open

[keenly]

WHO: Colin + YOU
WHAT: Returning from the jungle
WHEN: Current
WHERE: Kirkwall
NOTES:

I. The Return

All Colin really wants at the moment is to flop down into his bed. Not because he's particularly tired, at the moment, but because he wants to be reassured that it still feels as good as he remembers. He drifts among the crowd at the docks, reunions happening all around as people greet their friends, but manages to stick closely to Athessa and limit his greetings to people he's close to. Not tired, but overwhelmed. There's an aching hollowness to him, and the pressing crowd only increases his discomfort.

II. Home

It is not Colin's presence anywhere in the Gallows that might be noted now, but his absence from it. His typical silence on the crystals and the journals now applies to his own life. For several days after returning, for as long as he can get away with claiming to be ill, he is closed up in his apartment in Hightown. If you want to speak with him, make him stop hiding, or get him to cook anything for you, you'll have to meet him here.

III. Wildcard

Comments

[keenly]

He jumps when her hand comes toward his face, even knowing it's just her, even knowing what she's doing. His hands grip the book as if it's something he can steady himself with.

"'M fine," he mumbles. Certainly to touch, he doesn't feel sick, either.

[indissection]

That clearly isn't true, and she shakes her head, dropping down to her knees to give him a careful look. She's not sure what to do about this situation - damage to the mind is hardly her area - but she smiles gently.

"I don't think so, but we can work on that." She doesn't bother getting to her feet. "We could read together if you like."

[keenly]

There's a gleam of surprise in his eyes as he realizes she's not about to call him out for not being sick, nor judge him for hiding away from the world. The fear on his face melts away to shame, his gaze falling as he nods assent, making room for her on the chaise.

[indissection]

All Sidony does is move, settling herself up beside him and reaching to take the book from his hands. Then, as she would do if she were not with someone clearly hurting from their venture, she lifts her leg and makes to place them over his, making herself comfortable - if he allows her to, of course.

"Now, where were you?"

[keenly]

He is totally not blinking rapidly against the oncoming flood of tears. Maker, he used never to cry. Now he's fighting it while placing his finger on the page where he left off. As she reads, he finds himself bending to rest his cheek against her hair--gingerly, so his whiskers don't mess it up too badly. The sound of her voice lulls his shame and fear into a fitful slumber, and he begins to breathe easily.

At the end of a chapter, he raises his head, delicately smoothing her hair back down if any of it was caught.

"Thank you," he says quietly.

[indissection]

Comfortable and at ease, Sidony reads until Colin settles and relaxes. She knows from her own rather messy mixup with kidnappings (multiple) and brushes with death (also rising in number now) that sometimes a break or a pause is the best medicine. There is nothing her studies nor her practical experience can do for Colin, but her steady company and the tenderness of their friendship might do something to ease his pain.

It surprises her to realise that she actually cares.

"Of course, darling," her voice is gentle as she turns the page. "Shall I continue?"

[keenly]

Colin nods, returning his cheek to her head. "Please."

It's another half-hour before he stirs again, finally starting to feel himself opening up again. He peers at his guest.

"I'm going to cook. Would you stay for dinner?"

[indissection]

She’s more than content with this, and the softness of the moment isn’t lost on her. When she turns her head at his words she’s almost smiling.

“I think that would be lovely. Please.”

[keenly]

He starts to go about it. By the time twenty minutes have passed, there's a hot meal for them both. Colin even opens a bottle of wine, pouring a glass for each of them. But as healing as cooking is for him, eating doesn't seem to be the reason he did it, because his food is all but untouched as he sits quietly at the table with her.

"I'm not sick," he admits after a while.

[indissection]

Sidony picks at hers, her eyes focussed on him as he stares at his own food. She does drink the wine, at least, and when he speaks she leans forward. Tenderness prickles at her - she is fond of Colin, and the respect he has for her - so she allows herself that softness.

"I did not think that you were." Her smile is softer. "Do you wish to talk about it?"

[keenly]

"Not exactly." It's always safer to keep his baggage to himself, or else she might feel like he's too weird to stick around. She's not exactly dainty, given her chosen profession, but she is definitely the noble kind of noble. He is so far beneath her, he's not sure it would take much for her to be done with him.

"When something bad happens," he says vaguely, "and I feel the world isn't safe, I sort of...stay away from it. Stay in, don't go out. Sometimes for days, sometimes for months."

[indissection]

"I imagine that is understandable," Sidony's reply is gentle enough, settling back in her chair. She's well aware that it's not something that she could necessarily recognise before she came to join Riftwatch, but now? She has burns on her skin and some scarring that cannot simply be undone; she knows better than to imagine all scars are as visible a reminder.

There's more to healing than she could have possibly imagined.

"Is that something you want to keep doing? Or something you would like to change?"

[keenly]

There's a notable widening of his eyes at the question.

"I hate it," he admits, "but it's. Sort of like, um. I hate being at sea during a storm, yes? I hate huddling down in the dark feeling ill and frightened. But I'd rather be there than up above, in the rain and lightning and wind. I'd rather be ashore, in a house that doesn't move with every little ripple of the water, but that's not an option, so I go where it's safer and hope for the best."

[indissection]

"It's a way of coping," Sidony nods her head, understanding. It makes sense; avoiding the danger of something that causes you trauma of any kind. She might be the kind of person to run head first into it - battle, marriage, anything else - but not everyone has that kind of determination.

Reaching out, she touches his hand.

"Well. If you ever wish to huddle down in the dark at least you will know that you shall have company, darling."

[keenly]

A smile blooms across his face. Most of the tension he had leaves him.

"Thank you."

[indissection]

There's still a touch of awkwardness to her, but Sidony manages a smile and a bow of her head.

"Of course, dear."