faderift | [Open] I can't take the distance

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[Open] I can't take the distance

WHO: Hermione and OPEN
WHAT: Catch-all for the month while Hermione gets used to Kirkwall
WHEN: Throughout Bloomingtide
WHERE: The docks, the Gallows, and exploring Kirkwall
NOTES: Will update with any warnings if necessary. If anyone wants to plan or would like a specific starter, feel free to either PM this journal or hit me up on plurk (

StarryOblivion).

Arrival

While Hermione had never had trouble with boats, she couldn't help feeling nauseated during the entire trip. She was still convinced that she'd left Harry behind in Skyhold, and that she could have done more to find him, and the concern and guilt weighed on her heavily.

By the time she'd disembarked, she was a little unsteady on her feet, and the sight of the Gallows wasn't really helping to foster a cheery disposition. She lingered by the docks for a time, often stopping to stare back across the water towards where they'd come from, but she knew that eventually she'd have to make her way into the Gallows proper.

The Gallows

Though it wasn't as dismal as it had been when she'd been kept a prisoner there in that horrible future world, the Gallows still wasn't the most inviting of places. Hermione didn't consider herself sensitive to that sort of thing, but she could swear she could feel the pain and anguish that lingered, soaked into the walls despite the Inquisition's best efforts to make the place livable. Though she sat in the library more than once and took a few meals in the dining hall and tried to settle into something resembling a day-to-day schedule, she didn't feel wholly comfortable anywhere. It wasn't until now that she realized just how much Skyhold had come to feel like home, and that posed a whole host of other problems in itself.

The city

Though Hermione hated the Gallows, she'd heard enough mixed tales about Kirkwall to be reluctant to travel there. But she knew that staying in the Gallows all day every day wasn't healthy, and so she eventually managed to borrow a set of clothes that wouldn't look too out of place among the locals, and so wouldn't attract any undue attention as she spent a few days familiarizing herself with her new surroundings.

[OOC- For the last option, anyone in her current CR circle is free to venture along with her, and anyone is welcome to encounter her throughout Kirkwall as she tries to get her bearings. She's curious enough that she'll at least pop her head in anywhere that doesn't look clearly dangerous, but feel free to contact me if you want to be sure or want something specific!]

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Shocked by the revelation, Hermione looks Cosima over for a brief moment, though hopefully not long enough to make the other woman feel uncomfortable. "Over a dozen?" she echoes. "Using the same genetic code? Meaning there are over a dozen women who look and sound exactly like you, living their own lives? What would anyone gain from such a thing, especially from doing it outside a laboratory? I mean... yes, you're clearly a very smart, beautiful woman, but over a dozen clones outside of a controlled environment is overdoing it a bit."

"Yeah, it's like ... imagine you had an identical twin, but you were separated at birth. Then do that 11 more times. One of them's a soccer mom in Canada, one of them's a cop, some of them don't even speak English. I'm the only one I've met so far who wears glasses."

As to Hermione's questions, she spreads her hands. "I don't know exactly what the experiment's about, but given that they kept us in the world instead of in some sort of lab, I assume they're looking at epigenetic expression, on some level. Nature vs. nurture on a huge scale. But I agree, it's a ton of variables. Then again, I like my work small enough to keep under a microscope. And not, like, violating every ethical norm on the books."

Hermione's got enough to cope with, so Cosima's not going to go into the illness or the assassinations or Neolution right now. Cloning alone is plenty. After a moment, though, she laughs.

"Shit, you know, this entire time I've been thinking about how to get home. But apart from being away from the people I care about, I guess I really am better off here in some ways."

Despite Cosima's laughter, Hermione doesn't find anything funny about this. It's one thing for her to use something like Polyjuice Potion to temporarily make her look like someone's twin, and the case of having several people take it to look like a half dozen Harry Potters had certainly had its uses. But this wasn't temporary, nor was it about manipulating physical appearances. This was about someone's life. The lives of a dozen people, actually.

"How did you find out? Other than stumbling across someone with your face, that is. Uncovering the whole truth - or at least all that you know now - likely didn't happen all at once."

In fairness, it isn't funny, but laughing is more socially acceptable than "frustrated screaming."

"One of my sisters is - was - a cop. I don't actually know how she first found out, but she had access to facial recognition software at work, and began to cast an increasingly wide net looking for us." Cosima adjusts her glasses absently, remembering. "I thought someone was playing a practical joke on me, at first, but Beth sent me pictures. Copies of what information she'd gotten her hands on. She especially wanted my help because some of us were coming down with a disease and I had the background to actually look into it." She softens a little, speaking of Beth. "I couldn't blame her for being paranoid, but she hit the point where she wasn't willing to trust anyone who didn't have our same face."

The fact that Cosima changes to past tense makes Hermione stiffen a little. Ah. She has no siblings of her own, and true, this Beth person might not have been a sister in the traditional sense, but she's seen what it's like when someone loses a sibling. It's a pain that she isn't equipped to imagine, and as such, she opts against asking what had happened to her. The curiosity is slightly maddening, but her sense of tact outweighs her curiosity, at least for now.

"What sort of disease? An established one, or something unique to your particular genetic structure?" Of course, those questions might not be the most tactful either, and the expression on her face is contrite as she adds, "Sorry... that's not the cheeriest of topics. Then again, given that it sounds as though there was a heightened sense of danger surrounding you, I suppose none of this has been exactly 'cheery.'"

"It's okay. The healers here already know, or as much of it as I can explain." Which answers the question as to whether Cosima has the disease herself. "As far as I got back home, it's a part of our genetics. We were designed to be infertile, but the disease manifests as a problem with our epithelial tissues throughout the body. That's, uh, like ... the linings of a lot of your organs, your blood vessels, your glands. For us, it usually shows up first in the lungs."

She exhales."Anyway. This is ... I don't mind talking about it if you want to know. But I didn't mean to, like, dump my messed up life story on you out of nowhere."

The idea of human beings being designed to be infertile or meant to be anything else other than people is disturbing to Hermione, but she doesn't bring that up. Instead, she's more concerned for Cosima, shaking her head as she replies, "No, really, that's all right. I just... didn't know." And it's interesting, even if in a morbid sort of way. But she's not going to tell Cosima that.

"Are you exhibiting any sort of symptoms? Have the healers been able to help you?"

"Yeah, to both. Even before I came through a rift, I was starting to exhibit respiratory symptoms, not totally unlike tuberculous, but not contagious. But with some trial and error, we've figured out spirit healing every two to three weeks keeps me pretty functional. I was working on a potential cure back home, but I hadn't gotten very far and Thedas isn't really up to gene therapy yet."

Even Cosima can't be totally breezy about the fact that even magic can't entirely cure her. That'd be too easy, she supposes. She's not ungrateful for the help she's been given, and doesn't care to dwell on the state she might be in if it hadn't been available.

The notion of contagion is the last thing on Hermione's mind, but she supposes it's good that Cosima isn't likely to spread an unknown and incurable disease throughout Thedas. She's less concerned with herself and more about one: Cosima, two: the people of Thedas, and three: the fact that there are some who would see such an epidemic as an excellent reason to be against rifters.

"Given that magical studies is so readily available here, have you considered trying to combine magic with the science you're more familiar with? That is, granted, I know you're not a mage, but there are many books on Herbology and Potions - or, um... botany, I suppose, or whatever they might officially call it here. Each herb has their own special property, as do other organic materials, and that's something that anyone can study, mage or not."

Cosima smiles a little. "I've been doing what I can, yeah, but I'm mainly prioritizing research about the rifts and the anchor shards now. Especially after what we saw..." In the future sounds bleak, and in a future isn't much better. She assumes Hermione knows what she's getting at anyway.

"Back home, a cure would have been for my sisters too. Here, it's just for me -- even if I found a cure that incorporated magic, there's no guarantee I can get back, or I could duplicate it there if I tried. And my life's not in danger as long as I'm here, unless I'm somehow kept from spirit healing indefinitely. It makes more sense to focus on something that threatens a lot of people. I mean, I think so, anyway."

"That's very... noble of you," Hermione decides after a pause. Thinking over the best way to put it delicately, she adds, "But your life is just as valid as your sisters', or of anyone else here. It's good to have a back-up to the spirit healing; after all, what if we'd been in the Gallows for an extended period of time?"

Realizing that they are, technically, in the Gallows for an extended period of time, she corrects herself. "I mean... back then. Or... at that time. You know what I mean. Considering how long we've been in Thedas, it wouldn't be a terrible idea to think of things in the long-term, which means that your health is just as important as the next person's, especially given what an invaluable asset you are to the Inquisition."

"I know what you mean," Cosima says, with a shrug. "And like I said, it's not like I've stopped entirely. But I'm a geneticist, not a witch. Though," she adds, wry, "I wouldn't be shocked to discover Anders has been working on something on the sly without telling me."

Because Anders.

"I don't know, I'm not going to turn down help if it's offered, but I don't feel super indispensable most days. I'm just trying to keep up." People have been kind, and she's attached to other rifters; Kirk, Jamie, Church. Even Hermione, though they don't know each other as well yet. But Cosima feels there's a difference between doing extra research on her own time and rerouting Inquisition resources.

"...I should probably stop agreeing to field missions, though."

"Well," Hermione brings up, lips curling into a wry smile, "it is Anders."

Yes. Because Anders.

"You're a rifter, and as such, you're one of a very small percentage of people in this entire world that can close the rifts. You will only stop being indispensable once all the rifts in Thedas have been closed, and by then, I'm assuming that most scholars will have devoted at least a little bit of time to figuring out how to get us back to where we need to be."

Assuming it's possible at all, especially with all the rifts closed. But that's a catch-22, and one that Hermione would rather not focus on at the moment.

"As for field missions, if it's something you feel very strongly about, I'd suggest making sure there's a healer already on board for said mission. I wouldn't have been able to walk away from a few of them, had it not been for Anders or Bruce or some of the other mages."

Cosima's look is wry, but she nods. "That's a good point. The healers, but also the closing rifts thing. At least I've got one indispensable skill going for me."

She doesn't distrust the Inquisition, as such, and her desire to help is genuine. But she sometimes wonders, if she can't get home, what will happen to the rifters if they succeed in sealing all of them. Then what? But she suspects that's occurred to Hermione without prompting.

"Anyway. Thanks for listening; I know it's a lot. It's just ... it's kind of funny. I've told a person or two here, but without context, the whole clone thing sort of loses some oomph. And back home, I don't really have anyone to talk to about it except my sisters. My parents don't even know."

"I'm sure you have more skills at your disposal," Hermione brings up, smiling gently. "You can likely help introduce Thedas to modern scientific theory, though it will take quite some time before they advance towards anything you're more familiar with."

She's a little concerned when Cosima tells her that precious few people know of her true background, and the smile fades somewhat. "I suppose I can understand not telling your parents; I had to hide some things from mine as well, not too long ago. And I suppose most of the locals - and a few of the rifters - might think of it in terms of you being a twin, or some such thing. But if you ever need to talk, Cosima... I don't know how much I could help, but I'd be willing to listen and do what I can. We all need a support system."

"Hey, thanks." It's quiet, and sincere. "Really. Someone to listen, especially someone clever who knows either my world or one so close to it we can't know for sure it's different ... that's a lot. And it's mutual, OK? If you need to talk, I'm happy to listen too."

Hermione's a good listener, and they certainly have more of a chance to actually talk now than they did fighting for their lives in a possible future. Cosima won't be sorry to see a little more of her, if things work out that way.

Hermione nods slowly, affirming that she'd heard Cosima's offer, even if she's presently thinking more about her own offer to listen to her when she might need it. After all, while Hermione might not have had the easiest time of things, there are certainly plenty of people with greater weights to bear. She doesn't know if Cosima is one of them, but she's willing to help her make that weight a little lighter.

"I suppose that's what friends are for," she brings up after a moment, managing another small smile. "Heaven knows we could always use more of those, especially given how potentially hostile this place can be."

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[Open] I can't take the distance

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