and then I passed out in the snow

[motherfucking_ghost]

WHO: Church, the poor sobs trying to train or are nearby
WHAT: Someone got a crossbow at the suggestion of some spirit inhabiting a boy. It's got a trigger! See this for basically the gist.
WHEN: tbh a couple of afternoons in late Wintermarch. "today" mostly
WHERE: Training grounds (for bows, not the swordy part)
NOTES: There can be arrows to the knees injuries of the bow type if you'd really like, though it would be through hilarious and dangerous accident

Crossbows. Yeah, that sounded up his alley, the closest thing to a gun. He'd have to thank whatshisface. Cole. Yeah. Thank that tall squirrely kid. Church picked a basic, simple version from the armorer, a couple of bolts, and headed down to the training grounds where all those people practice with their weapons in safe-ish environments.

Okay, now, granted he should probably have told someone. Someone more in charge, maybe. But what's the point if you can't come down and train whenever you want? Huh? Obviously not everyone needs some teacher looming over their shoulder. He misses having a sight, though. Misses his rifle. Misses...a lot of things.

The shitty thing about missing targets though is that, well, bolts are kind of a finite resource. So are bullets, but he doesn't usually have to go hunting for them after. They end up...places. Places where bolts should not generally land, when one is hitting a target. No matter how he adjusts his stance, his sighting, his...literally anything, he never hits the goddamn target. If anyone watches him, there is not a single time a bolt hits at anything he's pointing at/aiming for. They sure end up in walls, and trees, and other targets somehow that aren't the one he's aiming at.

Someone maybe should stop him before he breaks his weapon or hurts someone.

Comments

[chainlightning]

The training grounds isn't really somewhere that Merrill spends a lot of time. Mostly, she feels like she's in the way; everyone is swinging about large swords or sharp daggers, while she has a staff that she does magic with and can, if needed, hit someone over the head with or trip them. Mages need practice too, of course, but Merrill has always preferred to do it away from large groups if not busy running around Kirkwall getting regularly attacked by things.

Still, the grounds are rather difficult to miss. Watching Varric with his crossbow, Merrill may have said the same thing about targets, but she's seen enough young elves try to learn how to use the bow that Church's plight looks familiar and makes her a bit sympathetic. He may be a grown adult, but it's difficult to learn new skills by yourself.

One bolt manages to ricochet off stone; Merrill deflects it with a barrier, no worse for wear, and then goes to pick it up. "Here's one!"

[motherfucking_ghost]

He can just hear Tucker making some dumb commentary right now. Something about hey maybe if he'd worked this hard with his guns he could've hit something now and again. Shut up, brain-Tucker.

But he's not trying to hit people, so when another bolt goes awry and almost hits a girl, he puts the bow down. "Holy shit, are you okay? Did you...did you just magic it away?"

[chainlightning]

Even though she knows she wasn't hit, Merrill looks down at herself anyway. Nope, definitely not hit. When she looks back up, she's smiling, the bolt in her hand from when she scooped it up. "I'm fine! I didn't really magic it away, but I used magic to put a barrier around myself. It takes more than one crossbow bolt to get through it, thank the Creators."

Otherwise, Kirkwall would have been even more messy, really. Still, it's nice of him to be concerned. Now that he's put the bow down, she feels perfectly comfortable coming over to hand the bolt back, too.

[motherfucking_ghost]

She's such a tiny, skinny thing. Oh, yeah, sure, all elves are basically like that, but she just seems so small and dainty. And upbeat. And vaguely Scottish? He takes the bolt with a nod, trying not to look embarrassed. "A decent suit of armor would do the same thing, but I guess magic's kind of easier, huh? Like, for doing stuff. Kinda get that having magic isn't exactly a joyride here, but--you know what I mean. Wish I could just wave my hand and make a barrier that could stop bullets. Arrows. Whatever."

Sure would've maybe kept him from dying. A couple of times. Dying sucks ass.

[chainlightning]

Perhaps it's the travel, the alienage living -- it's different than living with a Dalish clan, after all, and not many opportunities for feasts. Not that Merrill thinks most here have had feasts recently, but still. Her appearance doesn't hurt her at all, at least, or rather no more than it hurts any other elf for being an elf.

"It's easier to move without all that metal on, too," she giggles, but nods. "But different mages have different talents. I can't heal at all; barriers are the closest I get. Some mages can't do barriers but are very good with ice. But you can always practice -- most people just decide to focus on what they're good at." Or what is most familiar, in the case of this Rifter. "Er- is there magic, where you're from?"

[metaari]

Target practice is where Metaari likes to go when he needs to get away for a bit and clear his mind. It isn't necessarily somewhere he has to be--he's pretty damn good with his bow already, thank you very much. But it helps to calm him down or to take him away from thoughts for a while, so it's a necessity from time to time.

Of course, it's a little harder to concentrate when there's someone who doesn't quite know what they're doing. By the time a third bolt hits his target, one at least three down from where the culprit is firing from, Metaari finally lowers his bow and glances down the line. A few others have already left, undoubtedly grumbling the whole time, and there aren't many moving targets left.

Probably a good thing.

"Oi," he finally calls out, turning to face the man. He eyes the crossbow warily for a moment, wondering how dangerous that thing might wind up being in those hands. "Green bean. You're about to shoot someone's eye out with that thing."

[motherfucking_ghost]

Church huffs, aiming down the kind of not really sights (god he misses! his! rifle!) for a moment before pointing it back downward so he can look at the big guy. Big. Big guy. These bull qunari people, seriously, what kind of steroids are they born with? "Well, that's gonna be the idea if I run into anyone I have to shoot, yeah. I'm not exactly trying to do that right now, obviously."

[metaari]

Metaari raises an eyebrow and glances slowly from the man, to the target he was apparently aiming at, and then back at him again before biting back a grin. Starting out can be rough. He gets that. He was new to it once, too. Can't go ribbing someone for trying. "And ideally, that will be someone you're actually aiming at. But I think hitting a stationary target might be the first goal, hm?"

He rubs the back of his head and eyes the crossbow for a moment. Metaari doesn't particularly have a lot of experience with them, he prefers a recurve, but still... "You need help?"

[motherfucking_ghost]

"It can't be that hard." Is that an answer to Metaari, or is he grumbling to himself? ...Yes. "It should be just aim and shoot. I'm used to that." He's also used to missing damn near every shot, shhh. Let him have his delusions. "Think a sword would be easier? What's so hard about 'swish swish stab'?"

Dear god now he's directly quoting Tucker. Tucker. He's finally gone insane. Next thing is he'll start missing Caboose. Then he'll know to lock himself up.

[metaari]

Metaari glances down at his own bow and he lifts it up, turning toward the targets once more. He knocks an arrow and draws it back, poised for just a moment before he lets the arrow fly. It burrows itself into the dummy's eye a moment later and he glances sideways toward the man again with a faint shrug.

"It took me ten years of daily practice to be able to do that consistently. Yes. It is that hard. Now, the be competent enough to make sure you're always hitting the guys attacking you somewhere? ...Mm, a few weeks." He pauses, considers. "Less, if you're serious about it. I might be able to recommend using a sword, but that whole group tends to be a bit... uptight."

[aceso]

Why couldn't it be a quiet day? Christine likes quiet days when no one is hurt and she can just relax and focus on her spirit healer studies. But today is not a quiet day. It's a day where a soldier comes running to the healer tents, shouting about some mad man with no idea how to fire a crossbow firing wildly at targets and not hitting a one.

"Maker have mercy," Christine says, closing her book and hurrying to gather a satchel of supplies before hurrying that way. Surely someone is going to be struck by a bolt. But when she gets down there and sees Church and the spread of bolts he's in the middle of retrieving, she can't help but laugh.

"What is all this? Why are the bolts so far from the target?"

[motherfucking_ghost]

Oh no. Oh no. Don't get distracted by pretty ladies, Church, you got this. At least he's not actually aiming at anything right now and is just slamming another failed bolt away. "Uh. I can explain." Is it going to sound good? "It's because I keep missing the target." No it is not. "Because I'm- I'm just not used to this crude level of technology! It's really different, okay!"

[aceso]

Her amusement can't really be dimmed, especially when he starts explaining himself. She's come to realize that whenever Church opens his mouth, he just digs himself a deeper hole.

"Is the aiming part really so different?" she asks, coming closer. "I know little of these matters, but it must somehow translate to what you are used to using, no?"

[motherfucking_ghost]

It's a gift. Curse. "Well, I mean, the gun--the weapon I had before was meant to be used at long distances. I mean long distance, like, farther than I'm pretty sure you could fire an arrow from like a skilled marksman sort of person. Very high tech." When he remembered how to make it zoom. "Very steady weapon, too. This has a...degree of error to it that I'm trying to compensate for." He waves a hand up in the air. "And the wind's got an impact, too. I didn't have to worry about something like that before!"

[aceso]

"Mmm. It kicks, does it not? And you've been readjusting." Her smirk is back in place. She simply can't help it. He is so far off from the target!

"Perhaps you should have an instructor."

[onlyhymns]

Cade comes to the archery range on a fairly regular basis, and he seems to find peace there in the repetitive motions, the satisfying 'thuck' of the arrow hitting the target, the ability to lose himself in the process.
And now here's some jackass ruining everything. He's making noise, hitting everywhere but his target, and just being a general nuisance, and Cade spends a good half hour caught between trying to ignore him and shooting him dirty looks.

Finally, when a crossbow bolt hits his target, Cade has had enough. "Are you even supposed to have that?" he snaps, his voice as quiet and hoarse as it is severe, "do you even know what you're trying to do?" Few things are more annoying than a bad crossbowman, especially when the civilized people are trying to practice on their civilized bows.

[motherfucking_ghost]

"Members of the Inquisition," he starts as if reciting, and as if he's a member of the Inquisition, "are allowed to be armed with basic weaponry at no charge." Like, what are they gonna do, charge these poor and homeless people and runaway desperate soldiers who wanna take up arms for something they could probably make themselves? Sounds like something the UNSC would do. Church marches over grouchily to Cade's target and plucks the errant bolt out. "What does it look like I'm trying to do, numbnuts? Obviously I'm trying to figure out how to aim this stupid fucking thing so I can hit my own god damn target."

[onlyhymns]

Numbnuts. Did this man just call him Numbnuts? Cade purses his lips in a furious frown, but, being the rather non-confrontational type on the best of days, he's not about to start insulting back.

"Well... be a little more careful," he grumbles, "and maybe try aiming. You're going to kill someone."

[motherfucking_ghost]

"That's the general idea for when I gotta kneecap a zombie swamp demon. Not exactly trying to take someone out right now. I'm not shooting blind." Even if, sometimes, it might seem that way. He's genuinely not. He's just...bad...at this. But fuck if he'll admit it. No way! He shot the Meta before! And he totally would've shot him with a fucking rocket to the face if he hadn't temporally displaced himself!

But try explaining things like that to people who probably didn't have the word 'rocket' in their vernacular. (Or to people who didn't think it counted, Washington.)

[onlyhymns]

Cade stares at him for another long moment, but this time he's trying to parse what a zombie is, then he shakes it is. "Well you're going to, if you don't slow down," he replies, still grumpily. "Just... take a minute, make sure your arm's steady and the bolt's facing the target." And please don't shoot me next.

[foxsays]

Bows have problems. They're not easy to hide or smuggle about your person unless you're tall and broad and can hide them, arrows rattle and you have to actually make them, and aiming is nowhere near as easy as it is with a pistol. You don't just point and shoot because anyone with a pistol can be deadly whereas a random person with a bow is just as likely to shoot themselves in the foot as they are to shoot you.

But having any ranged weapon would be good, would help her feel less exposed and useless and so she's been practicing during her free time.

Pistols also don't have bowstrings that might some back and hit you in the mouth, leaving you with a nice big welt down part of your face.

Only before she goes, she can't stop herself from watching Church because that...well it's something and she's glad that she's not up and about on the walls right now because she can imagine one or two in an ankle, a hand, maybe her back depending on where she'd be and how she's moving.

"Amico," she calls, keeping well out of any possible area that might be a target, "Skyhold needs little help where crumbling walls are concerned!"

[motherfucking_ghost]

Things Church is gettin' real tired of: the sound of the crossbow releasing a bolt. Things Church welcomes: the sound of his bolt hitting at least an actual target if not his own, Araceli's voice. He remembers to aim his weapon down and away from anyone and keep his finger off the trigger when he's not paying attention to shooting. That much he remembers from basic, please.

"I'd use a wrecking ball instead if I really wanted to tear this place--whoa, what happened to your face?"

[foxsays]

"There are places where a stiff breeze might do it." Now isn't the time to point out that she doesn't know what a wrecking ball is exactly, certainly not when someone is struggling with a crossbow.

"The bowstring decided to snap. In my face. At full draw." She should probably slip out the gates and grab some ice to hold against it but that feels almost like defeat. "Have I mentioned today that I hate not having a gun? Because I do. A bow is never going to have the range or the accuracy of a gun, and a gun has never decided to slap me in the mouth."

[motherfucking_ghost]

"Yeaaaah... Look, have you seen some of the holes in the roof? People are totally gonna catch some deadly cold or like black plague thing if it rains or if it's too cold or something."

Hey, maybe the crossbow is struggling with him, ever think about that?

"Dude. That's balls. That's gonna be a bruise for a couple days probably. I mean, at least it didn't break your nose, or like, take out an eye? Don't be so sure about the mouthslapping thing, though. If you don't hold a gun right that's got a lot of kick, you'll lose some teeth or worse. Still way better than any of this bow and arrow shit." He considers the crossbow for a moment. "Maybe I should just get a sword, but then you gotta get up close and personal..."

[foxsays]

"I go up on the roof, and the walls on either side, I don't think I've ever walked from one end of the courtyard to the other on the ground if I don't have to. If I were bigger than I am and not so good at the running? I would have gone through many times. And they still have healing tents." Fresh air yes. Inside a building. With windows that can close instead of a tent where the cold creeps up from the ground to steal all the warmth left in your body.

Maybe Korrin can kiss it better for her when it stops hurting just so much. "I prefer smaller guns I can conceal on my person, it helps with balance too for climbing, you don't need something big slowing you down too much." Not that she doesn't have some but they don't really go out and about with her unless there's a real reason to take them. "A blade will always be my first love though, maybe because there's nothing quite like a duel. Doing it with pistols isn't as fun, you need to get close and show them you have no fear."