[closed] it's not the long walk home that will change this heart

[onlyhymns]

WHO: Cade, Nari, a healer at the end (Sam?)
WHAT: a camping trip turned awkward family reunion
WHEN: sometime in Guardian w/e
WHERE: the easternmost edge of the Planasene forest
NOTES: warning for violence, discussion of self-harm and sexual abuse of a child

Between the flu, the fire, and Kit's passing, things have been rough lately. One of the few boons of Cade's excommunication from the Templars has been an abundance of freedom, with which, until recently, he had no idea what to do.
But sometimes one just needs to get out of the city. Not on a special mission or anything serious, just a little hunting trip, a pocket of time spent in the quiet isolation of nature. It's the one thing he missed from his time in the Hinterlands, and perhaps it's time to do it again.

Nari is invited, for her particular losses, and for her help throughout the flu. She looked out for him, and he's worried what she might do if left alone in the wake of her grief. Perhaps it's best if they both remove themselves for a while.

In separate tents, of course.

It's on the edge of the Planasene where they finally make a less temporary camp, setting up to stay for a few days by a small creek in a grove well-insulated from the still sharp winter winds. It's early morning, and the horses are lazing tethered to a tree, content to spend the day eating grass and rolling in whatever dust is nearby.
Cade is preparing for the day, sitting by the fire and sharpening his arrows, waiting for Nari to join him so they can cast out.

Comments

[nadasharillen]

And join him she does, ducking out of her small tent with a long tall stretch and a deep breath full of the familiar scents of home. It is, that. Home. Even the birds sing it. Elated to be in the forest again she whistles back their calls and curls her toes into the soil... then tucking her chin in brief self-consciousness when she remembers she's not alone.

"Have you had a chance to be much in the Planasene?" she asks, dropping to sit crosslegged by the fire, pulling her well-loved (but long unused) hunting knife from its sheathe to check its edge.

[onlyhymns]

Looking up when he hears a voice, Cade offers a small smile of greeting and shakes his head. "It's rare that I come this far west," he admits, "I'd... mostly end up around Sundermount and the Wounded Coast, if ever I left Kirkwall." And then there was northern Ferelden down to the Hinterlands, but that's hardly relevant. Or especially nice to talk about.
"You're familiar with it?"

[nadasharillen]

"You could say that," replies Nari, her voice full of amusement. "It's rare that I came this far east, but I spent near my entire life in these woods." Until

the crackling noise of the rift, the high surprised wordless exclamation turning scream turning wheeze turning

She sucks in a breath and leans back on her hands, looking purposefully up at the bare branching tops of the trees, their few early courageous buds, the stands of pine that kept watch over the others during the cold months. "You should see it in summer. It's so... green. So many different greens and browns." She blends right in. "Living. Small streams coming down from the mountains in a hundred places, soft moss, birds chattering at each other; it breathes with the wind. Even in the heart of it the sun slants through, even alone you're not alone." The woodworker's smile has turned more fond than amused now. She tilts her head to gesture at the arrows he's working with her nose.

"I wouldn't have marked you for an archer. Part of your training?"

(She should probably check her own quiver, but the fire was nice.)

[onlyhymns]

Though Cade recognizes that kind of faltering breath, the abrupt ending of a sentence, he doesn't know what it's about. Prying won't help, however, so he just nods and looks away until Nari speaks again.

"I trained to be one at the abbey," he replies, looking down at his bow, "...there wasn't much use for it in Kirkwall, but I kept it up because I always thought I was better at it." Swords and shields are well and good if you have the arm strength, and are also more or less all you need when dealing with a rogue mage exploding with demons in a harrowing chamber.

"Are you ready?"

[nadasharillen]

Nari nods, pushing herself to her feet with a whuff of air and moving to put out the campfire with the water she'd collected the previous evening before checking and strapping on her own gear, leaving her bow unstrung for the moment, and finally--ruefully--pulling a pair of boots on. "I've gotten soft," she mourns quietly, but when she turns back to him it's with a small smile.

"Much for tracking, or shall I take point? Unless I've gotten very soft, there are a couple of stands of white oak a few miles to the west where I've had luck before."

day two~

[nadasharillen]

The next morning dawns both same and different. The same sun through the trees, early birdsong, Nahariel ducking out of a tent with a reaching stretch and a deep breath. The tent different, holding a pile of siblings she'd just extricated herself from to rekindle the camp's fire, and Cade wasn't waiting beside the crackling warmth of it. Cade was in the other tent, recovering from the horrific wounds particular to Mirsedis and her arrows, the which she meant to check and re-bandage as soon as the flame caught.

Eventually it did, graduating from tinder to log, and Nari gathered an armful of what she needed and approached the tent.

"Cade?" she asks, a soft query from the outside, "Can I come in?"

Whatever the response she's planning on it, but it's nice to let a fellow think he has a choice in the matter.

[onlyhymns]

He was fortunate enough to fall into a deep and comfortable sleep after their crystal miscommunication, no doubt helped at least in part by the remnants of Sedi's poison, so it takes Cade a moment to wake up when he hears his name.
He looks toward the tent flap, pushing his sleep-mussed blond curls back out of his face and craning his neck as best he can while lying on his stomach.

[nadasharillen]

It moves, and a moment later there's Nari's head. It's followed by her hand, holding up a roll of white linen. Ah--he's awake. And his eyes look clear, that's good. His hair's certainly not soaked with fever-sweat, although...

A smile tugs at the corner of her mouth, followed by immediate mortification when her free hand (thankfully not yet visible) twitches briefly outward of its own accord to put the unruly locks back in order. Nari covers her swift change of expression with a cough, and lets herself the rest of the way in.

"I didn't wake you, did I?"

[onlyhymns]

"Mm-mn," Cade grunts, in lieu of a no, even though she probably did. He looks around slowly, tries to sit up, thinks better of it, and lets his head rest back down with a sigh. Five more minutes.

day three

[onlyhymns]

Cade isn't fully healed by a long shot, but the only sensible thing to do at this point is return to the Inquisition. With the horses having been moved to the Dalish forward camp, he struggles to mount Lady Patience and gingerly sits atop her, hating every moment that his injured thigh chafes against the saddle.
It's going to be a long ride back. And they didn't even do any hunting.

He's been a little too quiet ever since the encounter in the tent with Nari, and judging by how he avoids looking at or interacting with anyone, leaving this Dalish clan behind could not come any sooner. They're similarly relieved to see him go, though the mood is somber as Nari receives her pile of goodbye embraces. The question on everyone's minds is the same: will she ever be back, or is this shem'len the symbol of a greater departure?

Waiting patiently until she's said all her goodbyes, Cade stares forward, his dappled grey mare tossing her head restlessly in hopes of moving forward soon.

[nadasharillen]

A nod and clasped forearms for Ilriane and Lath, an embrace for Halesta and a grinning kiss for the babe (or at least Halesta's growing bump), cheekily ruffled hair for Ghestlin, and a long tight hug for Isen. After a final squeeze, she draws back to touch their foreheads together.

"Come with us," she says. And then, before he can reply, "I know you can't, 'ma assan, but... I want you to remember that I asked." Nahariel pulls back, blinking quickly, and then smiles brightly and waves, pulling herself up to settle on the back of her mount. " Dareth shiral, 'ma halaanen. Mythal'enaste; Ghilan'nain ar ghilana," she calls, turning to look once more at the group of them, and then at Cade to nod, and then at the road ahead.

[onlyhymns]

This whole ordeal has been especially hard on Isen, who hugs Nari tightly, heaving a great sigh as they pull apart, unable to give her a full smile in response. "Dareth shiral," he says in a low voice, hand up in farewell as their sister rides away, prompting Halesta to come rest her head on his shoulder in consolation.

They'll be all right.

As Cade and Nari make their way back toward Kirkwall, the forest just as peaceful and vibrant with birdsong as it was when they first set out, but now there's an unspoken tension riding between them and tainting the air. Cade has an inwardly-focused, vacant look in his eyes, the encounter leaving him weary and sad and, in its way, hopeless. He doesn't know how to come back from this, from any of it.

[nadasharillen]

It felt wrong.

Nari had, in her way, always been alone. She had buried it in Sina, deep enough to make herself forget, but then she had buried Sina, and there it was again. She wasn't always lonely exactly. There was Sam, Korrin, Fern. Myr. She had people who made her smile. But she was always alone. She had her own world somewhere to the side, and then, to her great surprise, she'd found someone else wandering in it. She and Cade had been alone... together. Somehow. And now there was this wall, and it made her chest hurt, and she wasn't sure whether or not he'd built it, or she'd built it, but it was built.

There wasn't any coming back from this, or any of it. But perhaps there was a going forward. If everything fell apart worse, that would hurt too, but if she didn't say something, do something, it would be like this forever, so she wets her lips and breathes in slowly.

"I'm sorry," Nari says into the trees, wincing slightly at how rough it sounds.

back in jerkwall

[nadasharillen]

Seeing the city walls grow upwards had had the precise opposite effect on Nahariel that the rising branches of the Planasene had effected. Kirkwall, and the casual way its denizens looked at her with anywhere from disregard to actual enmity, settled on her like a weighted cloak; even moreso now that she had, held to her chest, whatever small vulnerable sprout of honest connection that had emerged between Cade and herself on their trip. Whatever it is, she imagines it would be about as well received here as it had been by her family.

After a brief quiet conversation with Sam before entering the city proper, she leads Cade through the streets of Lowtown to her friend's home and raps on the door.

[onlyhymns]

The horses are put away (thankfully Cade was able to hand off Lady Patience to someone who saw how badly he's doing), and the rest of the walk is made on-foot, Cade's gait becoming more and more sluggish as the day wears on.
He's bled through the bandage on his leg several times now, and though the one on his shoulder seems to be doing better, he's chilled and white-faced and exhausted by the time they reach Sam's door. If Cade has to stand here long, he's going to collapse.

[el_tybs]

The knock at the door comes within the hour as Nari had said. There's perhaps just a few breathes of time before it is carefully pulled open, clearly Sam having been waiting with nervous patience for him to answer so quick. There's a moment of him taking in the two before him, mostly Cade who looks close to falling over.

"There's a cot in the living area," he instructs, stepping off to the side to allow them entry, ready to close it and lock up once they've passed.

The hallway is short and opens into the living room, warmed and alight with the hearth freshly fed. The furniture has clearly been moved to make for more space for a impromptu infirmary.

[nadasharillen]

Nari nods, worriedly feeling Cade’s half-slump against her becoming more weighty.

“The stitches must have popped,” she says tersely, struggling to aid him over to the cot. “We should have stopped, I knew it was too long a ride.” Not that it mattered now. They were here, Sam was here, Cade was white as a sheet but better off than he’d been at the camp. She was just fretting.

cy's room! 8D

[nadasharillen]

Despite her good humour in the other room, Nari has a thoughtful half-frown by the time she's bending to take her boots off in Cyril's space. It's punctuated by a tsking noise as she discovers the small spread of blood that had soaked into the bottom of her tunic and the legging below its hem from where Cade had leaned against her when they'd stopped.

"Damn," she says ruefully. That made zero articles of clothing that she'd brought on the trip not blooded. "I don't suppose you have wash-water to soak these." Ought to collect his as well.

[samahl]

Cyril is very concerned about grooming, so of course he does. He goes to get it for her and lets her set to cleaning herself as he pulls together something for her to wear to bed. At least his clothes should mostly fit her.

"You know I'm going to ask for details," he says as he brings over a tunic. "But I don't mind waiting until you are ready to talk."

[nadasharillen]

If anyone deserves details, it would be Cyril—who was still Clan as far as Nari was concerned. She’s stripped to her smalls with the rest of her garments soaking when he comes back with a tunic which she slips over her head gratefully. “Serranas, lethallin.” she says, finally sitting on the edge of the bed with a lengthy sigh.

“It’s... the hunters were farther east than I’d thought, and we ran into Sedi and Nymii.” Cyril may have met them at the bonding. Two standoffish blonde women with predatory eyes, “they’ve no love for shem’len.” An understatement. Nahariel stretches, laying over her legs to touch her feet briefly. “Sedi had an arrow in him before I could say anything. Two when my yell reached her. Not that she would have cared,” she says. “I thought she’d kill him. I thought—“

She’d said things. Things she didn’t even really believe. Had said anything. Would have said anything. She was still surprised by it. “—I thought they’d kill the both of us. But my family came.” Nari chuckles breathily, “There are enough of us to make anyone pause. Something happened fast, Sedi took a swing at my brother and my sister got in the way. She’s pregnant, Cy. The first child Dahlasanor’s seen since Sina. With that kind of mistake... they left, the both of them. I don’t think they’ll be back.

“The rest of it is just... we got him patched. Came home. Are here,” she says with a small shrug, a small slightly lost looking smile, “and relying on your hospitality, at least until the morning.”

[samahl]

Cyril listens to her carefully, taking in her words and letting her explain the whole story. When she's done, he seems solemn and thoughtful.

"That must have been terrible," he finally tells her. "I'm so sorry you had to witness all of that. I'm sorry that that much anger leads people to do those things."

cade & sam!

[onlyhymns]

It's around one in the morning when Cade finally stirs, announcing his consciousness with a whimper when he immediately tries to move and is struck by the terrible soreness that even magical healing can leave. But at least he's not outside this time, and though he thinks to grab for his crystal, he is actually still too tired to panic. He rests his head back down with a sound of discomfort and tries to will drinkable water into existence.

[el_tybs]

Soreness was a given seeing as Cade had been passed out while Sam was healing. He could heal wounds that he could see just fine, but soreness was something he needed a conscious patient to point out.

Sam doesn't wake right away when Cade begins to stir, exhausted himself. Thankfully for Cade, Fortitude made it known to the mage as he was sleeping that something was up. It takes a little time to adjust, momentary confusion as to why he's on the couch until he remembers, before he gets up and shuffles over to his patient.

It's more of a guess then knowing what Cade wants, after all he's just making noise, that has him going for a glass of water and carefully raising Cade's head so that he can sip at the offered cup.

[onlyhymns]

Cade tries to lift his head again when he hears someone approaching, and his body tenses, but Sam only tries to help him, and despite the darkness and the uncertainty it's clear what this is. Drinking gratefully, though a bit drips down the side of his mouth thanks to the awkward angle, he strains his eyes trying to see who's helping him.

[el_tybs]

Sam watches to make sure Cade wasn't going overboard with his drinking, so that the man was not going from parched to drowning. When it seems that the man had his full, he places the cup back on the table. It's then that he notices Cade trying to look around.

"You can relax, Cade. Nari brought you to my place to take care of your wounds and let you rest."