{ OPEN } i'll do what it takes

[serannas]

WHO: Ellana Ashara + OPEN + closed starters for some
WHAT: Catching friends up on recent events/important meetings/random day in the life stuff
WHEN: The latter part of Drakonis, and spanning the entirety of Cloudreach; for the open section, please let me know what day or week so I can keep my time lines straight?
WHERE: around Skyhold

{ open throughout cloudreach; please specify date or week in the subject header }
The new month will hopefully be a reprieve from all the chaos of the last month. Every issue has been a learning experience for her, and that is really the only positive thing she can take from most of what's happened. She's never wished to walk around with eyes closed, and yet now she realizes she must have been, because some of what's happened has certainly opened her eyes. And that's starting to change her. In order to become more worldly, she needs to be less ignorant of the world. To be the type of person who abandons hope for cynicism has no appeal to her, but moving forward she definitely will keep a closer eye on things, and allow herself a cynical thought every now and again. To survive this world, she doesn't need to completely shed who she is, but she needs to be more aware.

On the surface, she appears to be the same. She can be found in varied locations sitting with her lute and an open songbook. Her brow is often furrowed in concentration as she places her fingers on the strings and strums a few chords. Other times she sets the book aside and plays the songs she now has memorized, only tripping up once or twice. If not out with her lute, she's usually spotted with a book, and the subject could be anything: what little is known about elven ruins, books on politics and debate, and even a volume of an encyclopedia on animals, as she reads through their traits to see what would suit her needs.

If she's simply out walking, there's an inexplicable smile gracing her lips that she doesn't realize is there. It makes her look like she's daydreaming, though she's in no danger of walking into a pole. It's just the smile of someone in the throes of a new romance, and very little can erase it when she's thinking of that special someone.

{ drakonis 16th: kallian }
The two had spoken at the soiree about meeting up to perform together the next day, and Ellana sends Kallian a crystal message once she's made sure the tower she's picked is abandoned. It's not that they can't perform in front of others, as Kallian showed last night, but it would be nice to have the privacy to perfect a song and just to talk as well. Ellana's still brimming with excitement over the confession of feelings she and Felix both gave the other, and as Ellana waits for her friend with her lute sat in her lap, there's a bright smile on her face, remembering that kiss.

{ drakonis 18th: sina, beleth }
Ellana doesn't want certain people to hear about her and Felix from third parties because of how they might react. The last thing she wants is for them to think she intentionally kept this from them. However, it takes her several days after the soiree to both work up the courage and find the time. So much seems to be happening at once in Skyhold, and she needs to get into the right head space for talking about a very sensitive topic. The first she goes to find is Sina, because Ellana knows she can be more easily found. She's usually in the gardens or her tent in the gardens, so she makes her way there to look.

Once things have been discussed with Sina, Ellana needs a little break, but then goes to find Beleth. She's the one person in Clan Ashara that Ellana feels might really be against this, but it's hard to know for sure since their interests have taken them in different directions since arriving at Skyhold and they don't speak much. And that makes her harder for Ellana to track down. Finally, she pulls out her crystal and contacts her.

"Beleth? Are you busy?"

{ late drakonis: benevenuta }
Ellana's goal at the soiree had been to not allow the nobles to get away with talking down to her, and in that area, she succeeded as much as she'd been able. Her refusal to either act demure or angry had confused the lot of them, because in their narrow-minded views, an elf could only be a timid servant or an angry savage, not someone who treated nobles as average: neither as someone superior or as a threat to be eliminated.

It had satisfied Ellana, but she knows moving forward that having confidence and being able to bat away derogatory remarks is only part of what she should be doing. At the last meeting of the Mage Council, she'd been lost, and had sat in silence for the latter part of the discussion. She needs to understand how to better navigate politics, and who better than a noble to whom politics comes as second nature? She asks to meet with Benevenuta in private, and like with their mage meetings, she arranges a tea set and some snacks. It's not as well done as one of the Circle mages would have prepared it, but she's done her best.

{ early cloudreach: sam }
They had discussed metalworking over the crystals while Sam was off in Emprise and Ellana was admiring the ring he'd crafted for her back at Skyhold. He'd said he'd teach her how to make designs in metal and she'd figured why not? There are so many things she has yet to try, and he'd said they would just use scrap metal, so she isn't too concerned about being wasteful. One day she goes to look for him at the forge, the air heavy with heat and the light dim inside the armory. But there he is, and thankfully there isn't a crowd of people around either. She doesn't want to get in anyone's way while they're crafting important things.

"Hello, Sam," she greets, already fanning her face in the heat. "What are you making?"

{ late cloudreach: morrigan }
A few days after the soiree, Ellana had sat down with Morrigan and discussed if the latter would teach the former shapeshifting. Ellana had explained her reasons for wanting to learn this specialization and Morrigan agreed to it. She'd been sent off to do plenty of research on the subject, and throughout the rest of Drakonis and into the next month, Ellana had slowly made her way through the readings to get herself into the right mindset.

Now the time has finally come for the practical part of the lesson. Ellana and Morrigan venture outside of Skyhold and down into the valley below, past the refugee camps and into the solitude of the mountains so Ellana can observe the wildlife and learn to copy an animal's soul. She is pretty set on a bird being her first form. To become a bird means she'll be able to see the world from above and can scout out areas on missions. It also means a quick escape if she finds herself in trouble. Here in the mountains, she expects to find brown or gray birds -- perfect for not attracting unwanted attention. As the pair enter under the eaves of the trees, Ellana can hear the songs of plenty of birds, so it shouldn't be hard to study one.

{ late cloudreach: korrin }
Once Ellana unlocks the way to shapeshift, it's an amazing thing. At first she sticks to the ground, learning how to hop along as a bird, but a stray cat coming towards her forces her to spread her wings and take flight. It's awkward at first, but she keeps at it, fluttering between several trees near the stables. Then she grows more brave and lands on the barn roof. Soon she's sailing around Skyhold to land on parapets and banner poles. When she spots Korrin, she figures she ought to let her know she's chosen shapeshifting as a specialization over rift magic, but she doesn't want to give her the shock of her life by shifting back in front of her. She flies into the barn, up to the hayloft, where she turns back into an elf, clothes and all. Then she climbs down and jogs after her friend.

"Korrin! I have some exciting news."

Comments

[serannas]

"How long did it take you?" she asks, continuing on without looking up.

[el_tybs]

"I learned when I was younger, which took months. I had to relearn some of it when I got to Haven. I had a lot more time then so a couple weeks, give or take." How long ago that felt now.

[serannas]

"I'm not sure how much time I can devote to it with everything else going on..." Ellana trails off and focuses on doing a short, straight section before adding, "It will likely take me months too. But I'm not looking to start selling art pieces. These lessons can happen infrequently."

[el_tybs]

"It's understandable and I figured as much. We're all a bit busy right now. You're also learning shapeshifting, which seems like something you should focus more on." This was just for Ellana's benefit to learn, just because she could, not because she had to - a hobby she could just enjoy.

"You're doing very well for your first lesson."

[serannas]

"You think so?" Her head tilts to examine her line making skills, and then she smirks at him. "You're being kind."

[el_tybs]

"I'm not one to say something negative from a lady with a hammer and who can fling magic," he corrects, all in good humor and teasing. "I never said it looked 'good'."

[serannas]

"Then you choose your words well." She carries on until her hands start to hurt, and then she sets down both rod and hammer to crack her knuckles.

"This is a nice metal. What is it?"

[el_tybs]

Sam chuckles at the praise, bowing just a little bit.

After a time he can see that the work is starting to bother her, and glad that she chooses to stop instead of press on. At seeing Ellana crack her knuckles he has the need to do so as well, wiggling his fingers afterward.

"It's what's left of the blue vitriol from the Fallow Mire, and a bit of iron. Decently strong metal, but the easiest to work with. Feeling more confident with the hammer?"

[serannas]

"I think so," she replies, leaning back in her chair a little to survey her work. "Will you be able to melt this again and reuse it? I'm afraid I don't know much about metals."

[el_tybs]

"Well there's enough surface on it for you to practice for a while, but yes. I'll be able to melt it down and reform it for this particular use. It's easy to do for something like this. Armor and weapons are more difficult because of the other materials usually with them and taking them apart." There was also to consider you needed to add more metal if there was parts missing to make up the difference. "It won't get wasted, don't worry."

[serannas]

"Have you ever burned yourself?" she asks, thinking on how dangerous metalworking must be. Here she hasn't even been involved in the heating process and she's managed to smack her hand already.

[el_tybs]

"All the time. I did more so while I was learning. Now, I only get burned from time to time, it's part of the job." Even though he says that there is a distinct lack of scars on his arms. "Being able to heal helps a lot. Still hurts initially, and it's never been bad enough for me not to heal it."

[serannas]

Ellana nods her understanding. "That's useful. I'm afraid I don't know any healing spells." There are plenty of spells she still doesn't know, due to a lackluster education. But at least now she has a specialization to focus on.

"What made you interested in being a healer?"

[el_tybs]

"Have you considered learning a bit? Well... when you have more free time of course." She was learning a new magic after all.

Sam smiles at the question, reaching over to grab the rod she had put down and twirling it a bit in his fingers. "I wasn't at first. I was only learning the different magics... more interested in fire. It wasn't until my affinity for spirit magic and they started teaching me to be a healer that I grew interested."

[serannas]

"I've considered it many times," she answers with a sigh. "I've always put it off because I've been so busy." And she has a feeling that will come back to haunt her someday. Someday, someone will be bleeding on the field of battle and she'll be able to do nothing but press a cloth to the wound, feeling useless.

Ellana watches him twirl the rod with a faint smile. "I'm a natural at fire spells. But you're saying they wanted you to be a healer and you didn't start enjoying it until after they made you?"

[el_tybs]

"Well a lot of mages don't know healing magic," he offers, noting the expression on her face with the sigh. "I wouldn't fret over it too much. Just a suggestion on something you might wanna learn when you aren't as busy."

Looking up from his hand he returns the small smile, giving a bit of a shrug as well. "To be honest, I wasn't looking to be a 'mage' in the first place - I was a blacksmith's son. Being able to use fire was helpful, but it scared my family that I might end up with Templars coming for me one day.

I was starting to learn about my magic so it wasn't like I knew being a certain mage was a thing. But yes, the Circle wanted me to be a healer and I grew into it."

[serannas]

"In the clan, mages are meant to be taught how to be leaders. They learn all the elven lore we've managed to preserve, and all the magic they'll need to protect they clan." Her eyes dart away, and she busies herself with tracing her lines in the metal with her fingertip.

"I wasn't taught the same things as Pel or Sorrel. I was just taught the basics. I was... neglected, as a mage. But I certainly had freedoms with magic that I don't think many Circle mages had. Still, the Keeper told me I could make quick work of lighting the fires with my magic. In that way, my role was decided for me too."

[el_tybs]

"No, I suppose you had some freedoms that a Circle mage did not, but the same probably can be said the other way around. Everyone is taught or learns different, but we're all given the basics and have the means to progress our skills." Dalish mages had a lot of freedoms, but at the same time they were only allowed so many at a time, right?

"I understand that with the Dalish it is important that everyone has a role... but you're so much more than a fire starter, Ellana. You're very talented."

[serannas]

Dalish mages certainly didn't have the strict regimen of the Circle, but neither did they have access to all those books on spells and magical theory, nor the same lessons a mage in a Tower learned.

Her gaze lifts, and it's clear his words have had an effect on her. She presses her lips together and looks away, eyes glistening in the firelight coming from the forge.

"Ma serannas. I-- I've always wanted more. To be more." She shifts in her chair and forces a laugh, pressing the back of her hand under her nose for a moment. "Sorry. Finding such kindness here means so much to me. Just the other day, a city elf said she admired me, and it just feels so good to know that the stories people tell aren't always true. Not all humans hate elves. Not all city elves resent the Dalish. It's been wonderful."

[el_tybs]

"You don't have to be sorry." He shifts in his chair as well to face Ellana better, arms folding on the table as thinks about what she said for a moment. "A lot of people focus a lot on the bad side of things. I'm sure there is some basis to what is said, but people don't always tend to be exactly how they're painted out to be." Course then there were those who wanted the stories to be true.

"You've certainly done a lot since coming to the Inquisition. Mage council. Fancy soirees. Shapeshifting..." Only to name a few really.

[serannas]

Here Ellana has been learning how to better hide her emotions, and one compliment has her crying like an oversensitive fool. Oh, well. There is always a need for more practice, isn't there?

"I've wanted to do everything," she says with a short laugh. The clan had left her feeling stunted. Like she was trapped in a life she could never really embrace, or properly fit.

"At least I'm rarely ever bored."

[el_tybs]

Probably something important to learn, but honestly she shouldn't try and hide her emotions all the time. Not with friends at least. Course himself he could do without blushing so much at times.

"There is certainly a lot to do around here. If you want to learn I say go ahead and see about doing so." He was certainly doing that. Learning what he could while it was available. "What else have you had your eye on?"

[serannas]

"Hmm, let's see." She sits back in her chair, the question helping to focus her attention elsewhere and drying up her tears.

"Playing the lute, various exercises to better read people and situations, dance lessons, and I've been giving elven language lessons too."

[el_tybs]

"You've been teaching elven? To who?" The rest of it is quite interesting, but this one in particular has his interest. He may or may not be interested in learning himself. Not like there were quite a number of elves in the Inquisition.

[serannas]

"Oh, to Eirlys, mainly. You might know her, since she's a healer. She wants to know more about her elven heritage, so I've started teaching her. And there's a rifter, Ariadne, who has a good ear for languages. She says there are elves in her world too, and she was curious about learning how the ones here speak." Ellana doesn't think that teaching elven to the latter is wrong, because she's not of this world. She doesn't carry Thedas's history on her shoulders.