faderift | (no subject)

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(no subject)

WHO: Felix and Adelaide. Then Felix and OPEN.
WHAT: Felix isn't feeling well and collapses. Adelaide tends to him. After, he's up for visitors but is still very weak.
WHEN: Current.
WHERE: The main hall. Then, Felix's private room.
NOTES: Description of illness?

[For Adelaide]

Felix was probably pushing himself too hard, if he was honest. It was becoming more and more clear every day that his time was running out. He didn't have much left and he wanted to try to get as much done as possible before. He had been up all night drafting letters home urging those he had ties with to support the Inquisition.

Then early in the morning he had gone to visit his father. The elder Alexius had fussed more than anything, but Felix still made the effort to try to see his father as much as he could, while he could. Then came arranging the letters to be sent north.

He was exhausted just doing those few things, though the lack of sleep hadn't been helping. He felt the headache coming on. There was a pounding in his head. It was rhythmic. A song. His ears were ringing with it and his head felt like it was swimming.

He made his way up the stairs to the main hall of Skyhold. He was planning to use this path to get to his room while picking up something to drink along the way, but when he bent to pick up the cup he felt his head swarm. His vision blacked.

He heard the gasps and exclamations from those in the hall as his body fell to the ground, but he wasn't aware of much else outside of that.

[OPEN]

Later he's in his room, resting. His body feels clammy. He's sweating but his skin feels so cold. There's very little color left in his cheeks which seem hallow and thin.

Still, he knows rumors are spreading about his health and he's willing to see visitors if anyone wants to see him.

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Felix still wasn't entirely aware of what was going on but he was saved severe injury thanks to Adelaide's quick action. His head tilted to the side as he gasped a bit for air.

His face was very pale and around the edges of the collar of his robe one could see brown lines of his veins. The discoloration was noticeable now as the symptoms were getting harder to cover up using his father's treatments.

He responded to her voice, eyes fluttering a bit. "The song," he muttered, his voice low and hard to ear. "It won't stop."

"We need to move him to his room- I do not care who you get to carry him but get someone." She snapped to the nearest guard, clerk, whoever before resting her hands on his jaw- the lack of color, the way his veins were darkened- the exhaustion.

The ache she could feel in her teeth from here, Compassion's light flaring and flowing from her fingers into him to ease some of that as she has ever since she's met him- he had but weeks, now. Perhaps a month if they were fortunate and he was careful.

"Breathe deeply, ma Douleur, we are going to get you back to your room where you can rest."

Felix heard her enough to follow her orders. He focused on breathing and that brought some of the world back to him, at least it was able to break through the song that seemed to be coming from the very blood in his head.

Then there were men around helping Adelaide get him to his quarters. He was able to force his eyes open and saw the shapes that belonged to the faces around him, peering at him.

"Fasta vass," he muttered now. He wasn't usually one for cursing, but it seemed appropriate to do so when he had made such a scene in front of many of the Inqusition's most important guests.

"I can walk." Though, honestly, he probably wouldn't be able to without support.

"As I cannot trust you to gauge how much you can do in an hour, let alone in a day, without causing yourself to collapse I am not trusting you to know whether or not you can walk." It probably wasn't all that kind to snap at a dying man- but this. He knew better, and if he did not? She would make certain he knew better for the future.

"Careful with his legs- I have his shoulders. Yes I can manage- do you want to interrupt this spell? No? Good." Walking and working- it wasn't something she'd done often but this was familiar enough for her to manage. "Focus on me, Felix. Deep breaths."

The snapping worked though. Probably because it reminded him of his mother, who had been so powerful and strong. The woman speaking now was much kinder than she had been, but the command still had that same power.

He goes silent then, and lets her have her way. Instead of trying to protest he just breathes.

It took some maneuvering- some soft swearing on her part when they were not as gentle as need be- but Adelaide saw Felix to his room. Sent the remainder away as soon as he was set on his bed. No matter how much power she poured into him, how much of the ache she took- that song.

That did not come from just any illness. Nor did those veins.

"...Felix. What is killing you?"

Felix all but melted into his bed. His head was still swimming a bit and the comfort and safety offered by the mattress was undeniable.

He swallowed hard against his dry throat. "You don't have to worry. My father managed to keep it contained and we're careful. It won't spread as long as I don't bleed..."

Then came a bolt of panic. "I fell. I didn't bleed did I?" He doesn't feel like he cracked his head open but his hand still moves to check. "Anyone who touched my blood needs..." But the panic was making him short of breath and weak. It was hard to keep talking when he couldn't catch his breath.

"That is not what I asked-" Then the fear of his blood and that?

That narrows it down a great deal. None of the answers were pleasant, they never were when it came to wasting diseases. But this?

"No, you didn't- there was not any blood-" She reaches out, cradling his face in her hand as the other rested against his chest- over his hammering heart and struggling lungs. "Breathe, Douleur. Deep breaths. There was no blood. No one touched it."

He focuses on breathing as she directs and calms down. It helps to know that he hadn't put people in danger by pushing himself too hard.

After he has control again he swallows.

"It... It happened a few years ago. We were travelling home from Orlais. I was meant to be enjoying my time away from university. The darkspawn attacked. They killed my mother and sickened me. My father was convinced that he could have protected us. He blamed himself. That's why letting go of me was so difficult for him. That's why he turned to the Venatori."

He doesn't say it's the Blight, but why else would he be talking about darkspawn?

"...You're blighted." Tainted.

She knew full well there was no fixing it- but this? She could not even manage to comfort him for what would come at the end. No power would block out the song at it's strongest. Nothing could be done for him then and he already spoke- saying it wouldn't stop.

What more could she do for him?

He looks very sadly at her. "I am," he admits. "I told you there was nothing that could be done."

"...I shall simply have to work harder to help you ignore the song until-" She sighs, squeezing his hand. "Until your time."

He looks down at their hands, a little surprised and very touched.

"It's very rare for someone to learn the truth and still be comfortable touching me."

"If I was going to be tainted by touching you- it would have happened already, Felix." She rolls her thumb across his knuckles.

He's comforted by the deliberate touch, more than he can even say. "My father was at least able to accomplish that."

Then, after a slight pause. "If he hears about this, he'll be worried. I know you have right to be angry with him, given what might have happened to other mages if his plan had worked, but do you think you can go see him later? To make sure he knows that for now I am still breathing."

He needs for Gereon to accept what will happen to him, but he doesn't want his father to worry needlessly without updated news.

"Then he has managed more than most." That he'd found a way to make this possible was admirable- even if what he'd done at Redcliffe- she hadn't been a part of that particular unpleasantness- his work must be respected.

"When I am done here I will pass that along." And she would not be done until she was certain he was stable again. The inability to breathe was concerning.

He leans back again and settles in. Comforted as much as he can be. He focuses on breathing again and manages to calm himself. His skin is still terribly pale and a line of sweat is coating his forehead.

In the quiet, he can hear the song again.

Compassion flows through their joined fingers, soothing what aches they can. Adelaide uses a kerchief to wipe the sweat from his brow, frowning at his tense expression. The song.

Were she able to share with him what she heard of the Spirits- she would. But all she has to offer his her own voice- and it was no great wonder. But it was something. An old, sad, wandering song, halting and hesitant, but it was what she could do. Whether it was a comfort or not- that was for Felix to decide.

It was a comfort. More than anything, though, it was something to focus on, to drown out the taint within his blood. He turned to look at her, focusing on her face and her mouth. He voice was beautiful, even if she was hesitant with it.

He shifted his hand to intertwine their fingers a bit. His grip was weak but at least he could show her that it was helping. She was helping.

She hasn't sung for ages- too much to do, too little time, others were better suited for it. On the odd occasion she'd sung for an old friend in the Spire when thoroughly drunk, if only to prove his taste in music was terrible. But this was- sober. Sobering.

As the song wound down she squeezed back. Attempted a faint smile. "...Shall I recommend you have company until you feel fit to rest? A sleeping draught might help you sleep without hearing it."

He doesn't want her to stop but it seems selfish to ask her to continue.

"A sleeping draught sounds wonderful." He doesn't think he can handle more company. He wants to be with her, but he's already troubled her enough.

"I think sleep will do a world of wonders."

"I can send for one and, perhaps, remain with you until it takes effect if you like." Men and their pride do not often weather baring their weakness easily- but to be alone with that song...it was not something she could leave him to. Not gladly.

Felix nodded at that and then closed his eyes a bit. He focused on getting his breath steady.

"Thank you."

She had to leave him long enough to stick her head in the hall and call for someone. To relay the need for a sleeping draught, to urge them to hurry before slipping back to her chair at Felix's side. Without hesitation she reached out once more to take Felix's hand. "It'll be here shortly."

Felix turns his hand a bit but he doesn't really have the strength to grip onto her hand. He gives her a soft smile, but it seems more like a grimace.

"I'm sorry... I didn't mean to-to worry you."