faderift | [OPEN] Heaven bend to take my hand

WHO: Hermione Granger and YOU
WHAT: Hermione's seen some shit and is trying to get over it.
WHEN: Mid-Kingsway through the end of the month.
WHERE: In and around Skyhold.
NOTES: Takes place after this plot, so some threads will likely have mentions of child death and/or signs of depression. Please let me know if you'd like me to avoid any triggery topics.

Library

Though the curly-haired rifter has become a staple in the library over the past six months, Hermione has been relatively scarce there lately. She has no real heart for research anymore, not after the things she'd uncovered in those journals in that cave in Fromage, and there's so much more to Thedas than what can be found in books. She'd learned that the hard way, and now instead of reading and taking notes, she finds her thoughts wandering as they rarely do. For once, she can use a distraction from her failed attempts at studying.

Stables

Avoiding people isn't always as easy as she'd like it to be. But if she can preoccupy herself with animals, Hermione can withstand a bit of small talk. There's usually a kitten or two playing around the stables, and if not, at least helping to feed some of the horses will make her feel productive as well as distracted. And if that doesn't work, there's a certain dracolisk that she'd been slowly learning to get friendly with, assuming it won't sense her dour mood and become agitated.

Battlements

The battlements are actually quite pretty. She'd never really come up here before - if she wasn't in the library then that usually means she wanted to be social, and so the courtyards were where she'd spent more of her time - but now that she's looking for a change of scenery... well, there are worse places to get some quiet with a beautiful view. She's not always alone, since there are always people passing back and forth, but most people don't seem all that keen on hassling the young woman perched in between two turrets, staring out into the mountains. Indeed, unless someone happens to recognize her or just manages to catch her as she wipes at a stray tear, most probably wouldn't even know she's there.

Healing Tents

Returning from Emprise had been difficult, for more reasons than one. Beyond the obvious, Hermione still had a few physical injuries that she'd intended to ask the healers in her group to help with on their way back, but had clearly never gotten around to it due to the extenuating circumstances. Of course, she can't indefinitely deal with waking up with a sharp pain in her back and some of the bruises had begun to look particularly gruesome, so there's nothing wrong with making the occasional visit to the healing tents. If she takes care of one thing at a time and sees a different healer each time, it minimizes the chance of any awkward questions being asked, which is all the better; she's not ready to talk about that dreadful day and is in no rush to change that.

Wildcard!

She probably won't be quite so cheery until later on in the month, but Hermione still needs to eat, drink, bathe, and presumably sleep. She may be a little awkward around those that had gone to Emprise du Lion with her, but she isn't about to actively ignore anyone or send them off. Her nerves might be a bit frayed, but there's still such a thing as etiquette, after all.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Hermione would offer to dry her tears off Korrin's shirt, but in all honesty, she's in no particular hurry to use magic for anything ever again. She doubts she can keep that up indefinitely, but with the way she feels right in this moment, she'd be perfectly happy to let a mabari use her wand as a chew toy.

"Without you, maybe," she mutters softly. "I'm not even supposed to be here in the first place. I'm virtually useless."

"Now that is pure bullshit." Korrin gives her a light squeeze, sighing as her heart aches for her friend. If only she could make it easier for her, but there are doubtless more horrors to come. Telling Hermione that this is the worst Thedas has to offer would be a disservice. "You've a damn talented mage -witch- and yeah, being here has changed it on you, but I've never seen anyone work as hard as you to compensate for it. You're brilliant and you care about people, and that's exactly the sort of people we need, magic or no magic.

...but you've been through a lot. If you need to step back and care for yourself first, do it. Don't be afraid to focus on yourself for once, not when you've given so much of yourself before now."

Hermione isn't usually so self-deprecating, or at least hasn't felt that way in a while. Not since she'd been a child, in fact, which says a bit about her current mentality.

She doesn't feel as though she's given much of anything, but she knows better than to say as much. She isn't searching for empty reassurances, for someone to tell her that everything will be all right if she just believes in herself. She just needs someone to be there fr her, and Korrin is fulfilling that role perfectly.

"Thank you," she mumbles against Korrin. "I just-... I'm not used to having all the answers."

"I'll be here to help you get used to it." Because really, it will happen again at some point, and she hopes for Hermione's sake that she'll be able to weather that prospect better in time. "Not that I'm saying it's cause to give up; just because we don't know what the hell to do sometimes doesn't mean we can't try. But it's alright to admit that, and step back when you need it. You're not alone in this, and it's not all up to you. Please try to remember that."

She does feel as though she's all along here. While Hermione values the friends she's made since arriving in Thedas, it's instances like what had happened to that child that make her realize that she doesn't belong here. The rest of the party had seen it as simply a matter of survival and seem to be coping with it relatively easily. The same clearly can't be said for her.

"Thank you," she repeats, because really, that's all that can really be said at the moment. Trying to straight up and pretend for all the world that she hadn't just been crying, she murmurs, "It's good to know I have a friend here."

"You have many, I'm sure, but I'm glad to be among them. Care to join me in the kitchen? I'm thinking it's time for tea and whatever the bakery people have set aside from earlier." It won't cure Hermione's heartache, she knows that. But sometimes taking little moments for themselves can give the mental strength needed to power through those dark times.

If nothing else, Hermione's more than glad for the distraction Korrin offers, even if all she can manage is a small, wan smile. "That sounds nice," she says, voice soft and level. For however subdued she might be, she sounds entirely genuine as she says it.

"C'mon, then." Korrin manages a small smile in turn and steers her away, toward the kitchen. She'll make a mental note to try and share the same missions when Hermione's ready to go out again. If nothing else, she can be there to provide support in the immediate moment, not just afterward.

[OPEN] Heaven bend to take my hand

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