faderift | It's a fool who plays it cool

At least she doesn't have to contend with speaking a completely different language - she appreciates the understanding of Trade that people here have, and thankful she had seen fit to understand it well herself.

Glancing at Jude, her own expression softens, just for a moment. It's nice, to be able to make a friend.

Nodding, she turns back down to her paper to continue to right.

I will speak with you, when I am able. I do not mind who people are or what they do. I want to learn.

Jude is sensitive to that moment of softness, and it eases something in him that he didn't realize he was holding onto so very tightly.

It is nice. Having someone look for him, know him, enjoy being around him. He's felt the pain of the lack.

"As long as you're patient with me," he says, "I'd like to learn your signs, too."

But there is one more thing, something that he's finding not everyone looks kindly upon, and he prefers her to know, rather than surprise her with it later.

"Should warn, though-" he pauses, wondering how best to phrase it. "I don't always look like this."

Tofa already misses the comfort of home, the way it felt to be around people who understood her, in both movement and language, but at least she is making a place here. It's making her just a little bit more comfortable here, which before she might well have been bereft of.

Lifting her head, she manages a smile, something a little warmer before she begins to write, her handwriting chicken scratch.

I will try and teach you. I do not think it is hard.

Pausing, she tilts her head, letting her eyes flick over him.

What do you look like?

"Willing to learn."

Jude spreads his hands with a smile, which turns a touch... not apprehensive, but like he's bracing himself for the inevitable strangeness that'll need to be overcome.

"I'm a wolf shifter," he says simply, without preamble or games. "Sometimes, I look like a big, almost-black wolf with yellow eyes. I'm the same person, just furrier."

The legends of werewolves losing control and becoming slavering beasts on the full moon are a little more real here than he would've liked, so he feels it's important to make that distinction.

Thank you.

Tofa holds onto the parchment until he's done talking, watching his face with a tilt of her own head. It's not the strangest thing she's heard, and given the oddness of the people in Riftwatch it's the least of her concerns.

Leaning over her paper, she shifts a little, handwriting a chicken scratch.

You keep your mind? You must be a good hunter.

It's as simple as that.

"My pack taught me well."

It's both that simple and that complicated. Jude smooths his hand over the tabletop, physically grounding himself in that clear statement like a manta. Jude has other gifts, things that make him harder to shake than the others, but without the good foundation his pack taught him to build, he could well be lost.

"You've heard of shifters?"

It takes her a moment, and her hands move absently almost as if she's forgotten he can't quite understand her - but then she is reaching for the paper again and beginning to write.

Mages can turn into many beasts. Is it similar to that?

Leaning back, her head tilts, looking at him up and down for a moment.

Shift. Turn. Same thing?

He follows her signs as if that's all he's going to get, determined to grasp what he can and contextualize what he can't.

It's the question that makes him frown, though, wondering if there's a bigger difference between the words, a significance he's never had to contemplate before. There are no mages where he is- only the old stories of werewolves and curses. Things rooted in truth but distorted into poor shades of reality. His people aren't monsters, but they can be monstrous. Everyone can.

"Similar in that I can change my form, yeah. But I'm not human. I never was." He pauses, trying to think of how to explain that concept to someone who hasn't lived it.

"Shifters aren't our animals, and we aren't our humans." He pauses again, because that also isn't right. He can feel the stretching inside of him, his wolf baring his teeth in a panting laugh. He doesn't understand the human issue of needing to explain. They simply are. Humans make things too complicated.

"I should say, we aren't just our animals, or just our humans. We are two minds, two sets of instincts, that are both the same person at the same time."

Jude pauses again, breaking down with laughter at himself and reaching up to rub his hand over his face.

"I'm realizing," he mutters, "that I've never had to explain this before."

Edited 2022-07-03 17:14 (UTC)

You are both.

It seems a simple enough idea for Tofa. To be two things in one is the same as being an Avaar and a hunter, of being a mage and a person from a particular town, city or nation. They coexist and thus it doesn't really seem to baffle her as much as it might have been expected to.

Shaking her head, she waves her hand for a moment before she gives herself a brief time to consider, thoughtful. It makes sense to her, because magic and strangeness is becoming familiar to her the more time she spends with Riftwatch.

Her sister had been engaged to a queen from another world; very little might be strange after that.

Do you choose which form you take? Is it that simple?

There are nuances, but those will come later, if she keeps company with him long enough. But for now, he breaks into a sudden and very warm smile, happy for the understanding. He clasps his hands together on the tabletop, presses the tips of his thumbs together, and gestures to her with a nod.

Yes. She gets it.

"I do. It hurts if I change too fast, but it's not hard. I can do it on purpose, like moving my arm-" he does so, to demonstrate- "but it can come on by instinct, too. You startle somebody, they jump. Sometimes we jump into fur. Our pups start shifting as soon as they start saying their first words, taking their first steps."

Jude's voice softens instantly when he talks about pups.

It's endearing, the way he softens, the way that he cares. Tofa has never been particularly maternal herself, but there's no denying the fact that someone who cares enough to protect others, or want to protect them, sits well with her.

She had lost her tongue for the chance to protect others, so she can enjoy the way she sees herself reflected in others.

Reaching for her papers, she nods her head, writing carefully.

It is part of you, like magic, like breathing. I understand. I look forward to seeing how you appear in your other form, if I can, one day.

Jude watches her write again, watching her face as much as the words. He hasn't felt much peace since he's been here, but he already knows that he wants to talk to Tofa more. And in ways that mean she doesn't have to scratch out every word.

"You will," he answers, utterly assured. "And you'll know when it's me."

It will be very difficult to miss, and Jude doesn't hide his form away when it comes to Riftwatch. Soon, there'll be tales told of a monstrous wolf among their ranks.

"Do you have time to teach some signs? What's most important?"

Her smile in return is gentle as she nods her head - and she is genuine in looking forward to seeing him. She's never seen anyone turn from one shape to another, so she's glad that there might be a chance for it in the future.

The request makes her pause, though, blinking, before her expression transforms into something even softer. Not many people have tried to match her language like this before, and it's clear she appreciates it.

Quickly, she writes down a series of words in order - Tofa. Hello. Goodbye. Thank you. - then, one by one, signs them out in front of him, fingers moving into different shapes.

Jude is an attentive student. It's clear that he's learning because he wants to understand her in particular, but there's a look in his eyes that says he's thinking beyond this.

He puts his all into learning the signs that she teaches him, putting them together and signing them back, stringing them together as needed. He finds the humor in his mistakes, laughing at himself when he messes up before trying all the harder to get it right.

By the time they take a break, Jude's shoulders are loose and he's got an ease to his grin that he didn't start with.

"We use hand signs for perimeter security back home. Up north, there's a pack operating half in sign language. They've got a pup there who doesn't say much, but he signs up a storm. All the pups picked it up quick, and then the sentries, and then the ones who have a hard time being in skin instead of fur."

There are a lot of different types of wounds. Sometimes, you stumble into how to best help someone.

"Here's ours for safe, all clear."

His hands move- they're sentry signs, smaller movements, mostly just fingers, meant to be able to flash behind a back or without attracting attention.

"This one's for friendly, incoming and more to see, stay alert."

Edited 2022-07-05 16:52 (UTC)

Tofa appreciates the fact that he seems to be paying attention, and she is careful with her lessons. Each word has the action repeated at least a handful (hah) of times until she is confident that he has picked up the basics.

It's not enough to have a full conversation, but it is a start, and it warms her from the inside out.

When he begins his own explanation she pays attention, watching the way his own fingers move and copying them as he does so, nodding her head.

Safe. All clear. Friendly. See. Alert.

Nodding alone, she reaches for her papers.

I will use these. I hunt, so they will be useful. Good, easy signs.

They keep going. It's easy to pass the time like this, to get that familiarity without over-saturating, keeping it simple.

Some of their signs are remarkably similar, enough to make Jude smile, and others he knows he'll be tripped up over without practice.

Hide. Weapon. Above. Below. Happy. Home.

Jude pauses, signing back fragments of what she's writing on the paper. Good, useful. Hunt. At this rate they'll have an amalgam of signs for themselves.

He signs to her then, fragments of ideas that make up a question.

When - you - hunt?

Some signs are more obvious than others, even between different worlds and cultures. There are only so many movements of fingers, only so many ways you can gesture and point, so it comes around eventually to being almost identical.

It's enough that Tofa is almost beaming - or as much as she can with her carefulness with her mouth, lips pressed tight together but the corners of her lips moving up just a little bit. It's the biggest smile she can give.

Nodding along to the movement of his fingers, she continues to write out her words before she lets her fingers follow along.

When I can. When food is needed. For fun.

She lifts her shoulder in a shrug.

To practice fighting.

Fun. Food. Fight.

They're all good words to add, and he keeps his attention on them rather than what Tofa does with her mouth, but he notices that she keeps her lips pressed together, even in her joy. It comes through in her eyes easily enough.

"Those are my reasons, too." Jude nods, thoughtful again.

"It's good for my wolf to run. It settles everything to feel the earth under my paws. If you'll have me, I'd like to go with you sometime."

Tofa watches him watch her hands and she makes a concentrated effort to slow the motions, to allow it to settle into communication but at his speed. It could help him learn, especially with how he quickly he has picked things up already.

Leaning back a little, she nods her head.

I will hunt with you. Wolf or man? I do not mind.

It's difficult at first, given that he's exercising brand-new knowledge, but it's all fresh in his mind. He appreciates her going slow, and nods back.

Signs wolf.

"It's awkward, trying to catch something with human teeth."

Signing wolf back is easy enough, and Tofa nods along before she leans back, thinking.

I have not hunted here yet. Have you? Do you know the land?

"I don't."

It seems to intrigue rather than daunt him. He often traveled back home. Now, he seeks any opportunity to range wider, to find anything familiar and grow more and more enchanted with what isn't.

"I'm looking forward to learning it."

You will have an advantage.

Being a wolf will make things easier - the smells, the tracks, all of it. Tofa can read the ground as well as a scholar can read a book, but only some things are open to her. She is not a wolf.

I am excited.

It's a fool who plays it cool

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