faderift | Open | If you forget, is it like it never happened?

Entry tags:

Open | If you forget, is it like it never happened?

WHO: Cole and anyone who needs or wants him
WHAT: Cole's back. If he ever left. Who really knows?
WHEN: Now until end of February.
WHERE: Skyhold
NOTES: If you want a personal starter, drop me a PM or find me at

jemisard

Those sensitive to such things might notice that Cole is back. He's hard to remember at the best of times, and after such a long period, Cole himself expects virtually no one to remember who he is or that he's allowed to be here.

But it doesn't stop him doing what he does. Moving about, helping those he can.

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She shudders at mention of the White Spire, as Garahel comes running back towards them. "That's a side of the rebellion I'm glad I did not see. Kinloch Hold has its own reputation, but thank the Maker it was not like that." She's had some peers that transferred there, for one reason or another; how many of them are still alive, if any, she has no clue.

Patting Garahel as he arrives, Inessa looks over to Cole thoughtfully. "If you've had some influence here, then Skyhold owes you a debt. I know tensions can easily arise, for one reason or another." Race versus race, mage versus non-mage, and so on. "What do you think, of our status when we first arrived versus now?"

"Lambert wanted them to be scared, to fear, to cower, it made him feel powerful so see mages suffer." The man's presence had physically hurt, his malice almost tangible to Cole.

He listens, but there's nothing like understanding on his face, not really. "We have more food. And less holes in the walls."

"At least he's gone. I'm certain a lot of mages are relieved about that." Herself included, even as she is now under the protection of the Grey Wardens. The world needs less people like him in charge, especially over the fates of those vulnerable.

She nods at the assessment, unable to deny those bald facts. "Quite true, but I was thinking more in terms of people and their morale. Have you noticed any changes there? Do they still have faith that we can defeat Corypheus?"

Garahel whines softly, muffled by the ball in his mouth. He's only interested in one thing at the moment.

"Not gone. Dead. Sweaty skin under my hand, body shakes with fury under mine. What do you want, demon? I want you to look into my eyes."

He does a good mimicry of Lambert's voice, his accent and tones.

Cole turns to Garahel, the dog's need to attention more pressing than answering the question. He takes the ball and pitches it out into the yard.

"I don't know. Most people aren't going hungry. Aren't in pain. Don't Despair."

That mimicry has Inessa shuddering again, and once more she's very grateful not to have been part of the Spire or anything that happened to it. With such men in charge, they didn't stand a chance. As Garahel happily darts off again, she collects herself and nods.

"That's good. I admit I've been wondering at how long cohesion can be maintained, given the various differences among us. It may not be entirely harmonious, but it's been better than I've anticipated.

Do you think there are other spirits like you? Those who found a way to cross over and help? Would you know them for what they are, if they were around?"

Too many things at once and Cole rubs at his face and twists his fingers together. "I don't know about cohesion. I just know people. What will help them."

He rocks on his feet again, head hanging and hiding his face with the brim of his hat. "Solas said I was unique. I know other spirits when I see them. I knew Justice. We know each other. I know every demon we have to destroy."

Inessa's expression softens, about to apologize for asking too much. She didn't want to overwhelm him, after all. But mention of Justice gets her attention, and she stares at the ground, eyes shadowed.

"...ah, yes. I've heard of Justice, though Anders had been freed of him by the time of my arrival. It's a shame there was no saving him, no peaceful parting. Still, the fact that it could be done at all...it's notable."

"Justice isn't gone. Maybe, that shape of Justice is, but Justice remains. In memories, in emotions, in people. In the Fade."

He rocks on his feet again. "It was best. Here was bad for him."

"Being in Kirkwall couldn't have helped. The Veil is so thin there, I felt it when the Inquisition sent me earlier." Inessa's lips form a thin line, wondering how much worse it was when Meredith was alive and the Gallows was active. No wonder Justice went mad. "So when spirits die...they return, in some sense?"

"No. Kirkwall hurt. Kirkwall makes me ache, when people talk about it, I can feel the net, thin wires, cutting into the soul."

He shrugs. "Solas says... our concept still exists. Justice still exists. That Justice, those memories... they still exist in the Fade. Spirits don't die. Not like mortals."

"Sorry, I won't mention that place again. I'm not fond of it, either." Glad to move on from it, Inessa nods thoughtfully. "Is that reassuring? To know what if something happens to you, that what you are won't be lost? Andrastians are told we will go to the Maker's side, but...." Well, they have no way of verifying that.

"Why would I need reassuring?"

Cole doesn't want to stop being. But he doesn't fear it.

"I don't know what happens when mortals die."

"I thought as much. No one does." Inessa would rather know for certain, but since there's no means of that happening, she'll take comfort in the idea of the Andrastian version. "Has being on this side of the Veil changed you, aside from physically? Have your perceptions changed at all?"

She then notices Garahel hasn't been back yet and glances around for him, sighing when she notices him gobbling...something offered by a child. It figures he'd befriend someone who has food on them. But that stare gets his attention and he rushes off to scoop up that ball. "...I suppose it's not quite fair to only ask you questions. I'm far less interesting, but I have been here for a while, so if you need to catch up on what you missed, I can make the attempt."

"I had to be something else to be here. Cole's memories stopped me from... going bad. Insane. Lost. Time and space don't make sense to spirits, having to follow rules about how to move and be."

Cole watches the dog as well, gaze distant. "But I know about you. I knew about you when you spoke to me. I don't need to ask anything."

"So, memories serve as an anchor. That makes sense, I suppose. That sometimes helps us mortals from losing our way as well, you know." Other times, it just makes everything worse, but Inessa's not one of those people and she doesn't want to speak for them.

As she watches Garahel approach, Inessa glances back, caught between curiosity and self-consciousness. Though polite to all unless there's a reason not to be, she isn't exactly the short to let others peel back the layers without getting to know them first. The sudden notion that Cole might have done it anyway is a rather unsettling one. "...how much do you know, exactly? Can you stop yourself from knowing, or does it happen regardless?"

"It let me understand."

Cole shrugs, aware of her sudden discomfort. "Can you stop yourself from hearing a scream? From feeling ice pressed against your skin?" He knows what he needs to to help. He knows a lot more, but he doesn't want to admit that now.

"...no. I suppose not." Patting Garahel before the large, muscly canine heads to Cole, she gathers her thoughts. "But I hope that lack of filter does not extend to sharing such impressions verbally, to those not involved. If you can help others, by all means, but...not everyone wants their burdens revealed publicly. That can create its own problems, however noble your intentions."

Edited 2017-02-24 01:35 (UTC)

"I only act on what will help. I understand secrets, Inessa. Part of Compassion is understanding. I understand."

He knows when to not say anything. He keeps a lot of secrets, even if he sometimes encourages people to speak theirs.

He takes the ball, hand running over Garahel's head. "I'm getting better at sorting it all out."

"Good. I'm very glad to hear it. It can't be easy, learning about what's appropriate this side of the Veil, but I appreciate the effort." The tension within her eases at that; 'getting better' doesn't mean flawless and she'll still try to be circumspect. Even so, the fact that Cole isn't oblivious to such matters is a definite relief. As Garahel leans against him, she smiles. "Watch out, he can knock people off their feet even without meaning to do so."

"He won't. I don't fall over easily." He leans into Garahel easily, because he can't be taken by surprise by a motion like this. "Not hurting people matters most to me."

The affectionate, muscly brick wall that is Garahel happily wiggles against Cole for a moment longer until he looks up at him, eager to continue. Inessa, smile softening, nods. "The Inquisition is lucky to have you, then, Cole. It's easy to lose sight of compassion when fighting so desperate a war. We can't afford to forget that without such standards, we are no better than those we fight."

The ball gets thrown again.

"Act without cruelty. Without the want to hurt. Sometimes killing has to happen, but there's no reason why it should be cruel."

As Garahel rushes off once more, Inessa contemplates Cole's words. She doesn't disagree, though certain enemies come to mind that make compassion a much harder feat than it would be otherwise.

"...what do you sense of the Red Templars? The Venatori?"

"Burning, it aches in my bones, but they said I'll be stronger, better able to serve, it's fuzzy and angry... I don't like being near Red Templars. The lyrium makes them bright and burning." It masks the person in the haze of the rage and heat.

"Venatori are all people. Like everyone here. Some of them are just jerks. Some of them do what they think they have to."

She nods, not surprised by any of it, but nonetheless holding back a shudder as she listens. "I don't blame you for not wanting to be near them, especially the Red Templars. I want to pity them, knowing what the red lyrium has done to their bodies, but then I think about the atrocities they've committed and it's...difficult."

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