[OPEN] Interview With A Mage

[sulahnan]

WHO: Athessa and you!
WHAT: Talking to Magefriends about Magic and Abominations
WHEN: August; Post-Abomination, Pre-Modplot
WHERE: Around the Gallows
NOTES: none yet

i. colin

It's one of the days that sees Athessa helping out in the apothecary, which means busy hands but a mind free to wander. She's separating the buds from dried, woody stems to place each into jars for their individual uses when she speaks:

"I've been thinking a lot about what happened..."

ii. kostos

This isn't a conversation that is going to happen organically. After reading through some esoteric writings on magic in the library, she gives up for a time and stalks off to find Kostos.

"Oi," she calls to him, jogging to catch up with him. "Got a minute?"

iii. isaac

[ Some late night crystal call when Athessa's eyes get tired of reading ]

Isaac, can I pick your brain a bit?

iv. derrica

[ They've had their fair share of difficult conversations of late, and this one bodes no different. The kicker, of course, is that it's far more personal to Derrica than it is to Athessa, so when the latter seeks out the former, she comes bearing gifts. Little spiced cookies and coffee over ice - does Derrica drink coffee? ]

It's not spice cake, but the flavor is pretty close.

v. wildcard/bring out your mage

[ either hmu on disco or plurk and i'll make a starter for you or wildcard me, whichever! ]

Comments

[altusimperius]

"It does, but our Chantry is different." Benedict shrugs one shoulder.
"And I don't really know how the Circles work. I've never been to one."

[keenly]

"The Chantry decides what becomes of us," Colin says with a little shrug. A gleam of steel comes to his eyes. "And you think, if I cannot bear the ways of the Maker, the Void is the only direction I can run in. I'd choose oblivion over spending eternity at the side of such a cruel god, with his cruel people."

[sulahnan]

"Well fuck the Maker, then," She looks to Colin, useless anger rising about how he's been made to feel about the world, about magic, about himself. "It's not like he's the only god. Just the one most cited in the name of cruelty."

She needs to do something so her anger doesn't get misdirected at her friends. Athessa turns back to face the shelves, resuming her work while she talks. "I hope the world doesn't go back to the way it was before the war. It should be different. Better."

[altusimperius]

Unsure of what to say, and still anxious that part of the responsibility for the world situation falls on his people and himself, Benedict gives an awkward nod and falls silent.

[keenly]

"With the Divine we have?" Colin shrugs again. "She'll just be looking for some new trick to keep us from rebelling again. Maybe poisoning us with magebane, if that works out with you, Ben. I'm glad my phylactery's gone, at least."

[sulahnan]

So we get rid of the Divine is her first thought, one she almost voices, but then she latches onto a different one.

"Your what? What's a phylactery?"

[altusimperius]

Benedict wilts when Colin addresses him, remaining silent and looking pensively away. There's something profoundly humiliating about the fact that his magic is still being drugged out of him, robbing him of what constituted so much of his identity for so long. Being reminded of it is always a dash of cold water on whatever his mood was before.

[keenly]

Colin looks regretful when Bene makes that face. This wasn't the time to make that statement.

"Um. When they first bring us in, they take a vial of our blood and cast a spell on it, it lets them track us down if we ever escape. We found a number of them, but I think it was decided none could be destroyed if they weren't claimed by the mage in question."

[sulahnan]

She's quiet for a time, processing what Colin has just said. And as she puts thoughts together, she clenches her fists against the counter.

"So they take you away from your families," she starts, slowly. "They throw you in prison, make it so you can't run or hide from them, force you to follow their rules, and then when everyone should be worried about a fucking world war, they make it so you have to willingly walk into their grasp and trust them not to capture you and hurt you some more if you ever want to be actually free."

It's not fair. It's not right.

[altusimperius]

Benedict looks down, contemplating the floor, his spirits low. These are all things he never had to confront before, and has been dealing with in earnest since he came south.

[keenly]

"You'd have to ask Derrica about the phylacteries. I'm not sure what the process is exactly, but she handles it for us."

His eyes veer toward Bene and he offers a little smile.

"But it's better than it was. That I got any sort of justice against a Templar proves that. That we have any sort of access to our phylacteries proves it, too. We've won some smaller battles, we just need to keep pushing and not let them out of what they've agreed on. Fight for our rights to...to stay with people we love, or keep our own children. As it was, any children born of a Circle mage was taken away and given to the Chantry. Sometimes the parents would be sent to different Circles. If that changes, and if people are allowed to visit their families in the Circle, that would make a massive difference--and it's something so reasonable, so harmless, I don't know why it wouldn't be granted if we pushed. Though most important, more important than inheritance rights, mages need to be allowed in the Chantry."

As oppressive as this subject has felt to Colin since the process of electing the Divine began, something like genuine optimism trickles into his chest now. That's something.

[sulahnan]

Just what she needs; another difficult conversation to have with Derrica while she's trying so hard to balance her feelings.

"Why?" Is what she asks, shoving her anger aside to try and make room for something — anything — else. Maybe hope, maybe optimism. "Why is that most important?"

[altusimperius]

"Because the Chantry runs everything," Benedict quietly interjects, "...all the rules of every country are beholden to it. Even if it's a different one in Tevinter, it's still a Chantry."

[keenly]

Colin aims a finger at Bene. What he said.

[sulahnan]

It should be embarrassing how long it takes for her to get it. And it is, well done. Athessa rolls her eyes at herself and nods.

"To change it from the inside." It makes sense, even if she's not altogether sure how feasible it'd be. But with the anger over injustice still lingering in that corner of her mind, she'd rather see it torn down. "I was thinking maybe we just don't have a Chantry anymore. But your way makes more sense."

[altusimperius]

"For that to work, you'd have to convince a lot of people to stop caring about Andraste and the Maker," Bene says uncertainly, rubbing the back of his neck, "...and... considering whole armies are still marching in their names, arguably including this one, that's probably not going to happen anytime soon."

[keenly]

"And the Chantry isn't the sum of the problem anyway, nor is everything it does bad. It just...probably started it going early by saying Templars and mages mustn't fraternize, that Templars are the holy swords of the Maker and mages are cursed. They were the first ones to pit us against each other, consistently favored the Templars through every conflict, and then got surprised when a war broke out."

[sulahnan]

"That sounds pretty thoroughly bad, Col," She says. If they forbade fraternization, that means they already thought less of the mages, and then by heralding the Templars the way they did, they ensured that anyone not privy to what was happening believed them.

"And that's not even including what the Chantry has done to other people."

It says something when not everything it does is bad still equates to bad enough.

[altusimperius]

With a little shudder, Benedict looks away again. His experiences with Riftwatch have included more than one foul-up, on both his part and theirs, and the discussion of Templars just dredges up more unpleasant memories.

He stares off toward the fireplace, feeling the urge to leave, but finding difficulty in moving his feet.

[keenly]

"That wasn't a defense. The Chantry just isn't the whole of the problem. You get rid of them, you have to negotiate with every country separately for terms. Good news for mages in Rivain, awful news for mages in the Anderfels."

He glances at Bene, noticing his discomfort. "We could...continue this later, possibly?"

With elfroot, probably.

[sulahnan]

Athessa looks between Colin and Benedict, gauging their reactions to this whole topic, and feeling at once like she doesn't want to stop until she understands proper, and guilty for cornering not only one, but two of her friends into talking about it. With a sigh, she nods.

"Yeah, yeah of course, sorry," she says softly, and turns back to face the shelves for a third time. "I just wanna figure out how I can help. If I can help."

[altusimperius]

"It's fine," Bene says, pleasantly enough, looking back to them with his focus returning. "I should get upstairs anyway."

Offering a little wave, he steps away and proceeds about his business, which quickly takes him back out of the infirmary. It's nice that they talked about it, at least.

[keenly]

Colin waves goodbye, releasing a long breath. He goes to the fire to brew a cup of tea.

"He just...looked very uncomfortable. I wanted him to have a chance to escape. Um." He shakes his head. "And it's not a wonderful topic for me either, but I've been facing this music longer than he has. There's things I didn't want to say in front of him, especially given how much he's already had to deal with."

Chamomile flowers go in along with hot water. "It's not just about external things--freedom or captivity, seeing our families, being protected from abuses. Despair might be the most dangerous thing a mage ever has to face. Sometimes literally--that was the demon I battled during my Harrowing."

Stirring the flowers into the water. He doesn't care if he swallows a few.

[sulahnan]

"What's a Harrowing?"

[keenly]

...Oh.

Shit.

He'd figured by now the word was out about Harrowings, especially with Athessa so intimate with Derrica. With it being such a secret in the Circle, it's the one thing mages can destroy just by being loud about it, no negotiations necessary. Still. Athessa won't like this.

"It's the, um, thing I mentioned before. How an apprentice becomes a mage. You get sent into the Fade to be tempted by a demon and prove you can be trusted not to get possessed. Depending on the demon, sometimes you have to battle it. You're, you're surrounded by Templars who are ready to kill you if you become an abomination, or just if you've taken too long. And if you don't want to take the Harrowing, you have the option of being made Tranquil instead. Or. Sometimes it's an option, other times it's picked for you. If they...think you're weak."

He warms his hands with the mug of tea, then suddenly comes back to himself and casts about for another mug. He's not even sure if Athessa wants tea, but it gives him something to do.