[OPEN] Interview With A Mage

[sulahnan]

WHO: Athessa and you!
WHAT: Talking to Magefriends about Magic and Abominations
WHEN: August; Post-Abomination, Pre-Modplot
WHERE: Around the Gallows
NOTES: none yet

i. colin

It's one of the days that sees Athessa helping out in the apothecary, which means busy hands but a mind free to wander. She's separating the buds from dried, woody stems to place each into jars for their individual uses when she speaks:

"I've been thinking a lot about what happened..."

ii. kostos

This isn't a conversation that is going to happen organically. After reading through some esoteric writings on magic in the library, she gives up for a time and stalks off to find Kostos.

"Oi," she calls to him, jogging to catch up with him. "Got a minute?"

iii. isaac

[ Some late night crystal call when Athessa's eyes get tired of reading ]

Isaac, can I pick your brain a bit?

iv. derrica

[ They've had their fair share of difficult conversations of late, and this one bodes no different. The kicker, of course, is that it's far more personal to Derrica than it is to Athessa, so when the latter seeks out the former, she comes bearing gifts. Little spiced cookies and coffee over ice - does Derrica drink coffee? ]

It's not spice cake, but the flavor is pretty close.

v. wildcard/bring out your mage

[ either hmu on disco or plurk and i'll make a starter for you or wildcard me, whichever! ]

Comments

[sulahnan]

"Will you tell me if I make things worse?"

It might not be as simple as it sounds, she realizes, to ask to be held accountable. But how else is she supposed to help, not hinder?

[keenly]

"Yes." Not an easy thing to promise, given how much he shies away from conflict, but better that than making her drag him back from the brink again. "But you'll always make things better more than you make them worse."

[sulahnan]

She tightens her hold on him slightly, perhaps to ward off his shaking, or just because she needs to hold onto him to be sure he's not going anywhere.

"I'm serious."

[keenly]

"So am I." The shaking is starting to abate, slowly. His cheek rests on the top of her head, heedless of her hair getting caught in his beard.

"I went to the Circle when I was eleven. My family died in the Blight when I was twelve. I always thought, the only people who will never disappear if they can help it are family; otherwise, there's always someone they'll prioritize over you. You've given me family. We are family and always will be. And that goes both ways."

[sulahnan]

Athessa sighs, and nods. It doesn't assuage her fears about the harm she might do in some dimwitted attempt to help other mages, but if nothing else, she and Colin have each other's backs.

"I love you a lot, ya know," she says. "And I'll never give up on you."

[keenly]

"I love you a lot, too," he says, rubbing her back. "You've given me hope. You understand how very much that means, now."

[sulahnan]

She understands the importance of hope, which casts a harsh light on her own hopelessness and the disgust it brought on only days prior. (Is she a liar for keeping that from him?) How can she be a bringer of hope when she has none for herself? (She's put too much on him already.)

Instead of nodding again, she turns to bury her face in his shirt and nuzzles into him roughly. With accompanying sound effects, too. Scrub away whatever face she's wearing to replace it with a fresh one, and growl out unspoken emotions to cleanse the palate. But also, now her face will smell like his shirt, which smells of fresh and dried herbs, hearth smoke, and the peculiar scent of magic. That, she thinks, is what home smells like.

"Okay, okay," she declares, half muffled as she pulls away. "Back to work. Yeah? We can get mushy later."

[keenly]

It's time to extract curly hair from his beard, and he lovingly puts it back in place, smoothing it down over her head. A thought occurs to him, and his hands travel down the sides of her face to cup her cheeks.

"Yes. And. I've promised I'm not going anywhere. I still mean it. All right?"

[sulahnan]

She smiles, the expression highlighting just how close she'd come to losing her left eye in Churneau. Leander had pointed it out long after she'd considered that possibility, but now especially, with the line drawn in red and bordered in fading purples, it's impossible to miss. Not inches, but mere millimetres higher and it would've been so much worse.

Which isn't what Athessa thinks about it, because she doesn't really care right now.

"Alright."