faderift | The gift of magic

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The gift of magic

WHO: Anders, Chloe
WHAT: A magic show and talk of magic
WHEN: After Lyrium Plague, before Phylactery Plot resolution
WHERE: Infirmary
NOTES: Talk of mage stuff from Anders' perspective

Things are not quite back to normal. There's the whole issue of someone messing with his phylactery going on, after all, making him stressed and nervous as he works, but at least he's back to working. Having the ability to help all of his patients again, even if it means he has to take extra precautions, is a form of relaxing. For him.

When Chloe comes in, she'll find him working on something that is normal: potions. Everything's portioned out and poured in, now he's just casting to activate them.

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She reacted with a lot of stunned silence for a moment. So that's what the lady she'd met during the flu had meant when she said the mages were free now. She felt like an idiot for not making that connection, but enslaving people like that felt like, hurting them, were things that didn't happen at home anymore, not in places she lived. Things you heard about on the news in foreign countries where you felt bad but couldn't do a whole lot.

Somehow it had a little more impact coming from someone she was talking to face to face. It made her think about how scared she'd been for Max, how worried she'd been at the idea of someone finding out about her powers and what could have happened to her for being different.

"It shouldn't matter how many people you can or can't win over. It's not right to do that to people." There was that hint of moral outrage in her tone no matter how hard she tried to keep it even. The curses of being an overemotional nineteen year old. "Just because you can do something they can't, that shouldn't mean anything."

Why is it that the Rifters understand so much more than the people here in Thedas? He doesn't get it.

"It matters because if the Chantry can regain its power by caging and controlling us again, then the Chantry will do so. If a large number of the non-mages are with us, they may see it as more trouble than it's worth." He takes a breath, shaking his head. "They're scared. I can understand why someone would be afraid of someone who can set you on fire, but there are swords, bows, daggers, any number of actual weapons out there, and we're people. We didn't ask for this. But we're fighting against history and religion. It's..."

Anders trails off and shakes his head. "It should be that straightforward. Maybe one day it can be."

They're scared. Those words get a quick scoff out of her, her arms folding over her torso in a huff. "What bullshit." That's the only thing she had to describe it, because as far as she was concerned, that's what it was. "Fear isn't a good enough reason. Bad people will use anything they can to hurt others, you don't just punish everyone who's like them because of it." She let out an angry sigh, her fists clenching as she spoke, the next words delivered with more anger than before, "And it certainly doesn't justify breaking apart a family."

If there was one way to get Chloe fired up in defense of anything, it was to pull kids away from their parents. Nothing struck more of a chord than that.

She took a breath to try and calm herself, at least, jaw tense as she looked back to him. "I'm sorry. That sounds so fucking weak, but I am. I hope the... Chanwhatever doesn't ever get their way with something like that again."

She gets a wry, tight smile at the declaration of bullshit. It is bullshit. There are so many ways to die, especially in a city where a large portion of the population lives in darkness and sewage, and in a world with dragons and darkspawn.

"Thank you. They'll absolutely try. They're not going to let their power stay weakened easily. But what mages are seen doing for the Inquisition might help us out. We'll try our best."

Most of them. And some will try to go back into the cages because the cages were familiar and they were lucky without realizing it. He doesn't know how to help them, but he's trying. Anders starts shelving the finished bottles before looking back over at her.

"The Inquisition was, incidentally, founded by the Chantry, and three-fourths of its leadership were or are part of the Chantry. It is an extension of it. But as Corypheus threatens all of our lives, supporting the Inquisition makes sense. When Corypheus is defeated... We'll see how they use it."

She didn't know how to feel about it all. The Inquisition was something she had been unsure of from the start, but she also had never been very good about authority and being told what to do in general. The idea that they could use it for something else, something that doesn't help to keep people safe, makes her feel slightly... nauseous.

"Sounds like the military back home." Always capable of being used for good, but not always utilized in such a way. She sighed shaking her head, looking at the ground instead of at Anders.

"If I'm still here, I... I'd help however I could. I don't know how much that is because honestly I'm pretty useless, but I would."

"No one is useless."

His voice is confident as he comes back close to her. "There are a myriad of ways to support something. What is it you enjoy doing, or find is your strength? Because even now you can use that, Chloe, if you'd like."

There's also the shard in her hand, but he's not fond of encouraging younger people into combat. If they've the freedom to stay back they should take it.

It's a fairly depressing length of time that it takes her to answer that question. What did she enjoy doing? She didn't find she had any strengths anymore. She hadn't in years. It was clear she was searching, trying to remember what she'd always been good at, what things she'd excelled, what hobbies she'd had, and... well. It wasn't a lengthy list.

"I dunno. I'm a good drinker," she offered, mostly as a joke. She rubbed her neck, looking at her bag, shrugging slightly. "Bullshitting my way out of trouble. I'm told I'm okay at drawing. I can... fix stuff? You guys don't have the technology I'm used to, but anything that require gears to function I can usually figure out pretty quickly."

He acknowledges the joke with a flash of a smile, waiting as he lines up another row of vials.

"Can you make what you fixed back home? There'd be definite value in improving our world through technology. There's also value in art, and being able to talk one's way out of things. I certainly have no talent for the last. Maker, I tend to talk myself into more trouble," he adds with a short laugh.

"The point is you have strengths, Chloe. You left out that you've a sense of wonder and a desire to learn new things, what brought you down to watch me do magic in the first place. You're encouraging, I've seen it around. You persevere rather than giving up when things are difficult. There is so much you have to offer, even if it takes learning some new things for the sake of applying your skills to this world. For as long as you're here, you've a place."

"Cars?" She shakes her head. "I mean, I don't think I could. I know a lot about the parts needed to fix one, but not so much how the parts are made. Computers might be easier, but it'd mean trying to create or discover metals that you guys are severely lacking." She shrugged, looking down at her hands, because it makes her feel like she sounds even more useless when she says it out loud like that.

The observations get an awkward laugh, not ever the sort to think of herself as any of that, but also not knowing how to brush them off without sounding pathetic. It's a conundrum be often finds herself in. "Well, I guess that that's more than I've usually got," she said finally, looking back up at him.

"Thanks, I guess."

Anders stops working to focus on her. Was he ever this young? Probably.

"You're welcome, I'm sure," he says, trying to hide his amusement. "You've also got friends here, which should make for something. If the making things is too complicated, what of chemistry? Could you still do that?"

Friends...? She wrinkles her forehead, not sure whether or not she had considered herself friends with anyone or not. Fern, maybe, but se was doing her damndest to not think about the elven girl in that moment since she always had the hardest time keeping that stupid look out of her eyes when she did. She'd talked to people, she guessed, but she could barely remember what it meant to have friends to know if that's what they were.

The crease in her brow deepened more at the thought of science, finally clearing her throat roughly, shaking her head, not really looking at him as she did so because it was probably too much as it was. "I - No - I mean, - Maybe. I don't - I'm not really the the science-y kind of person anymore. It's been a while."

Anders fully stops his work, taking a seat on one of the stools and focusing on Chloe.

"There's no telling how long you'll be here. It may be for just a few more moments, or it may be years. I'd like to suggest you consider what you'd want to do with your time here. Is there something you'd want to learn that you could, here? Or perhaps, despite the technology gap, there's some job here that could help you when you return. Take your time, but consider that you do have this time to do with as you... mostly wish. You're beholden to the inquisition, but it's not a sentence." Presently.

The idea that she didn't know how long she would be here was enough already to have given her anxiety. There was a lot riding on being stuck here, things she had felt initially she had to go back to, but now she was feeling like it might not be so bad to just avoid. The more she'd thought on it, the more she'd even been okay with just staying in Thedas. For a while. Maybe for good. Given what she had to go back to...

Or perhaps, despite the technology gap, there's some job here that could help you when you return. The words stick out more than the others, because she doesn't know how to face them. How to say she has nothing to return to regardless of what choice Max makes. She feels that familiar tightening in her chest, the churn of her stomach, the way her breath stops.

"Yeah. I - I'll... think on that." She manages to choke out, going to pull herself up from her own stool. "I, um - I've probably bugged you enough for one day, though. You've answered a lot of questions and I'm probably just distracting you from, y'know, more important stuff." She waves her hand somewhat vaguely at the potions he had been working on, not really looking at him as she did so. "Thanks, though. For entertaining my curiosity or whatever."

It's obvious he's said the wrong thing, but he doesn't know which part was wrong so he has no idea what to apologize for.

Anders awkwardly stands up as she heads for the door.

"Of course. You can... You can come back any time, Chloe. I like answering questions." After she leaves it's a few long moments before he goes back to work, with him hoping he hasn't accidentally driven someone away for good again.

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The gift of magic

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... apparently i deleted this notif from my inbox somehow. i am so sorry.

No worries!

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