[open] far from my mother's home

[altusimperius]

WHO: Benedict and you
WHAT: October catch-all
WHEN: throughout Harvestmere
WHERE: Kirkwall dungeon/gay baby jail
NOTES: will add if necessary

For Riftwatch members in good standing, there's a built-in captive audience residing in a cell below the Kirkwall mage tower. One barred window peeks out onto the dreary courtyard, and on the opposite wall an interior door opens onto a dark, torchlit hallway, a bench placed on the wall facing in for the comfort of guests and interrogators.

Inside the cell, every day is the same. Sometimes Benedict is sleeping on the little bed supported by chains from the wall, sometimes he's pacing, sometimes he's standing on his toes to rest his chin on the windowsill, hands gripping the bars to keep himself upright, starved for any form of stimulation whatsoever.

Increasingly, he can be found sitting or lying on the floor of his cell, staring at the ceiling or fiddling with the straw scattered on the floor, bending and twisting it in such a way that, on closer inspection, he might be trying to figure out how to weave it.

Visitors will find him quite receptive, even excited to see them. Unless they're Flint.

Comments

[saam]

"Can I ask why?" If he says he'd prefer not, she'll pile some pressure on elsewhere, but she's found letting people feel like they have a choice makes them open up more. Plus, it seems more idle, less pointed.

[altusimperius]

“She was locating slaves, and former slaves, for her...” he waves his hand vaguely— he never really knew what she was doing, just that she was doing it.
“I asked her to help me find a slave my mother had sold, and she came with me to buy her back. I... suppose she was afraid I’d just sell her again, which, for the record, I wouldn’t have.” He seems oddly good-natured about this part: it’s the truth, after all, and he still doesn’t see it as a transgression.

[saam]

This is all information Eshal can neither trust, confirm, nor deny. It's not enough detail to go on, and following up on it sounds like a goddamn nightmare. She nods, and keeps eating.

"So you took her 'cause she wanted to go, not because you're friends or whatever?"

[altusimperius]

He thinks on the question, a hint of shame crossing his face. Is Kitty his friend? Is he an idiot for imagining she was?
Probably, as with most things.

“She wanted to go,” he says with a little shrug, trying to be noncommittal and largely failing.

[saam]

Eshal nods, idle curiosity sated. "I met her recently. Wasn't what I was expecting. Wondered how other people got on with her." A shrug, and she finishes her rice. In one smooth motion, she throws the spoon between the bars of Benedict's cage.

It's definitely not a reward for answering a simple question.

"Another thing, uh. Last time you seemed a little upset about it, so I didn't wanna press, but... can you tell me more about the blood magic going on there?"

[altusimperius]

This elicits a smirk of something near fondness. Kitty’s an angry little shit, big surprise.
“I’m not sure anyone does,” he replies, both with contextual honesty and total ignorance of what makes her so furious about him specifically.
The spoon clatters in front of him, and he flinches at the sound, sending a curious look Eshal’s way but not bending to pick it up. That was in someone else’s mouth, and now it’s on the floor, he’s not going to use it.

“The blood magic is... I never saw it on a grander basis than...” He’s reluctant to say more, if only for the nature of the truth. But he’s trying, and the person in question is hardly here to punish him for it.
Or, you know, protect him.

“...well. My mother.” He looks down. “She used it on us. ...me.”

[saam]

Picky for a prisoner. She'll take it back when he's done with his hand-rice.

She looks a little curiously up, then over, at Benedict. "I thought- I thought bas loved their children. Protected them and shit. That sounds... dangerous."

[altusimperius]

His hand stops partway to his mouth, and Benedict's eyes go vacant for a moment as the words strike him. All of a sudden, his appetite is gone.
He lowers his hand, looking down into the bowl. How can he explain to someone else what he himself still can't get a grasp on?

"Well," he begins, but falters, going silent again as he considers. "...well I think, it..." He chews the inside of his cheek, furrowing his brow.

"...well how do you define love," he decides, wincing a little as he hears himself say it.

[saam]

[And then there are times when you don't even have to think about it; she knows honesty is the best policy here, without even considering the alternative.]

Wouldn't know. No families under the Qun, no romance, none of it. Here, everybody's so obsessed with it. Still trying to get my head around it, honest.

[altusimperius]

That’s more reassuring than it might seem at first glance.
“I was heir to my mother’s seat in the Magisterial Senate,” Benedict explains, a little less guarded than he might be with one of the many people who hate his mother. “It... love isn’t... relevant.”
Not that he doesn’t wish it were, based on how he’s seen other people interact, and talk about their parents. He tucks a strand of hair behind his ear.

[saam]

She listens, genuinely listens, because why shouldn't she? She's always been curious about love. It's not something she wants for herself-- seems messy, intractable and potentially insulting-- but it's clearly something important to other people. And if you want to be a diplomat, you have to understand the things that are important to other people.

"Because you were important?" She cocks her head to the side. "You were bred for a purpose? That's how it's done in the Qun, you know. The children are separated from their sires immediately. Raised by others, who assess their purpose, but they're bred for a reason."

That is also true and honest, if purposefully so. Making a connection of empathy between them might not be a bad idea.

[altusimperius]

He nods. The Qun has always been foreign and frightening as a concept, but it's hard to deny the similarities between it and what he's experienced.

"I was raised by a slave," he says quietly, down to his hands. "The one I-- Kitty and I bought away from her new owner. But she couldn't have decided my purpose, I was always meant to be a Magister."
It sounds so idiotic when he says it now. He's never had any real aptitude for politics.

[saam]

"Before you were even born?" Eshal tilts her head to the side, genuinely curious (and being curious about other people's lives makes them more willing to share later, but that's all subconscious for now). "In the Qun, they wait at least until you can walk to assign you jobs. Breeding is intention and all, but they can't know. Plenty of people end up doing something different because they just aren't suited for the one thing."

[altusimperius]

What she's describing honestly makes more sense than what he knows. Benedict nods in affirmation of her question.

"In Tevinter it's about who your parents are," he explains, "sometimes your destiny can change, if you're born a mage from non-magical parents. Or vice versa. But if you're born an Altus, you're going to be doing Altus things whether you want to or not."

He smirks grimly. "I'm the only child in my family. Someone had to continue the line." Not that he will now.

[saam]

"Well-- that's stupid. I mean, I'm sorry, but that's stupid." Because this seems like the sort of thing that won't really break his opinion of her, so apologizing for no reason is a good way to endear oneself. "They should just have more. Couldn't they tell you weren't suited? It's not a bad thing. They wanted me to be a tama for a while, and I was not suited for that."

[altusimperius]

Even if she didn't mean it personally, Benedict wilts a little.
"I suppose they could," he admits, "I don't think..." Twisting his mouth, he scuffs one of his feet on the ground. "...I don't think Mother even wanted one child, to tell you the truth."

[saam]

"She should-" Eshal shakes her head. "No, nevermind. I'm thinking like... In the Qun we all serve the Qun before ourselves. I don't know how it is in Tevinter, but in the Qun, she would be seen as the failure for not producing something that made it stronger. Her wants are not important."

She sighs a little, slumping slightly. As much as this is a display to earn sympathy, it's also true; the best sort of deception, when truth and lies serve equally.

"But that is why I left the Qun. Because individual wants are... very important." She looks up at him with a tired smile. "So I guess I'm talking out my ass."

[altusimperius]

That seems raw. As someone who absolutely never wants the responsibility of his own child, it's one of the few things over which Benedict can't actually blame his mother.
Because he is, in some ways, a lot like her.

"It's all right," he says, mirroring her smile with a little one of his own. "Tevinter is technically only as strong as its Altus families, but... a lot of their machinations are about gaining individual power."
He twists his mouth to one side. "It's a lot of work. And you have to really want it, I guess."

[saam]

"S'true," she says, nodding slowly. She puts a hand out for the bowl and the spoon, once he's finished. "You gotta care about anything to make it work, really want it."

So, of course, her next question shouldn't be that much a surprise. She looks him dead on. "What d'you want, Benedict?"

(Look, she finally learned his name.)

[altusimperius]

People keep asking this, but he has no idea how to answer. What does it even matter what he wants, right now?

Rather than fall into the trap of pointlessly hoping, he shrugs another shoulder and knits his brow. "I'd settle for another blanket," he admits timidly.