faderift | [OPEN] Heaven bend to take my hand

WHO: Hermione Granger and YOU
WHAT: Hermione's seen some shit and is trying to get over it.
WHEN: Mid-Kingsway through the end of the month.
WHERE: In and around Skyhold.
NOTES: Takes place after this plot, so some threads will likely have mentions of child death and/or signs of depression. Please let me know if you'd like me to avoid any triggery topics.

Library

Though the curly-haired rifter has become a staple in the library over the past six months, Hermione has been relatively scarce there lately. She has no real heart for research anymore, not after the things she'd uncovered in those journals in that cave in Fromage, and there's so much more to Thedas than what can be found in books. She'd learned that the hard way, and now instead of reading and taking notes, she finds her thoughts wandering as they rarely do. For once, she can use a distraction from her failed attempts at studying.

Stables

Avoiding people isn't always as easy as she'd like it to be. But if she can preoccupy herself with animals, Hermione can withstand a bit of small talk. There's usually a kitten or two playing around the stables, and if not, at least helping to feed some of the horses will make her feel productive as well as distracted. And if that doesn't work, there's a certain dracolisk that she'd been slowly learning to get friendly with, assuming it won't sense her dour mood and become agitated.

Battlements

The battlements are actually quite pretty. She'd never really come up here before - if she wasn't in the library then that usually means she wanted to be social, and so the courtyards were where she'd spent more of her time - but now that she's looking for a change of scenery... well, there are worse places to get some quiet with a beautiful view. She's not always alone, since there are always people passing back and forth, but most people don't seem all that keen on hassling the young woman perched in between two turrets, staring out into the mountains. Indeed, unless someone happens to recognize her or just manages to catch her as she wipes at a stray tear, most probably wouldn't even know she's there.

Healing Tents

Returning from Emprise had been difficult, for more reasons than one. Beyond the obvious, Hermione still had a few physical injuries that she'd intended to ask the healers in her group to help with on their way back, but had clearly never gotten around to it due to the extenuating circumstances. Of course, she can't indefinitely deal with waking up with a sharp pain in her back and some of the bruises had begun to look particularly gruesome, so there's nothing wrong with making the occasional visit to the healing tents. If she takes care of one thing at a time and sees a different healer each time, it minimizes the chance of any awkward questions being asked, which is all the better; she's not ready to talk about that dreadful day and is in no rush to change that.

Wildcard!

She probably won't be quite so cheery until later on in the month, but Hermione still needs to eat, drink, bathe, and presumably sleep. She may be a little awkward around those that had gone to Emprise du Lion with her, but she isn't about to actively ignore anyone or send them off. Her nerves might be a bit frayed, but there's still such a thing as etiquette, after all.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

It's good to hear Anders continue to talk about people needing a chance. Even though she's sure he's talking about the oppressed, that could just as easily apply to the oppressors themselves; the whole world can't be so stubborn that they won't admit that they've been wrong and try to find a better way to change things. The Inquisition is proof enough of that.

"Look at that," she remarks, a very tiny, wry smile quirking at her lips. "You're beginning to sound more hopeful already."

It still hurts, thinking about what she'd seen in the cave, about what he'd been forced to do, and if she does think about it for too long, her throat dries out a bit. But she can push back the nausea, knowing that it's hardly as though he'd taken any pleasure in that sort of thing, and she lets a little of the tension fall from her shoulders. "You're a good man, Anders. You've been forced to make some awful decisions in your life, but you're still a good man. I'm sorry if I ever made you doubt that."

He's too emotionally exhausted to offer her a small smile, but he can offer her a hand.

"You're forgiven." It's not really her fault he doubts it often; she'd simply brought it back to the forefront. He's got more friends here now than he's ever had in his entire life and yet the thought of losing even one of them is painful. Even more painful is the thought of losing them due to his actions. "I'm very sorry for what you've already been through in this world and what you're likely to still face. But I'm glad to have you as a friend."

While Hermione is ready enough to admit that there's not necessarily anything to forgive, she still hesitates for a brief moment when Anders offers her his hand. It's a bit like calling a truce, and while she doesn't view this as having been at war with anyone, it still doesn't quite feel right to simply smooth over what had happened.

But in the end, she knows it hadn't been Anders' fault. It all falls back to the state of the world, and she knows she can't change the status quo on her own. So she gently brushes Anders' hand aside, though it's only so she has the room to step in and gingerly put her arms around him in a tentative hug.

"I won't stop being your friend just because you made a hard decision," she murmurs softly. "Heaven knows I've had to make my fair share of those in my life, and losing a friend on top of it would have been devastating."

He hugs her back just as tentatively, partially covering for the sudden drop his heart had done into his stomach when his hand had first been pushed aside.

"It would have been," Anders says quietly. It wouldn't have been the first time that something going wrong had also included fallout that cost him someone too. "Be careful with the wound, and please call me if it gets worse?"

He pulls back from the hug and gives her a small smile. "That's the price of my friendship. I'm horribly obnoxious if my friends do things to prolong their own suffering."

She's almost forgotten about her injury until he hugs her back, and she just manages to avoid flinching from the dull pain. They've just managed to have formed a truce of the most tentative sort; making him think that she's flinching from having contact with him wouldn't really help matters in the least.

Even so, she's a bit relieved when they part, nodding at him and doing her best to offer him a smile, even if it doesn't come close to meeting her eyes. "I'll keep that in mind. It doesn't seem like too terrible a price to pay, given that you're a healer."

Friends. They're friends. And whatever terrible things he might have to do in the future or even that she might be forced to do, they can continue to be friends. She hopes.

"Thank you, Anders. And I'm-... I'm sorry for the way I was acting at first. But thank you. Not just for the salve, but... for caring.

[OPEN] Heaven bend to take my hand

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So late but this thread was too good to drop.

♥

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