyril's lower lip opens a bit at the touch, almost instinctively. The moment isn't as seductive as it could have been, but it was still distracting and inviting. It takes him a moment to realize that Taas had spoken at all.

He shakes his head, pulling away from Taas's hand. "No, it... it would be too much like ganging up on her. I should speak to her by myself." He smiles a bit, first at Taas than at Sam. "It means something that you'd be willing to stand by my side though. Thank you. Both of you."

Taas nods at that and briefly presses his lips against the elf's forehead before he draws back. This was all a little strange to him, but it also felt right, and he had to believe in his heart rather than the teaching of the Qun.

Cyril would be happier like this. He would bloom rather than choke underneath the pressure of being someone he wasn't. He could become someone that made changes to the Dalish, and the warrior is oddly proud of that.

"Alright. We'll be here."

Sam waits a moment for Cyril and Taas to finish their moment before getting up and putting a hand on Cyril's shoulder in way of showing his support. "That... would probably be best," he agrees, smiling slightly, a bit more easily now that he was a lot less tense on the subject matter.

"It is getting late though. Perhaps it's something you should discuss in the morning with her?"

Cyril closes his eyes at the touch of Taas's lips on his forehead and then turns to Sam when the human comes closer. He moves to wrap an arm around Sam, holding onto him lightly.

"Usually this is when I'd make a joke about coming up with something interesting to do before morning, but I think I should go talk to the others who wanted my time."

The warrior chuckles slightly at the mention of Cyril's usual jokes. "You do that, Kadan. You know where to find us if you need us." He shifts a bit, away from the elf and getting on his feet with a slight groan. Everything was so damn small everywhere in this camp that his legs tended to get numb.

"Asit tal-eb, Cyril. All is as it should be."

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el_tybs - 2017-01-13 21:14 (UTC) - Expand

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