[OPEN] I have never known peace

[ragweed]

WHO: Kit + you??
WHAT: Kit does what he can to help out the Inquisition during blue flu season, and reconnects with some friends (and lovers) along the way.
WHEN: Throughout February.
WHERE: Gallows + Kirkwall
NOTES:This will be Kit's last log before he goes out in a blaze of glory at the end of the month, so if you'd like one last thread with him, ping me @ ragweed on plurk or on discord and we can make it happen. Starters will be in the comments as I write them up. CW for death and violence in Kit's thread w/ the Medicine Seller.

I have never known hunger
Like these insects that feast on me

Comments

[ragweed]

What heart wouldn't break even the tiniest fraction at the way Nari speaks of Sina? Kit's heart, always worn on his sleeve despite his best efforts to keep it covered by his Legionnaire's armour, cracks a little for her. He barely knew the girl, but she'd left an impression, and knowing that she isn't around anymore, that she's gone for good and won't ever brighten another stranger's morning with her gentle smile, leaves a painful tightness in his chest. She was so young. No one should have to bury someone so young.

"Maybe he loved you too much, and he was afraid."

"Maybe," Kit agrees, though doubt shows in the shadows of his face. There's a bit of hope there, too; hope that the love he'd felt had been, in some small measure, reciprocated, even if the toll it took on Vandelin was too much for him. "Maybe," he adds a moment later, sounding a little more sure of himself.

He does note the way Nari's eyes wander around his small hovel, resting on the Medicine Seller's coat, his nest of blankets near the woodstove, bits of a tea set waiting for him to return to tend to them. Kit scratches absently at his beard, smiling wistfully. "What," he asks her, chuckling wryly, "you think he could be the one?" Insofar as anyone could ever be 'the one' to anyone else.

[nadasharillen]

Nari spreads her hands, "Like I said, I don't know about Vandelin, but... I can't imagine the thought of you being gone would tear someone up enough to need to leave without it being because the feeling was too big and too hard to hold. That's something more than just friendship."

As far as the Medicine Seller? She smiles her quirked gentle smile, pleased he'd noticed what she was doing, "I don't know about the one," she says, echoing his thought, "but with the skills he has and the wares he sells, he must have spent time with death and grief. Probably a lot of time. People like him have learned to hold those things well enough that they don't have to walk away. They've carved room into themselves to hold the fears and worries of others without breaking."

Whether it's advisable or not, she pauses to finish the rest of her glass. "And you made room for him too. You can hold the things he's seen and done." As far as she knows, anyway. "Holding someone you can hold all of is special. As is being held in all your broken trampled glory."

Nari frowns thoughtfully, talking into her empty glass, "Don't wait too long, Kit. Our lives aren't fair or just, and things happen. Be with him, if he'll let you. Live now. You can die when you die."

[ragweed]

"Don't wait too long, Kit. Our lives aren't fair or just, and things happen. Be with him, if he'll let you. Live now. You can die when you die."

There's still something left in that bottle of wicked liquor that Nari brought with her, so Kit reaches out for it and finishes off the contents of it in both their glasses. "That," he says knowingly (and perhaps a little drunkenly), "sounds like something to drink to, in my opinion."

He lifts the glass to Nari, smiling at her lopsidedly. "To living now."

And dying when they die.

[nadasharillen]

She smiles back, her own just as lopsided, and lifts the glass to Kit.

"To living now."

And dying when they die.