semi-open | I'd rather be working for a paycheck

[kremdelacreme]

WHO: Krem and prior/current CR
WHAT: Krem is having a bad day and hiding away so that it doesn't become a Problem
WHEN: some time early Drakonis
WHERE: Skyhold
NOTES: Depression, hints of dysphoria, general malaise

Things had been going less than swimmingly, but that was nothing new. Infighting, outfighting, elsewhere-fighting, and here he was, feeling like twice-boiled hell.

The surgery was supposed to stop this shit, Maker-be-damned, but he still didn't feel like he fit in his own skin, and it made him want to hit something, and more than that, it made him want to disappear. Nobody would have to see him like this, if it happened. He wasn't doing anyone any damned good like this. Sure, he'd given himself a job, mending every last sheet, garment, curtain, that had been passed along to him, but all this quiet and time to himself wasn't giving him any peace. His own idiot feelings were gnawing away at him without the distraction, his hands on autopilot making neat little patches and seams in damaged cloth.

The feeling was more familiar than he'd ever admit. But he didn't want anyone to see him sitting here in his armor, his security blanket, glaring down at the sheet he was mending like he'd set it ablaze with his eyes if he could as he tried to ignore the pressure and sting of tears that he absolutely refused to let fall.

It's a bad day, and he doesn't want to make it any worse on himself just because he's having emotions. Those were for people that had the time and patience for them.

Comments

[el_tybs]

At the apology, Sam sighs, turning his head a bit to regard Krem for a moment before lifting his hand and setting it on the back of the Krem's head, fingers lightly scratching at the short hair there. Seeing as he all the layers of armor on there wasn't much else in the regards to comfort he could give - not without getting poked by metal at least.

"You know you could come talk to me if something is bothering you. I'm here for that stuff, too."

[kremdelacreme]

"I know you are," Krem sighs in return, putting his sewing down and running his hand over his face. "I just don't want you to have to deal with this too. It's not something that's easy for me to explain."

[el_tybs]

"Nothing ever is," he mutters softly, but loud enough for Krem to hear, fingers still lightly rubbing along the back of his head. "I appreciate that you're looking out for me, but seeing you like this isn't very comforting. Just... get it off your chest.